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    110. “My boyfriend doesn’t care about money. Will I ever feel secure?”

    enJune 27, 2023

    Podcast Summary

    • Effective Communication in Money MattersClear and open communication is vital in managing money with a partner. Break down conversations to atomic levels to ensure understanding.

      Effective communication is crucial in managing money with a partner. The speaker shared his experience of bringing real couples on stage during his events to discuss their financial differences and indecisiveness. He emphasized that small decisions, like choosing a grocery store, can reflect larger money issues in relationships. In the shared conversation between Hannah and Jake, it was clear that Hannah had been communicating her expected income and increased rent payments for a long time, but Jake seemed caught off guard. The speaker suggested breaking down conversations to their atomic levels to ensure clear and effective communication. He also encouraged listeners to read his book, "I Will Teach You TO Be Rich," for answers to common money-related questions. Overall, the importance of open and clear communication in managing money with a partner cannot be overstated.

    • Understanding each other's approaches to managing moneyEffective communication and finding a balance that works for both partners are crucial in managing money in a relationship. Regularly discuss financial goals and methods to foster trust and fairness.

      Effective communication and understanding are key in managing money in a relationship. Jake and Hannah's conversation revealed that they have different approaches and comfort levels when it comes to managing their finances. Jake prefers keeping things simple and splitting expenses manually, while Hannah wants a more streamlined and automated system. Their discussion also highlighted their differing income levels and aspirations, which adds complexity to their financial situation. Ultimately, they realized that they need to find a balance that works for both of them and prioritizes open and honest communication. This may involve exploring different financial tools and methods, as well as reevaluating their individual and shared financial goals. The conversation underscores the importance of regularly discussing money matters and finding a system that fosters trust, ease, and fairness in the relationship.

    • Exploring unique travel experiences with ViatorViator offers diverse travel activities in 190+ countries with real reviews and flexible booking, enhancing travelers' experiences and providing peace of mind.

      There are platforms like Viator that offer a wide range of travel experiences in over 190 countries, making it easier for travelers to discover unique and memorable activities. Viator's real travel reviews and flexible booking options ensure a satisfying and hassle-free experience. Additionally, technology can improve our daily lives, such as the pod cover from 8 Sleep, which uses sensors to personalize temperature settings for individual sleep preferences. The conversation also touched upon the importance of trust, financial security, and living a fulfilling life, with one person expressing a desire for more flexibility to travel and experience new things without being overly reliant on money. Overall, the discussion emphasized the value of seeking out new experiences, trusting in technology to enhance our lives, and striving for personal growth and contentment.

    • Money dynamics in relationships: Priorities and perspectivesEffective communication and respecting each other's unique money priorities and perspectives are crucial for financial harmony in relationships.

      Money dynamics in relationships can be complex and influenced by various factors such as personal values, career choices, and feelings of guilt or contribution. In the discussion between Jake and Hannah, it became clear that they have different attitudes towards money and its role in their relationship. While Hannah prioritizes financial security, Jake is less concerned and values experiences over material wealth. Their disagreement over financial contributions stems from Jake's insistence on equal sharing, despite earning less. This dynamic can lead to stress and misunderstandings. To foster healthy money conversations and ensure both partners feel valued, it's essential to communicate openly about financial goals, values, and expectations. Additionally, recognizing and respecting each other's unique perspectives can help create a true partnership around money.

    • Understanding Relationships with WealthWealth can impact relationships, prioritize experiences or material aspects, and efficient tools can save time. Find balance and meaning in the pursuit of wealth.

      Wealth and the pursuit of it can lead to different perspectives and experiences for individuals. Some people may view wealth as a means to an end, focusing only on the material aspects, while others prioritize the experience and care behind acquiring wealth. This discussion highlights the importance of understanding one's own relationship with wealth and how it can impact relationships. Additionally, the use of efficient tools, like email software, can save significant time and streamline daily tasks. Peak Tea, as an example, offers a rich tea experience without the need for extensive preparation or time commitment. Overall, it's essential to find balance and meaning in our pursuit of wealth and to utilize resources that make our lives more enjoyable and productive.

    • Childhood experiences shape adult attitudes towards moneyAcknowledging and addressing childhood financial experiences can prevent negative impacts on present and future financial well-being.

