postnuptial agreement

Hi Frances! 
Our guest today is Lisa Zeiderman. Lisa is Managing Partner at Miller Zeiderman LLP, based in New York. A matrimonial attorney, CFL and Certified Divorce Financial Analyst, she regularly handles complex financial and custody divorce matters, as well as pre- and post-nuptial agreements for high-net-worth individuals. 

Named to the Crain’s New York list of Notable Woman Attorneys for 2021 and 2023, as well as a Crain’s New York Notable Diverse Lawyer for 2022 and a Hudson Valley Best Lawyer in 2022, 2023 and 2024, among many other awards, Lisa is a founding member of the American Academy of Certified Financial Litigators and a member of the panel for Attorneys for Children. 

In addition to authoring a well-read blog on Psychology Today, “Legal Matters: Understanding Mental Health Issues as They Apply to Divorce and Child Custody,” Ms. Zeiderman is regularly published in Financial Advisor Magazine, the New York Law Journal, and by the Forbes Business Council. She is also interviewed on issues ranging from financial empowerment to tax issues to child custody in a host of media and podcasts, and speaks on these issues as well.

Ms. Zeiderman, a Fordham University of Law graduate, also serves as the Vice President of the executive board of Savvy Ladies, Inc., is the President of the Justice Brandeis Society, and serves on the board of Family Legal Care (formerly known as LIFT, Legal Information for Families Today). Lisa is also a member of the Forbes Business Council and Chief.

About Our Guest

Judith Kaluzny practiced divorce and family law in Fullerton, CA, for over 40 years. She began mediating in 1986 and was trained in the best programs, more than 100 hours. Then she limited her practice to guiding people through various marriage and partnership issues, from pre-marital agreements, staying together agreements to resolve problems and improve the relationship, to the divorce process. She mediated for couples from the counties of Riverside, San Bernardino and Los Angeles, as well as Orange. Her clients did not need to go to court to complete the dissolution of marriage process. She didn’t start off doing mediation, but her friend used her as attorney consultant and as she sat in on mediation, she became interested and quit litigation to start mediation. She has seven children and learned a great deal from them. Now she writes and continues to freelance as a reporter and contributing writer for the Fullerton Observer. 

Notable Links:

Website: https://www.judithkaluzny.com/?fbclid=IwAR0MVchpfq9uQg39Fz5zp0XZ5IVWzLXMkGMqZVNUOzEvHV1dbfPwpV-HxFw

Book: https://marriagelicensetest.com/

Movie Mentioned: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0138524/

S2 Episode 3: What is an Exit Strategy and Why You Need One 

Episode Summary

For many people, ending a romantic relationship is one of the most difficult things they can imagine and so they often make choices that are unintentionally hurtful, damaging, and disrespectful to their former partner.  Whether it is very early in a relationship or a couple is married, how you end a relationship can have serious emotional, physical and financial consequences if it is not done correctly or in a respectful manner.  Hence the importance of an exit strategy.

Once you have identified your wants and needs, it becomes obvious in a relationship if the other person is meeting your expectations.  If the person you initially selected is no longer fulfilling your emotional or physical needs, then you should move on.  By entering every relationship armed with the knowledge that there will be an expiration date, you should have an exit strategy in the back of your mind as you make life-altering decisions.

Practicing self-preservation is not only healthy for you, it is a respectful act towards your partner.  By setting appropriate boundaries and not allowing another person to pressure you into making a more serious commitment than you want or are ready for, you are protecting each person from making costly mistakes.  If the two of you are in a healthy relationship that satisfies both of your needs and wants, the exit strategy is nothing more than an insurance policy.  You hope you never have to use it, but if something happens, you are prepared to walk away minimizing the damage to you and the person you once cared for.

At the end of each episode, Marlee and Lis vent about commonly experienced issues in romantic relationships. In this episode, the ladies discuss how disrespectful it is when a partner agrees with you just to shut you up.

Show Notes

Do you have a relationship exist strategy? We always talk about starting and maintaining a relationship, but rarely do we discuss the proper ways of ending a relationship. An exit strategy is a plan you keep in the back of your mind to end the relationship in a way that minimizes damage to yourself and damage to the other person.

Your exit strategy is like an insurance policy. You don’t want the bad thing to happen, but you’re covering yourself in case it does. It never hurts to be prepared. Communicating your intention to end the relationship because it is not a good match should be done in a clear, respectful manner so that everyone can preserve their dignity.

It helps to think ahead. The more complicated and involved the relationship becomes, the more complicated and involved your exit strategy will have to be.

The intention of an exit strategy is to give you peace of mind. You’re able to make decisions about the future when you’re in a clear state of mind, as opposed to being caught up in the emotions of the moment. Being prepared for what could happen in your relationship is never a bad idea.

In this episode, the vent session topic is: When your partner agrees with you just so you’ll shut up. This is passive-aggressive behavior and leaves no satisfaction on either end. It’s also dismissive and counterproductive. It indicates the individual who always agrees has zero interest in understanding your wants and needs.

