competent

One of the trickiest questions for parents is how to set expectations that help our kids thrive and grow without crushing them or making them feel low self-esteem or shame.  

If we don't set expectations we run the risk of making our kids feel like nothing they do really matters, so they can feel overlooked and apathetic about life, but we've all heard about parents who damage their kids through unreasonable demands. Our expectations are born out of our own ideas of what matters, so how do we know that we're not pushing toxic ideas on to our kids?

In this episode we talk about how today's society has come expect very little of our teens, whilst seemingly piling on pressure and expecting too much. We talk about how critical the growth mind set is, the stages we go through in learning a skill, and how we parents can support out teens to grow a wide range of important skills without damaging their self-esteem in the process. 

PREVIOUS EPISODES THAT ARE RELEVANT:
 
Episodes 5, 10, 38 & 40

• https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/parenting-tips-10-helping-your-teen-navigate-friendship-groups-particularly-girls-and-how-to-get-your-teen-to-keep-going-instead-of-giving-up-at-the-first-hurdle/
• https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/parenting-tips-5-how-do-you-motivate-a-teenager-who-isnt-very-academic-what-to-do-when-your-teenager-says-they-want-to-give-up-their-musical-instrument-or-other-activity/
• https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/40-exam-revision-parenting-through-the-pressure/
• https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/38-talking-to-teachers-about-your-teen-how-best-to-do-it-and-why-it-still-matters/

THE SKILL MATRIX:

• Unconscious incompetence.
• Conscious incompetence.
• Conscious competence.
• Unconscious competence.

QUESTIONS THAT WILL EMPOWER YOUR TEENAGER:

•  Are the expectations placed upon me realistic? 
• Do they align with my values? 
• Is meeting those expectations within my control? 
• What and how do I communicate if the expectations are unreasonable or make me resentful?

https://www.sec-ed.co.uk/content/best-practice/nqt-special-what-do-high-expectations-actually-look-like/
https://sonyalooney.com/the-paradox-of-expectations-pressure-and-comparison-in-sport-and-life/
https://www.teachwithmrst.com/post/setting-clear-expectations
Teach Like a Champion by Doug Lemov
Marie Amaro, principal presenter at the You Tube channel the Highly Effective Teacher
https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/life-smarts/202004/parental-expectations-the-helpful-and-the-harmful

Thanks for listening. Please hit the follow button if you like our podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit. You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.

Our website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact us:
www.teenagersuntangled.com

Susie is available for a free 15 minute consultation, and has a great blog:
www.amindful-life.co.uk

Inflation! High interest rates! So…are you fed up with the Fed? Or did you personally have effective strategies for these types of macro changes in the financial realm? And how about your workplace? Let’s face it, we can’t get a divorce from the Fed…but we sure have been warned about the follies of relying on the princes of this world! Join Kevin as we dive into a bit of big-picture macroeconomics and ask a crucial question: are you fed up with the Fed? // Download this episode's Application & Action questions and PDF transcript at whitestone.org.

Have you ever pondered the monumental impact that educators and parents have in shaping a student's journey toward self-discovery and adulthood? With Tami Peterson's return to our dialogue, we immerse ourselves in the profound exploration of this transformative phase. Our conversation delves into the essence of education, far surpassing the simple accumulation of knowledge, to embrace a more holistic approach where identity in Christ, purpose, and adeptness in navigating life's intricate tapestry post-graduation are the focal points. Join us as we discuss the art of equipping students with discernment and problem-solving skills that are indispensable for thriving in the adult world.

Navigating the path of parenting in the fast-paced world we live in can often seem like a daunting climb up an unrelenting mountain. This episode takes a heartfelt look at the 'deep work' involved in parenting, fostering a connection with our children through the power of inquiry and shared experiences. We reflect on how matching our adult strides to those of our children can create moments of understanding and growth. From discussions on creating spaces for curiosity and critical thinking, to sharing the importance of rest and reflection during this climb, Tami Peterson brings to light the journey that binds us all in the pursuit of a meaningful education.

As our conversation draws to a close, we underscore the vital role discernment and wisdom play as our young adults stand at the crossroads of significant life choices. It's about guiding them through moments that shape their future, be it selecting a college major or embarking on a career path. We highlight the ever-evolving responsibility of mentorship and the beauty of parental guidance that doesn't cease with adulthood but continues to offer unwavering support through life's various stages. Tami invites you to lean into this exchange, as we impart a sense of gratitude for the community and encourage a continuation of this essential dialogue.

Stay tuned for more enlightening discussions on classical Christian education, and join us next time on BaseCamp Live! Remember to subscribe, leave us a review, and reach out to us at info@basecamplive.com

Don't forget to visit basecamplive.com for more info and past episodes.

Are you more of a generalist or more of a specialist in your workplace? Either way, have you worked to eliminate the hazard you might be to your organization? What, you say? Me…a hazard? Yes…if you’re not vigilant! Join Kevin for a frank look at the hazards that both key specialists and key generalists can create for any organization…and what good stewards do about that! // Download this episode's Application & Action questions and PDF transcript at whitestone.org.

In today’s episode we’re talking about confidence and self-esteem. More specifically the role of confidence, self-esteem, and the dance between them.

In this episode we discuss the following:
What is the difference between Self-Esteem and Confidence?
How do you define confidence?
How do you cultivate confidence on a physical, emotional,  and mental level?
What does the process of developing confidence look like?
What is the role of confidence and does it deserve more attention than self-esteem?

We hope that this episode will help in expanding your understanding of confidence and self-esteem and see healthier ways to develop them both.

Let us know what you think about this discussion in the comments or via a review. If you have any specific questions to ask, we'd love to hear from you. Send us an email at support@shiftownyourlife.com

What’s one small shift you’d like to make in your life?

Have a fantastic weekend!

1. the Ending we want - "complete, equipped for every..."

2. the Means we don't - "teaching, reproof, correction, training"

3. the Source we can't - "all scripture is breathed out by God"