      Childhood experiences with money can significantly impact our relationship with it in adulthood. The speaker grew up in a financially unstable environment, feeling responsible for managing money at a young age and shrinking herself to alleviate her mother's stress. These experiences instilled a deep-rooted fear of financial instability and lack of control. The speaker's past also influenced her current reluctance to combine finances in a relationship, as she fears enabling unhealthy financial habits and losing control. This conversation highlights the importance of acknowledging and addressing childhood financial experiences to prevent them from negatively impacting our present and future financial well-being.

    • People's complex relationship with moneyMoney brings feelings of excitement, security, and stress. Past experiences and childhood memories can affect one's relationship with it, leading to feelings of insecurity and fear. Understanding and supporting each other's unique financial perspectives is essential for healthy relationships.

      Money plays a significant role in people's lives, bringing up feelings of excitement, security, and stress. Hannah, who was excited about her upcoming career and the increased income it would bring, saw it as a means to gain more freedom and relaxation. However, her past experiences and childhood memories made her feel that she could never fully feel safe around money. Jake, on the other hand, understood Hannah's background but felt unsure of how to support her better. He acknowledged his own financial stress but didn't see it as a major concern at the moment. Overall, the conversation highlighted the complex relationship people have with money and the impact it can have on relationships.

    • Financial backgrounds and life stages impact relationshipsUnderstanding each other's financial backgrounds, values, and life stages is crucial for building a strong and compatible relationship. Open communication and compromise are key to navigating potential financial challenges.

      Financial compatibility and life stages can significantly impact relationships. Jake's young age and unpredictable schedule may cause financial and planning difficulties for Hannah. Parental influences on money management and values can shape individuals' attitudes towards finances. While some people may prioritize saving and planning, others might not care as much. Understanding these differences and having open communication can help couples navigate potential challenges. Hannah's feelings of uncertainty about their financial future and potential similarities to her parents' experiences highlight the importance of addressing these issues. Ultimately, it's essential to acknowledge and respect each other's financial backgrounds and values while striving for mutual understanding and compromise.

    • Pattern of indecisiveness in smaller matters reflects larger issuesCouple's constant Venmoing of small expenses and lack of decisiveness is preventing them from making progress towards financial goals and living a rich, fulfilling life together. They need to establish a clear savings plan, communicate effectively, and make decisions confidently to move forward.

      Hannah and Jake's inability to make decisions about smaller matters, such as grocery shopping, is reflective of a larger issue in their relationship - their inability to make decisions about more significant aspects of their lives, such as careers and finances. This pattern of behavior is keeping them from living a rich and fulfilling life together. They both desire to travel and invest in their future, but their constant Venmoing of small expenses and lack of decisiveness is preventing them from thinking and acting at a larger scale. To move forward, they need to establish a clear savings plan, communicate effectively about their financial goals, and make decisions confidently. This will allow them to start climbing towards a more fulfilling and financially stable future.

    • Challenges in expressing desires and aligning goalsTo build a strong relationship, effectively communicate individual goals and priorities, and find a balance between supporting each other's growth and maintaining harmony.

      Effective communication and alignment on goals are crucial in a relationship. The discussion between Jake and Hannah highlights the challenges they face in expressing their desires and timelines, leading to feelings of frustration and circular conversations. While they share similar long-term goals, they seem to differ in their sense of urgency and approach to achieving them. Jake is driven and focused on making progress, while Hannah has a more measured perspective, shaped by her past experiences and current responsibilities. To move forward, they need to have open and specific conversations about their individual goals and priorities, and find a way to support each other's growth while maintaining a balance in their relationship.

    • Effective communication and honesty in financial planningFind a partner with similar financial goals and values, have open conversations, take action on important tasks, and use tools like Zocdoc and Fabric by Gerber Life to make the process easier.

      Effective communication and honesty are crucial in a relationship, especially when it comes to financial planning. The speaker emphasizes that it's essential to find a partner who shares similar financial goals and values, rather than trying to change someone. She also suggests being open and having honest conversations about financial priorities and aspirations. Additionally, the speaker emphasizes the importance of taking action and not procrastinating on important financial tasks, such as getting life insurance or finding a doctor. She recommends using tools like Zocdoc to make finding a doctor more convenient and Fabric by Gerber Life to make getting life insurance quick and easy. Overall, the key takeaway is that taking small steps towards financial planning and communication can lead to significant improvements in both personal and relationship goals.

    • Save money on term life insurance with FabricFabric helps parents reduce fixed costs by obtaining term life insurance without a health exam, giving them more financial flexibility to save, invest, or spend.

      By using Fabric to quickly and easily obtain term life insurance without a health exam, parents can free up more money in their budgets. With lower fixed costs, they can then have more flexibility to save, invest, or spend on other things. For instance, in the discussed scenario, the couple was able to reduce their fixed costs from 83% to 44%, which significantly changed their financial situation and gave them more control over their life. This can lead to a substantial improvement in their socioeconomic status, allowing them to save, invest, or spend as they see fit.

    • Open communication and financial independence in relationshipsClearly communicate financial goals and plans, prioritize savings and investments, and strive for financial independence to build a secure and fulfilling relationship.

      The conversation between Jake and Hannah highlights the importance of open communication and financial independence in a relationship. Hannah expresses her desire for financial security and the freedom to pay for experiences she enjoys, while Jake is impressed by her investment habits and is comfortable contributing to shared expenses. By being clear and concise about their financial goals and plans, they are able to make decisions together and enjoy experiences without worrying about money. Their conversation also showcases the importance of having a well-thought-out spending plan, with investments and savings being prioritized. Overall, their discussion demonstrates a healthy approach to managing finances as a couple, allowing them to feel comfortable and secure in their relationship.

    • Having clear and concrete conversations about money is essential for a healthy relationshipClear money conversations lead to security, progress, and a strong relationship. Avoiding or having unclear discussions can lead to misunderstandings, stress, and anxiety.

      Having clear and concrete conversations about money, including budgets and financial goals, is essential for a healthy and successful relationship. As seen in the conversation between Jake and Hannah, when both parties are honest with themselves and each other about their financial situations and boundaries, it leads to a sense of security and progress. However, avoiding money conversations or having unclear and circular discussions can lead to misunderstandings, stress, and anxiety. It's important to approach money conversations with a clear plan and a willingness to work through any potential challenges. By doing so, couples can build the skills necessary for handling more complex financial decisions in the future. As the podcast host emphasized, these skills are crucial for achieving a "rich life" and maintaining a strong and fulfilling relationship.

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    Appearance by RAMIT SETHI
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    iwillteachyoutoberich.com

    @ramit
     
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    102. “If he doesn’t stop supporting our 31-year old son, we won’t be able to retire”

    102. “If he doesn’t stop supporting our 31-year old son, we won’t be able to retire”
    Janis and Michael have been married for 39 years. They share two adult children; the first is a therapist that recommended coming on the podcast. The second continues to take advantage of them financially. Their story is heartbreaking, totally unique—concerning, but far from hopeless.  This episode is brought to you by: Ness Well | IWT listeners can get an extra 5K welcome bonus when they apply for the Ness Card at https://nesswell.com/ramit. DeleteMe | If you want to get your personal information removed from the web, go to https://joindeleteme.com/ramit for 20% off. Methodology | Visit https://gomethodology.com/ramit for 10% off your first order of Methodology. All The Hacks | Check out All the Hacks by Chris Hutchins on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Your wallet will thank you later. Links mentioned in this episode • Download the Conscious Spending Plan Connect with Ramit • Get Money Coaching with Ramit  • Get my New York Times best-selling book • Get my no-numbers journal • Other episodes • Instagram • Twitter • YouTube If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here. Produced by Crate Media.

    What Makes a Great Leader Stand Out with Stephen M. R. Covey

    What Makes a Great Leader Stand Out with Stephen M. R. Covey
    On today’s episode of Here's Where It Gets Interesting, Sharon has a conversation with bestselling author Stephen M. R. Covey about effective leadership and high trust culture. The most underrated attribute in great leaders is humility which means that effective and trustworthy leaders are those who seek to understand first and be understood second. The working world has evolved since the start of the Covid pandemic and its leadership needs to reflect new practices built on the principles of “trust and inspire”. But what does good leadership in our communities and in our country look like? How can we apply the same principles about working leadership to leadership within our interpersonal relationships, and as we seek to lead change in our communities?

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