Please make sure you subscribe to the podcast so you can receive notifications of new episodes right when they are released. Also, make sure to follow us on Instagram and Facebook.

Visit us at www.romancipation.com

Manisha Hemendra Bhatt of Greater Boston Legal Services and Jennifer C. Roman of Tracey & Associates discuss Muslim marriage contracts in the context of negotiating and drafting separation, paternity, prenuptial, and postnuptial agreements in this podcast excerpted from MCLE’s family law live webcast on 10/25/2021. The full program is available as an on demand webcast or an MP3 here. Get 24/7 instant access to hundreds of related eLectures like this one—and more—with a subscription to the MCLE OnlinePass. Learn more at www.mcle.org/onlinepass.

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If there were ever a “right way” to prepare for divorce, look no further than Bill and Melinda Gates. Like many couples with wealth and assets at stake, they most likely relied not only on matrimonial attorneys, but also, the expertise of business lawyers and financial advisors. By having the experts work together, divorce can be planned out and assets protected. In this episode, our guest is Sandra Radna, a leading attorney specializing in divorce and family law in Long Island, and author of You’re Getting Divorced…Now What?  She has been featured in The New York Times, Newsday, WABC News, and News 12 Long Island, and recognized by the Long Island Business News as a Top 50 Women in Business in 2018. 

Listen in as Sandra shares her expertise in what you need to know about divorce and your finances. For instance, do you live in an equitable distribution or community property state? If you’re engaged, what is the best way to discuss with your partner a prenuptial agreement? How can you protect your inherited assets? Is your business considered a marital asset, and how can you determine the value of your business? How can estate planning help safeguard your property? Join us as we delve into what you need to know about the divorce process and how to protect your assets.

The ladies discuss if children can give informed consent to treatments that delay puberty or help them to transition gender and whether hormone blockers should be given to children at all, the pros and cons of prenuptial agreements and if it's reasonable to expect to maintain the lifestyle you enjoyed as a couple in the event of a divorce, the influencer pay gap and whether a creative union is the solution to fairer fees for all, and if our goals represent our true personal ambitions or what society expects us to achieve in life.

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LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE 

https://unitedmelaningroup.com/es017

(Website – Show notes)

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-51676020

(Article – NHS gender clinic 'should have challenged me more' over transition – Alison Holt for BBC News)

https://gids.nhs.uk/puberty-and-physical-intervention

(Explainer – Puberty and Physical Intervention – GIDS (Gender Identity & Development Service) Website)

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-54374165

(Article – Children's gender identity clinic concerns go back 15 years – Hannah Barnes for BBC News)

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-51033911

(Article – NHS use of puberty blockers legal challenge begins – Alison Holt for BBC News)

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/gender-dysphoria/

(Explainer – Gender dysphoria – NHS Website)

https://youtu.be/QOOw2E_qAsE

(Video – I’m Coming Out. – NikkieTutorials YouTube channel)

https://youtu.be/4lJ6DLABXwA

(Video – 16 Criminal Justice, Photos Of Your Ex, Period Poverty & Age Gap Relationships | ETHNICALLY SPEAKING – United Melanin Group YouTube channel)

https://www.bravotv.com/the-real-housewives-of-potomac

(Website – The Real Housewives Of Potomac – Bravo)

https://www.capitalxtra.com/artists/dr-dre/news/wife-nicole-young-divorce-settlement-2-million/

(Article – Dr. Dre's estranged wife Nicole Young explains why she needs $2 million per month – CapitalXtra)

https://www.instagram.com/influencerpaygap/

(Instagram account – @influencerpaygap)

https://thecreatorunion.com/

(Website – The Creator Union)

https://twitter.com/Jeremy_Tardy/status/1304498705853079552

(Twitter thread – Jeremy Tardy on leaving Dear White People – @Jeremy_Tardy on Twitter)

https://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/insecure-nailed-the-unfortunate-narrative-around-the-black-womens-pay-gap_n_597f5781e4b02a4ebb771f86?ri18n=true

(Article – 'Insecure' Nailed The Unfortunate Narrative Around The Black Women's Pay Gap – Zeba Blay for HuffPost US)

https://www.netflix.com/title/80095698

(Netflix TV Series – Dear White People – Created by Justin Simien)

https://www.theguardian.com/film/2020/sep/29/chadwick-boseman-gave-part-of-his-21-bridges-salary-to-sienna-miller

(Article – Chadwick Boseman gave part of his 21 Bridges salary to Sienna Miller – Lucy Campbell for The Guardian)

https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20171117-why-we-should-all-give-up-on-goals-already

(Article – Why we should all give up on goals already – Amanda Ruggeri for BBC)

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Each week join Anissa, Luanda Yasmin and Sophie Hannah, three smart, curious and opinionated highly-melanated women, as they discuss everything from current affairs to pop culture, and everything in between. No subject is off limits for these ladies, especially when it comes to issues affecting British communities of colour. Get ready to laugh, learn and liberate your mind, because if there’s one thing you can guarantee, it’s that the Ethnically Speaking ladies will be giving it to you straight!

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