tomsegura

YMH is making NFT's! And you can get yours starting next week with an account at https://Jambb.com!  It's Jean Day with your main mommies Tom Segura and Christina P and we get into cool body mods, Enny's incredible DM tip, and open with a cool guy into clabbered milk. Tom notices a pattern with Unk Shine, Christina notices a terrible Southern fashion trend, and we see a cool accident at a factory. Tom now listens to dark film scores, we smell Gwyneth Paltrow's Goop candle, and we dive into cool confrontations. Christina reveals the new way she blows her nose, we learn something cool about Conald Peterson, we go through another round of Christina's TikTok curations, and Tom addresses the recent passing of his father, Top Dog. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

YMH Live 7 is now available! Watch the stream this Thanksgiving Weekend while you still can! Get your tickets here: https://livestream.ymhstudios.com/ CHICAGO! Come see Tom live on his birthday, April 16! Presale starts this Wednesday at 10am local time. Get tickets at https://www.ticketmaster.com/event/04005AE7FAE32A7B and use code EVERYWHERE SPONSORS: - Head on over to https://Stance.com and pick out whatever styles you like. Enjoy the color and comfort of a life less ordinary… with Stance - Go to https://saatva.com/theshit for $200 off your order - Go to https://Squarespace.com/MOM for a free trial and when you’re ready to launch, and use the offer code MOM to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain - Get your first refill FREE at https://GETQUIP.com/MOM. - Go to https://WHOOP.com and use code “MOM” at checkout to save yourself 15% off today. - Get 20% off and free shipping by going to https://manscaped.com/MOM. - Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app now, use promo code MOM, bet just ONE DOLLAR on any Thanksgiving NFL game and win ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS IN FREE BETS if either team scores a point. - Get 25% off your membership at https://Fitbod.me/MOM We start off this week of Your Mom's House Podcast with Tom Segura and Christina P jamming to a classic #YMH banger, "Vocal Fry" by Gaping Dad! With all this vocal fry talk, we start talking about the family that made it popular, the Kardashians, and how insane of transformation Kylie Jenner has had over the years. That leads us to discussing the Travis Scott fiasco as Astro World. Tom then talks about going to sporting events with his dad, Top Dog, who has a real problem with parking/traffic anxiety. We open on a grandpa who gives an update on his brown situation, and we get another sneak peak at the primo googling skills Nadav has to offer as well as an update on airport codes! The mommies discuss how miserable Thanksgiving can be and give tips on the little things you can to make it slightly more bearable. We see the newest British rendition of our favorite garage worker and wonder what kind of revenge you can participate in legally. Eye for an eye? We then unveil a new FedSmoker video (to us) where he seems to be falling head over heels for lady he met at the district attorney's office of a town he's passing through. How would you react if FedSmoker started making a pass at you? We talk about Top Dog saying words wrong for almost no reason, like concierge, Joe Pesci, and Washington. We watch some cool clips of the guy with the pet liger and an old lady who claims to not have a stinky meow. Christina makes the claim that if Tom was single he'd be a "weird alone guy." The Apple store has one of the absolute worst in-store experiences of any company in the world, we see a cool guy withstanding quite a bit of horsepower, and we wrap with Christina's TikTok curations! Happy Thanksgiving and make sure you give thanks to those you're thankful for and try not to eat too much but also make sure you eat enough. Okay have a great week! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The 2 Bears are back in the Cave this week for ANOTHER extra episode to help you stay safe at home! First, remember to check out Bert Kreischer's special "Hey Big Boy" and Tom Segura's special "Ball Hog" on Netflix now! The bears start off with sharing a drinking game someone made on Bert's podcast habbits called "Bertus Interruptus." Can you survive it? Then Tom shares his story behind his new "Wash Your Hands" merch and the story of contacting the widow of the famed "Wood" who most of you have seen via text messages. Bert talks about his recent trip to the dentist and how much of an emergency his root canal was. He was sleeping with RAW ONIONS in his mouth! All new teeth for Berty Boy? Then Tom and Bert trade stories about getting fired (which makes Bert LOSE CONTROL) , sleeping around in their early days, and how good Bert is at listening/acting. