healing from infidelity

en-usOctober 31, 2023

sexual reintegration after betrayal

sexual betrayal trauma

Episode 36: Reconnecting with Your Intuition After Betrayal

Pam Blizzard from RecoveredPeace.com
Lyschel Burket from HopeRedefined.org
Bonny Burns from StrongWives.com

Today, we are discussing intuition or gut instinct. Intuition is a type of unconscious reasoning. For example, when I have a hunch that it’s better to avoid the highway today when I run my errands, that’s intuition. It oftentimes disappears after a discovery or disclosure because trauma can block intuition for a time. Typically, women are tuned into their intuition and when it goes offline we can feel that everything is unsafe, even when it is not. This is a scary place to be in.

We Discuss:

So, ladies let’s talk about your personal stories where intuition was affected. Did it go offline for you?
What practical tools can we offer our listeners if she’s struggling to hear her inner voice?
What hope can we leave our listeners around the topic of intuition?

en-usSeptember 19, 2023

betrayal trauma

sexual betrayal trauma recovery

infidelity recovery

Episode 33: Why Are Cognitive Distortions Important to Understand When Healing from Betrayal Trauma?

With your co-hostesses:

Pam Blizzard from RecoveredPeace.com
Lyschel Burket from HopeRedefined.org
Bonny Burns from StrongWives.com

Welcome to another episode of Hope For Wives. Today, we are discussing Cognitive Distortions.

There are over 13 common cognitive distortions that we navigate over and over in daily thoughts. CDs are important to understand because they can negatively affect our emotions and choices. They can keep us stuck and interfere with our ability to set boundaries, gain self awareness, and live in community.

We are bringing this to our listeners today because we agree with M. Scott Peck when he said, “Mental health is dedication to reality at all costs.”

As a reminder, we are not mental health professionals. We are professionals and leaders navigating the waters of betrayal trauma with you. Our knowledge comes from the countless hours of training and personal experience each of us have accumulated over the years.

We Discuss:

What are they? ANTs, Unwanted Neg Thoughts
Why would it be important for me to learn about CB as a person who is healing from betrayal trauma?
What have been some of your personal experiences with cognitive distortions?
What HOPE can we leave our listeners?

Resources mentioned in this show:

Here is a short blog post on cognitive distortions from Psych Central.
Take this short course, "Clearing Cognitive Distortions: A Practical Guide to Clarity of Reality" from Pam Blizzard at Recoverd Peace

Scripture references:

Philippians 4:8

en-usAugust 29, 2023

betrayal trauma

cognitive distortions

Pam Blizzard's Betrayal Trauma and Recovery Basics

cogntive distortions

Episode 32: What She Wants to Know About His Thought Life

With your co-hostesses:

Pam Blizzard from RecoveredPeace.com
Lyschel Burket from HopeRedefined.org
Bonny Burns from StrongWives.com

Listen now:

Welcome to another episode of Hope For Wives. Since we know that many spouses in recovery are listening to our podcast, today we are talking to you. We are continuing the discussion around, "How to share my recovery work with my spouse?" This is sometimes tricky to navigate as balance is needed between oversharing and possibly triggering her, and undersharing or just appearing to check boxes and not truly have your heart in it.

We Will be Discussing:

With special guest, Shawna Meek, of Living Stones Coaching. Shawna also contract coaches with Hope Redefined.

What if she wants to know everything, including his thought life? (How do we coach the husband when she wants to know all of his thoughts without him doing more harm? What do we say to the post-disclosure client who wants to know all his thoughts?)
What if he continues to cross the line because he is an over-sharer?
What hope can we leave our listeners around this topic?

Resources:

Lyschel Burket's Hope Redefined Online Groups

Bonny Burns' Strong Wives Sexual Clarity Class

en-usAugust 22, 2023

christian marriage

The Journey Course: Freedom from Sexual Brokenness

Episode 31: What She Wants to Know About His Recovery Work

With your co-hostesses:

Pam Blizzard from RecoveredPeace.com
Lyschel Burket from HopeRedefined.org
Bonny Burns from StrongWives.com

Listen now:

Welcome to another episode of Hope For Wives. Since we know that many spouses in recovery are listening to our podcast, today we are talking to you. We are discussing, “How to share my recovery work with my spouse?” This is sometimes tricky to navigate as balance is needed between oversharing and possibly triggering her, and undersharing or just appearing to check boxes and not truly have your heart in it.

We Will be Discussing:

From your story, how much information did you want to know about his recovery work?
What does she really want to know?

And, as always, we end with a word of hope for our listeners.

Resources:

Unwanted: How Sexual Brokenness Reveals Our Way to Healing by Jay Stringer

en-usAugust 15, 2023

porn addiction

Episode 30: Practical Ways to Navigate the Emotional Roller Coaster

With Your Co-Hostesses:

Pam Blizzard from RecoveredPeace.com
Lyschel Burket from HopeRedefined.org
Bonny Burns from StrongWives.com

Listen now:

Today we are continuing our discussion around the emotional roller coaster nearly all betrayed wives experience after discovering sexual betrayal in their marriage. We explore practical, real life ways to surf the wave of these intense feelings. As always, we share from our professional and personal experience.

