rainbow baby

Stillbirth is defined as the loss of a baby between 20 weeks' gestation and birth. Globally 1 in 160 expecting families experience stillbirth, and that incidence is ever greater in the U.S. If this number is surprising that's because stillbirth isn't really talked about. And the effect of the silence is isolation. While society is well-meaning, we're often ill-prepared to truly understand the emotions felt by these parents. Especially the mothers, who tend to have have their own unique set of emotions beyond grief. What does she most need from us? What comments are helpful, and which are hurtful? When, if ever, should you presume it's time to stop asking her how she's doing? To stop mentioning her baby? Our own nervousness and lack of understanding can misreflect the compassion we feel.

March is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness month. In today's roundtable Samantha, Laura and Jessica are here to share their stories, starting with the births of their babies Alana, Henry and Teddy. If you are pregnant, or feel it would best serve you to skip those details, then you can jump directly to the fourth chapter marker halfway through this episode. If you listen to the very end, you may be surprised to hear appreciation and inspiration make their way into these women's stories, not in spite of their babies, but because of them. You'll also learn that nothing is more important and meaningful to these women than telling their stories, saying their children's name, and honoring their existence. And for giving them this opportunity to be heard, thank you for listening.

Star Legacy Foundation
Stary Legacy Foundation - NY Metro Chapter
Pregnancy Research Project
Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month
Glow in the Woods
PALS: Pregnancy After Loss Support
Faces of Loss
An Unexpected Family Outing
Still Standing Magazine
How Family & Friends Can Help
Parenting in Pregnancy


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Back in 2014, Elyse and Brad had what they thought was a pretty straightforward idea: to have a baby! Turns out, it wasn't going to be so straightforward after all. 

What followed were three grueling years of charting temperatures, peeing on sticks, having nervous breakdowns in the baby section of Target and blowing up multiple friendships. And that was all before going to their very first fertility clinic appointment.

The silver lining? Going through this incredibly isolating and horrific experience gave them the idea behind Fruitful Fertility - the company they founded which connects people emotionally struggling with infertility, IVF and miscarriages with a fertility mentor - someone who has "been there and injected that."

ISSA TAKEOVA!! In honor of National Rainbow Baby Day (August 22nd), we handed the mics over to three amazing moms of #RainbowBabies! Meet Maaden (@LoveMaaden), Chimyra (@_Chimyra), and VeCoya (@Vecoya)! Listen in as these ladies discuss their experiences as first-time moms to rainbow babies, infertility, and loss. 

What is a Rainbow Baby: A rainbow baby is a name coined for a healthy baby born after losing a baby due to miscarriage, infant loss, stillbirth, or neonatal death. The name ‘rainbow baby’ comes from the idea of a rainbow appearing in the sky after a storm, or after a dark, and turbulent time.

Where can you can find these lovely ladies?

Maaden: www.lovemaaden.com

Chimyra: www.journeyofchimyra.com

VeCoya: www.lovethehairyouweardc.com

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Keep the conversation going and the drinks flowing!

What do you say to someone facing unimaginable pain? (Better yet, what do you NOT say?) How do you return to normal life after grief? When did our moms become so wise? And how quickly will our children realize we don't know what we're doing? 

Dive in to all this and more with Anne Harris, who brings joy and laughter to her family's story of infant loss, rainbow babies and faith when hope was hard to find. Learn what it's like to grow up in a family of six, how life without an Instagram filter still holds plenty of beauty and why there's no gold medal for grieving. 

Thanks for being here, y'all! I'd love your thoughts, questions, ideas, and everything in between. You can find me at @ButNotAllAtOnce on social media or ButNotAllAtOnce.com.

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