#marriage #money #marriagetips #men #modernhusbands #modernmen #relationships #relationshiptips

Chris has mastered the art of the deal as a business and sales professional for 20+ years. Ericka has helped 500+ clients and various corporate audiences get real and naked with money for 18 years. Together they have leveraged this corporate and real-world experience for their own bottom line. Most importantly, Chris and Ericka have been married for nearly 25 years. They both grew up in single-parent households and didn’t have a lot of excess money to go around. As a result, they wanted to provide a more stable foundation for their two daughters.

Chris and Ericka have successfully become millionaires, helped one daughter graduate from college debt-free and the other one is on her way. Through their podcast, For Better & Worth, they are here to show you that a healthy net worth and a happy, lasting relationship is possible.

Links

• For Better & Worth
• Download free: “You’re doing it backward: 7 Reasons Your Money Relationship Isn’t Working with Your Partner”
  
  

Show Notes

0:00 Introduction
1:35 Everyone picks on Brian for being an Ohio State Football fan :-)
3:36 A few examples of moments that are easy for Ericka, Chris, and Brian to give advice on but are hard for them to do
12:15 Whether to involve a financial planner on a money date / conversation with your partner
14:05 Brian shares his experience trying to time the stock market
16:54 How to remind yourselves to meet regularly to talk about money
28:45 Chris and Ericka’s non-negotiables in their financial lives
32:40 The financial floors and ceilings of the non financial negotiables
34:53 Brian and Hope’s non-negotiables in their financial lives
37:40 What steps Dr. Ross has taken during the engagement process that have been most beneficial to you thus far

Five driving questions from Dr. Ross:

• What brought you joy or excitement this past week?
• Is there anything I have done to hurt you this past week that we can repair now?
• What are you looking forward to in the upcoming week?
• What’s something worrisome/hard that’s happening in the upcoming week(s)? Is there something I can do to help?
• What can I do next week to make you feel more loved? 

Modern Husbands Links

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Welcome to the Modern Husbands podcast, where any combination of Dr. Ross, Christian, and Brian host national experts who share winning ideas to manage money and the home as a team.

Join your fellow modern husbands and have links to our podcasts, articles, and other resources to manage money and the home as a team sent to your inbox every couple of weeks by subscribing to our newsletter at modernhusbands.com/newsletter. 

For today, Julia Carpenter of the Wall Street Journal will share some of the money wisdom she has gained in her career journey, including her current personal finance reporting with the Wall Street Journal.

Enjoy today’s show.

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Nate Astle is the Founder of the Financial Therapy Clinical Institute. He is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Certified Financial Therapist. He specializes in couples, emotions and money, and financial trauma. As a past board member of the Financial Therapy Association, he has been featured in numerous outlets like CNBC, USA Today, TD Ameritrade, and Money Geek.

Today’s discussion will focus on how to argue less about money. 

Nate will respond to a number of questions, including: 

• Can you walk us through your professional background and share a bit about what you do now?
• When should couples begin to have conversations about money?
• What are examples of how couples can first prompt conversations about money?
• What most commonly triggers fights about money?
• What are strategies you can use to manage money with your spouse without fighting?
• What is one simple and actionable strategy you want our listeners to walk away understanding?

Website: Financial Therapy Clinical Institute
LinkedIn: Company Website

Podcast Sponsor: Money Marriage U 

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Guest: Sonya Lutter, Ph.D., CFP®, LMFT
Professor of Practice, Director of Financial Health and Wellness, Ph.D. Program Director
School of Financial Planning at Texas Tech University
https://www.depts.ttu.edu/hs/pfp/Lutter.php

Dr. Lutter shares how to reduce money induced stress and anxiety in relationships.

Sonya Lutter holds a Ph.D., CFP®, and LMFT and serves as the inaugural Director of Financial Health and Wellness at Texas Tech University. She leads curriculum and continuing education opportunities in the areas of financial psychology, financial therapy, and financial behavior. Dr. Lutter is also the owner of EnLite.World, a research and training consultancy firm for financial planners and therapists. Her work is regularly featured in major news outlets such as the New York Times and the Wall Street Journal.