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Oh my what a good time we have for you here. The Voice, Michael Schiavello superb sports broadcaster and all-around great guy became a world-wide phenom this week when his pronounciation of Danny Mainus' last name sounded more like My Anus and well, hilarity ensued - especially if you are like a 5th grader like we are. Luckily for us, Schiavello is our budy so Tommy gave him a call and got the EXCLUSIVE scoop! Plus Tommy and Tina share their love of Downton, arguing over becoming "dog-Sh*t" people, how Tina's dad handles dogs & problems, World Wrestling Nonsense and more!! This is one of those episodes that will have you wishing you had tighter jeans.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Don't you look at me like that!?! I'm just trying to impose on you and your family because I'm insane! Cats love BBQ sauce. It's true. If you want to win a cat over, feed it BBQ ribs with lots of sauce. The mommies confess shameful acts of the past - can you forgive them? We love when people stop BS'ing with the PC talk and start droppin F-bombs. Please do us a favor and cut the F'in S and just give us the F's and B's and the C's, you know what I'm sayin? Is anything worse than a co-worker? We think back on our office working days. Good lord do we feel for those of you who are still doing that. Drink water. Poop more.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever just done it in a parking lot on the pavement? Were you drunk? We are still Poly and Bi and loving it! Will Tom appreciate Christina's farts this week? The Cincy fart lives on. Tom insists that Christina is flirting with both their post man and a local Whole Foods Employee. A very sad dental update. Lots of mommy mail and a call from Top Dog!! Is it heaven on earth? No, it's just Your Mom's House! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Does it turn you on when you think of your spouse being filled with the love mustard of another man? We have the place for you. Our new poly, bi lifestyle isn't just for us. We want to share it with you and fluid bond with you.  SURPRISE - we have an improptu Top Dog call and it does NOT disappoint! Tommy's workout crushed him and he's seeking motivation. Plus we explore what is Amaze and that is the wonder of Dennis Rodman in a new documentary that chronicles his trip to North Korea.  KISS IT!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Oh jeans it's here! Your first NEW momisode of the NEW year. This one really delivers. Maybe it's us, maybe it's these jeans. We give you modern day philosopher, Plies. Tina has trouble deciphering his sounds, but once she gets it, she GETS it.  Plus we try to figure out what's up with Austin Uber drivers and all the different browns we had there.  Is there anything Steven Seagal doesn't know? Well, uh, that's a trick question. We jam out to a song that'll blow your mind. CP was inspired and now you'll be too. Raise a pair of pants up for this one!   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Oh Jeans can you see, that America is the best and loudest place in the world! Can you tell when an A1 US of A person is around? Let's break it down! If someone told you to Go F yourself, could you? Black Salami has something show the people who doubt that he can. WARNING, it's NSFHE - Not Safe For Human Eyes.  How does God do a new thang if he's still doin the same thang?!?!?! Momstralia/Australia speaks English...sort of. Can you understand this bloke? We have Dental Updates all around plus more from our favorite Dog Trainer, Peter Caine. Things are getting weirder. Big Shouts to Ontario, Canada for all the love this past week. That's some real nice denim you guys have up there. This episode will make you wish your peepee was stuck in Budder. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What hurts on you? Your what, your what, your what? That's nice, lady! As the Great Italian pornographer, Rocco says, "You must have both the passion and the chemistry and the focus and not know when the end is here for it to go with what is there." Understand? Peter Caine is our new hero. Don't you dare threaten him and don't EVER leave your dog with a friend. Friends are the worst. Bad songs are evidently existence in abundance. Thank you for filling our inbox with them. Is the Biggie/Beatles debate over? Nope! Who do you side with, Tina's super white/super lame explanation or Tom's hard and black and super real argument?  Gross sexual kinks are fascinating. Do you have one? Please share. And, you know what I'm sayin, we want that GENUINE "Gnam sayin" Know what we're saying? Bossa Nova forever! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices