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    24: Oloni Spills her Best S*X TIPS, SPICY Relationships Advice & MORE!

    enSeptember 28, 2022

    Podcast Summary

    • Open communication about sex can strengthen parent-child relationshipsOpenly discussing sex with parents can lead to a deeper understanding and stronger bond between parents and children, despite unique family dynamics

      Open communication between children and their parents, even about sensitive topics like sex, can lead to a stronger and more understanding relationship. Yesiloni, a sex and relationships educator and author, shared her experience growing up in a Nigerian Christian household where there were no secrets. She spoke candidly about how she gradually introduced the topic of sex to her parents, who eventually became supportive of her work. Despite her openness online, she kept her personal life private from them. However, she noted that the boundary between her public and private life became blurred when her parents discovered her work. While she initially found it uncomfortable, she came to appreciate their support and encouragement. It's important to remember that every family dynamic is unique, and open communication may look different for different families. But ultimately, having open and honest conversations can lead to a deeper understanding and stronger bond between parents and children.

    • Exploring Sexual Liberation: Beyond the Physical ActUnderstand sex as a personal experience, not just a societal expectation. Seek education and explore pleasure for authentic sexual liberation.

      Sexual liberation is not just about having sex, but rather understanding what sex means to you and having a healthy relationship with it. This involves unlearning and relearning, and not feeling pressured to conform to societal expectations. The speaker shared her personal experiences of growing up with limited sex education and feeling like she was doing it for others, rather than for herself. She emphasized the importance of education and understanding the pleasure and enjoyment that comes with sex. The speaker also mentioned her experience giving a TED talk on the topic, which she had always wanted to do, despite being nervous. She encouraged everyone to explore their own sexuality and liberation in a way that feels authentic to them.

    • Exploring Sexual Education and Personal PreferencesAccurate and inclusive sex education is crucial, emphasizing individual preferences and respecting differences, while breaking free from societal pressures and misconceptions.

      Our discussions touched upon the importance of sexual education and understanding individual sexual preferences. The speaker shared her experiences with a contraceptive method that required dedication and the desire to learn about sex, leading her to write a book on the subject. She emphasized the need for accurate and inclusive sex education, free from societal pressures and misconceptions. The speaker also highlighted the importance of recognizing that everyone's sexual preferences and experiences are unique, and that it's essential to respect and understand these differences. Additionally, she discussed the complexities surrounding virginity and the societal expectations placed on individuals based on gender. The speaker's insights underscored the importance of open and honest conversations about sex, and the need for comprehensive, inclusive, and non-judgmental sex education.

    • Empowering Individuals to Make Informed Sexual DecisionsIndividuals should communicate openly, practice safe sex, respect partners, and prioritize their own health, pleasure, and well-being in sexual relationships.

      Individuals should feel empowered to make decisions about their own sexual experiences without fear of judgment or shame. The speaker shares her personal experiences of growing up and the societal pressures surrounding virginity and sexual activity. She encourages open communication about sexuality and emphasizes the importance of practicing safe sex and respecting one's partners. The speaker also highlights the double standard in society regarding men's and women's sexual experiences and the need to challenge these harmful attitudes. Ultimately, she encourages individuals to prioritize their own health, pleasure, and well-being in their sexual relationships.

    • Living with Herpes: A Common Condition with Minimal StigmaOne in five people carry HSV 1 or HSV 2, causing oral or genital herpes. Disclosing status and normalizing STIs can help reduce shame and embarrassment.

      Herpes, caused by the viruses HSV 1 and HSV 2, is more common than people might think, and having it doesn't mean an end to a satisfying sex life. HSV 1 is often associated with oral herpes or cold sores, while HSV 2 is linked to genital herpes. Estimates suggest that about 1 in 5 people carry one or both of these viruses. While it's important to get tested and disclose your status to partners, having herpes doesn't make you unworthy of love or sex. People get sick, and herpes is just another health condition. The speaker shared her experience of receiving a herpes diagnosis scare and how it would have been helpful to have seen or heard positive stories from people who have gone through it. The stigma surrounding sexually transmitted infections can make it difficult for people to discuss their experiences openly, but doing so can help normalize these conditions and reduce shame and embarrassment. The speaker also promoted Babbel, a language learning platform, as a sponsor of the podcast.

    • Discussing Women's Pleasure in Sex EducationWomen's pleasure should be included in sex education, focusing on communication, understanding, and exploring various ways to achieve orgasms. Normalizing all sexual preferences and fostering open conversations can lead to more satisfying experiences for all genders.

      Sex education should be more comprehensive and inclusive of women's pleasure, as many women have faked orgasms due to a lack of understanding and communication around the subject. The conversation revealed that women are often taught about male pleasure and penetration, but not about their own orgasms or the various ways they can be achieved. Additionally, the importance of communication and finding one's voice in sexual experiences was emphasized, as it allows individuals to express their desires and needs, leading to more satisfying encounters. The conversation also touched upon the normalization of various kinks and fetishes, and the distinction between the two. Overall, the discussion highlighted the need for more open and honest conversations about sex and pleasure for all genders.

    • Understanding the Differences Between Kinks and FetishesCommunicate openly with your partner about kinks and fetishes, and ensure ongoing consent for a safe and enjoyable sexual experience.

      While the terms "kink" and "fetish" are often used interchangeably, they have distinct meanings. A kink refers to sexual activities that help stimulate arousal, while a fetish is something that someone is deeply attracted to or enjoys, regardless of its arousal value. When exploring new sexual experiences with a partner, it's essential to communicate openly and ask for consent. This can be done in a comfortable and natural way, such as sharing a book or podcast about different kinks and fetishes, or having an honest conversation before engaging in sexual activity. Consent is not just about the beginning of sex but should be an ongoing conversation throughout the experience. By understanding the differences between kinks and fetishes and communicating openly with your partner, you can create a safe and enjoyable sexual experience for both parties.

    • Understanding and Embracing Your SexualityIdentify the root cause, communicate with your partner, be confident, educate yourself, respect boundaries, and explore desires in a consensual and respectful way.

      Being uncomfortable with your sexuality is normal, but it's important to identify the root cause and find ways to embrace it. Communication with your partner is crucial, and it's essential to be with someone who supports and respects your sexuality. Confidence in oneself is attractive, but it's essential not to emasculate or intimidate your partner. Women have the right to educate themselves about sex and pleasure, and it doesn't always have to be centered around men's needs. The hate received from some men is a result of their discomfort with a confident woman teaching other women about self-pleasure and sex that prioritizes women's happiness and agency. Ultimately, it's important to remember that sex is a personal experience, and everyone should feel empowered to explore their desires and boundaries in a consensual and respectful way.

    • Exploring new ways to enhance your sex lifeDiscover new pleasures through sex toys, audio erotica, fantasizing, and ethical porn. Keep an open mind and prioritize consent and respect.

      Improving the quality of one's sex life is important, whether it's within a relationship or not. People can get too comfortable with their sexual routines and need to mix things up. Sex toys can be a great addition, but it's essential to use them in moderation and not rely on them exclusively. Discovering new ways to experience pleasure, such as audio erotica or fantasizing, can also help keep things exciting. It's important to be mindful of the type of porn we consume and consider ethical options that respect the rights and boundaries of sex workers. Overall, keeping an open mind and exploring new sexual experiences can lead to a more fulfilling and satisfying sex life. Additionally, taking care of one's skin is crucial for feeling confident and attractive. Skin and Me offers personalized skincare solutions that cater to individual needs and concerns, ensuring that customers can achieve their dream skin. Using the code "grace" will get you your first month for only £3.50 instead of £24.99.

    • Open communication about sexual concerns and issuesEffective communication leads to healthier, more satisfying sexual relationships. Discuss matters openly and respectfully, understand consent, use protection, and be aware of personal comfort levels.

      Effective communication is crucial in addressing various sexual concerns and issues. Whether it's about orgasms, sex drives, or boundaries, discussing these matters openly and respectfully with your partner can lead to a healthier and more satisfying sexual relationship. Additionally, understanding the importance of consent, using protection, and being aware of personal comfort levels are essential aspects of sexual health and pleasure. Lastly, remember that everyone's experiences and preferences are unique, and it's essential to be patient, understanding, and accepting of these differences.

    • Tips for Satisfying and Safe Sexual ExperiencesCommunicate openly, prepare with lubricant, positive feedback, and sex-positive surroundings, understand your body, and take necessary precautions for first-time or new experiences.

      Communication and preparation are key to having satisfying and safe sexual experiences. Here are some specific tips: 1. Use plenty of lubricant for anal sex to avoid injury and discomfort. 2. Start with a comfortable position for both partners. 3. Use positive communication when giving feedback to your partner about their sex techniques. 4. Use lube during oral sex for a more enjoyable experience. 5. Surround yourself with sex-positive people and avoid sharing sexual details with those who may criticize or judge. 6. Consider trying new things outside of traditional bedroom settings, but be aware of potential risks and limitations. 7. If you're a virgin or have not been tested, make sure to take necessary precautions before having sex for the first time. 8. Understand your own body and preferences, and communicate them clearly to your partner. 9. Be open to trying new techniques or methods to avoid razor bumps when shaving. 10. Remember that everyone has different experiences and preferences, so don't compare yourself to others or let their opinions impact your own sexual confidence.

    • Respect boundaries and communicate effectively during sexual experiencesRespect partner's boundaries, address body odor concerns, introduce sex toys, focus on technique and understanding, and ensure sex is pain-free

      Communication and understanding are key in sexual experiences. Regarding virginity, it's important to respect boundaries and let the other person feel comfortable. If you're insecure about body odor, consider getting a checkup from a gynecologist to put your mind at ease. Introducing sex toys can add excitement to the bedroom, and it's essential to have open conversations about it. Size doesn't always matter; it's the technique and understanding of your partner's preferences that make a difference. Lastly, sex should never be painful, and if it is, it's crucial to address the issue with a healthcare professional.

    • Exploring new ways to keep sex life exciting in long-term relationshipsCommunicate openly, boost confidence, and experiment with role play, lingerie, video sex, sex games, toys for a spicier sex life in long-term relationships.

      Keeping the sex life entertaining in a long-term relationship requires creativity and confidence. Role playing, wearing lingerie, video sex, sex games, and exploring toys are some ways to introduce spice into the bedroom. Confidence is key, as both partners should feel comfortable and proud of their bodies. Practicing self-pleasure and communication with a partner are essential for understanding one's own pleasure and teaching a partner how to satisfy those needs. Toys can be an important tool in this journey, and seeking advice from sales associants can be helpful for those new to the world of sex toys. In summary, keeping the sex life exciting in a long-term relationship involves open communication, confidence, and a willingness to try new things.

    • Speak up for sexual satisfactionHonesty, assertiveness, and open communication enhance sexual experiences. Prioritize pleasure and discuss what feels good or not.

      Open communication and honesty are key to improving sexual experiences. According to the discussion, it's important to speak up about what feels good and what doesn't, rather than continuing with unsatisfying sex. Honesty also extends to acknowledging when things aren't working and encouraging improvement. The conversation also touched on the importance of finding one's sexual voice and being assertive in the bedroom. Additionally, the discussion highlighted the importance of charging sex toys properly and being open to exploring different roles in the bedroom. The overall message was to prioritize pleasure and communication in sexual experiences.

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