Show Notes

0:00-1:23 Introduction
1:24-3:43 How Dr. Lutter’s professional background provides her with the unique insight to understand how to reduce money induced stress and anxiety in relationships.
3:44-5:48 The important trends and changes in marriage and money that cut across all socioeconomic status. 
6:06-7:11 How Covid has impacted how we talk and approach mental health and financial therapy
7:12-11:58 How money induced stress impacts our relationships with our friends
11:59-14:36 How you can approach friends or family about affordable fun for you, when they can afford to do much more 
14:37-17:02 How stress and anxiety triggered by our financial circumstances impact our work relationships and productivity, and what can we do about it
17:03-20:19 How the virtual work environment plays into the same challenges.
20:20-28:12 How money induced stress and anxiety impacts our marriage, and three specific and easy steps we can take to do something about it. 
28:13-29:58 The most key takeaway for listeners and the conclusion

Related Resources and Articles

Audio Podcast: https://modernhusbandspodcast.buzzsprout.com/ 

Video Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d5j9UPlMKTQ&list=PLfW95bKh12LifUxYcIYfeqsk25o5mQFR7 

Modern Husbands Website: https://www.modernhusbands.com/ 

Modern Husbands Newsletter: https://www.modernhusbands.com/newsletter 

Online Courses: https://moneymarriageu.thinkific.com/  

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Dr. Streib is an Associate Professor at Duke University and holds a PhD in Sociology from the University of Michigan. She is the author of three books. For today’s discussion we are focusing on The Power of the Past: Understanding Cross-Class Marriages looks at how couples who grew up in different class backgrounds think about how to spend money, plan their careers, raise their children, and express their emotions.  

Show Notes

• Up to 1:03: Introduction
• 1:04-1:54: What the book is about. How married couples who grew up in very different classes manage the home and money together. 
• 1:54-2:49: Dr. Streib’s passion behind understanding cross class marriages and the process she used to interview couples for her research and book.
• 7:15-11:15: The specific challenges people face who come from different socioeconomic backgrounds
• 11:16-15:00: A deeper dive into gender differences
• 15:01-17:43: Why women feel like they must manage the home but they are working and how couples work through it.
• 17:44-22:38: Examples of common conflicts in parenting and how to work through 
• 22:39-23:31: Is marriage easier for people from different income backgrounds?
• 23:32-27:28: Was there resentment from women who took on more housework tasks and how did they work through it?
• 27:29-29:13: How do you work through differences if you can’t hire a housekeeper?
• 29:14-33:35: How couples from different backgrounds approach the house they wanted and how that impacts where you live and decorating your home (which isn’t the same as clean)
• 33:36-35:15 How do couples work through the friction of two different visions of what a home should look like – and how to work through it.
• 35:16-39:23: Parting and important advice
• 39:24-39:50: Conclusion
  
  

Related Resources and Articles

• Online Courses: moneymarriageuniversity.com
• Website: modernhusbands.com
• Power of the Past: Understanding Cross Class Marriages

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Sarah Suatoni MA, LPC is a Managing Partner at the Mindkind Institute. Sarah is a licensed Professional Counselor with vast experience, including helping married couples. She partners with leaders to develop emotional and social intelligence, mindful presence, and interpersonal skills along with a clear sense of purpose and values. Her corporate clients include Goldman Sachs, Google, and the World Bank.