We Will be Discussing:

What are some practical ways to navigate the intense roller coaster of emotions?

Resources mentioned in this show:

Pam Blizzard from RecoveredPeace.com
Lyschel Burket from HopeRedefined.org
Bonny Burns from StrongWives.com

Contact any of us through our websites listed above for information on where to find one-to-one support or a community of women healing from betrayal trauma.

Help Us Help Others:

If you have found our discussions helpful, please consider contributing to the cost of production and syndication. Thank you very much!

en-usAugust 08, 2023

infidelity

Episode 28: Spectrum of Triggers

With your co-hostesses:

Pam Blizzard from RecoveredPeace.com
Lyschel Burket from HopeRedefined.org
Bonny Burns from StrongWives.com

Today, we are finalizing our conversation around the more nuanced aspects of triggers.

We Will be Discussing:

What are the spectrum of triggers?
What about when someone else in her world is triggered?

Resources mentioned in this show:

Scripture references:

Psalm 16:1-11

Help Us Help Others:

If you have found our discussions helpful, please consider contributing to the cost of production and syndication. Thank you very much!

en-usJuly 25, 2023

Episode 27: Hidden Wounds Under Triggers

With your co-hostesses:

Pam Blizzard from RecoveredPeace.com
Lyschel Burket from HopeRedefined.org
Bonny Burns from StrongWives.com

Today, we are further exploring triggers. We talked about triggers last season in episode 11. Our discussion now will include the sneaky aspect of triggers, more subtle effects. Triggers are annoying and tend to stick around longer than we want them, too. I often hear how my clients are exhausted from the triggers.

We Will be Discussing:

Will triggers ever end?
What are your thoughts around Dr. Sheri Keffer’s quote that says, “Under every trigger is an unhealed wound?”

Resources mentioned in this show:

Help Us Help Others:

If you have found our discussions helpful, please consider contributing to the cost of production and syndication. Thank you very much!

en-usJuly 18, 2023

Episode 26: Coming Out Of Denial (part 2)

Welcome to Hope for Wives

With your co-hostesses:

Pam Blizzard from RecoveredPeace.com
Lyschel Burket from HopeRedefined.org
Bonny Burns from StrongWives.com

Listen now:

Today, we continue our discussion around denial (or betrayal blindness) and how to navigate the big emotions that surface when denial starts to dissipate.

We Will be Discussing:

What happens when she is starting to see reality and come after denial? What’s the plan out of the darkness?
What grace/hope can we offer our listeners around denial?

And, as always, we end with a word of hope for our listeners.

Scripture references:

Psalm 18:28-30

Help Us Help Others:

If you have found our discussions helpful, please consider contributing to the cost of production and syndication. Thank you very much!

en-usJuly 11, 2023

Episode 25: What's up with denial (part 1)?

With your Co-Hostesses:
Pam Blizzard from RecoveredPeace.com
Lyschel Burket from HopeRedefined.org
Bonny Burns from StrongWives.com

Welcome to Season 2:

At Hope For Wives where we acknowledge the devastation of sexual betrayal and infidelity while offering practical insight and hope for healing, all through a Christian lens. We also hope you’ll find some joy through laughter in spite of our serious subject.

Pam, Lyschel, and I are returning to the recording studio from a 6 month hiatus which was loudly protested by many of our precious listeners. We heard you! and We also want to model for you what excellent self-care and self-containtment boundaries look like.Before we get into the meat of our discussion today, which is around Denial and Betrayal Blindness, we are going to first briefly remind you all of who we are and our mission with this podcast.

Pam – We’ve seen through the last season that our audience includes not only betrayed partners, but husbands in recovery, CSATs, APSATs, marriage and family therapists, and religious leaders.

Lyschel – We commit to continuing to intentionally format this podcast as a “road map to recovery.”

Bonny – As mentioned in the intro, our mission is to acknowledge the devastation of sex betrayal and infidelity while offering practical insight and hope for healing it’s all through a Christian lens and we also hope you’ll find some joy through laughter in spite of our serious subject.

We will be discussing:

When we talk about a betrayed wife possibly experiencing denial, what do we mean?
Did you ever experience denial or “betrayal blindness?”
What grace/hope we can offer our listeners?

Catch the rest of this discussion in our next episode. Thanks for joining us for Season 2! If you want to help others find our podcast, please leave a 5 star rating and a positive review. Also, if our discussions have helped you in any way, would you consider donating to the expenses of this podcast, podcast production and syndication all involves fees that we have been paying out of pocket? It would help us tons if you would like to help with production costs.

Help Us Help Others:

If you have found our discussions helpful, please consider contributing to the cost of production and syndication. Thank you very much!

en-usJuly 04, 2023