Show Notes

• 0:00~0:05 Introduction
• 0:05~2:38 Sarah’s work
• 3:14~8:19 Gender roles history vs reality 
• 12:45~15:05 Uncoupling masculinity and money vs. femininity and nurturing 
• 15:07~15:47 Common sense approach 
• 16:25~19:30 What conversations arise from talking about gender roles?
• 19:30~22:08 Sarah’s suggestions on what we could do differently
• 23:30~24:28 System site work: swap roles 
• 25:25~27:44 The power in flexibility 
• 31:18~35:25 Sarah’s specific advice on what to do when roles are shifting
• 36:35~38:04 Key takeaway
• 38:11~38:35 Conclusion

Related Resources and Articles

• Online Courses: https://moneymarriageu.thinkific.com/ 

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Various surveys have found that fighting about money is the primary reason couples divorce. We hosted incoming Financial Therapy President Ed Coambs to discuss the warning signs of danger and next steps for those who could be facing significant relationship problems that derive from money.

Ed Coambs is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Certified Financial Therapist-Level I™, and Certified Financial Planner®. He is also the author of The Healthy Love and Money Way. Mr. Coambs is a Master of Arts in Christian Counseling, and Master of Business Administration (Finance Concentration).

Visit Healthy Love and Money to learn more about Ed.

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A Modern Husband support’s his partner’s career ambitions, and roots for their career successes. They respect their partners and want to help lead many of the efforts around the home. They believe managing money responsibly is important, and prioritize living a life full of experiences. 

We are honored that a trailblazing Modern Husband joined us today to share his wisdom.

Show notes
0:00-1:38 Introduction
1:39-8:13 Why do some men struggle with accepting that their partner makes more than them
8:14-8:30 Modern Husbands Ad
8:31-12:11 Dan's journey in becoming a “Modern Husband”
12:12-14:14 Dan’s advice to newly married couples 
14:56-16:35 How Dan and his wife maintained their careers while raising 3 children 
16:36-18:20 Dan's perspective on being practical 
18:51-20:28 Dan’s perspective on when the right time is to have kids
20:30-25:00 Dan’s experience with meeting and going on Oprah’s show 
25:00-27:49 Conclusion

Dan Kadlec and his wife are a power couple. is a trailblazer Modern Husband. Dan is an author and was a journalist for decades with USA Today and then TIME and MONEY. Kadlec has appeared on Oprah, CNN, CNBC, Good Morning America, and many other programs. Dan is also a Modern Husbands Advisory Board member. Dan’s wife Kimberly, is the CMO & SVP Global Marketing Solutions & Customer Marketing at Visa, Inc. 

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Nearly half of married Americans commit financial infidelity – being deceitful with money. We hosted Dr. Hensley to discuss financial infidelity, the consequences, how to spot it, and how to talk about it with your partner. Dr. Billy J. Hensley joined us to discuss financial infidelity.

Show notes:
0:00-1:50 Introduction
1:51-7:55 The importance of understanding financial infidelity 
7:56-8:13 Modern Husbands Ad
8:28-9:26 Dr. Hensley’s definition of financial infidelity 
9:27-11:36 How common is financial infidelity?
12:30-14:37 Common signs your partner is committing financial infidelity 
14:38-18:18 Reasons people commit financial infidelity
18:19-21:28 Is there a method to managing money where partners still have freedom? 
→ find out what works best for your relationship 
21:29-24:15 Effects of financial infidelity on relationships 
24:16-29:30 How do you approach your partner if you think they’re committing financial infidelity? 
29:31-31:51 How can you work with your partner to rebuild trust after financial infidelity occurs?
31:52-32:51 Conclusion

Dr. Hensley is president and CEO of the National Endowment for Financial Education®. Under Hensley’s leadership, NEFE’s research agenda has driven the national dialogue about financial education, including one study ranked in the top 5 percent of the Social Science Research Index. Dr. Hensley also serves on the CNBC Financial Wellness Council. 

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• Budgeting 101 for Couples

NEFE Resources

• NEFE Research: 2 in 5 Americans Admit to Financial Infidelity Against Their Partner

NEFE Life Values Quiz: A research-based tool to help you better understand why you make the decisions you make. The quiz takes only a few minutes and measures where you are in terms of four values (those hidden inner drivers) that affect your decision making, whether you are aware of them or not.

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