Caring What Others Think Is A Deep Black Hole

The main reason why most of us are afraid of being alone is that we will have to spend time with our thoughts, and in addition, we will have to face our demons. We rarely realize that being alone is also an opportunity to learn to love ourselves, be aware of what we want and need in our lives and build boundaries based on that. When we do that, we will be better positioned to start a new relationship and in peace, if we decide to stay alone.

Tune in and find out what are the benefits of daring the be alone.

Let's get into it:

Timestamps

Why we need to learn to live without guilt [00:03:00] 

What happens when we decide to be alone [00:06:00] 

How I learned to face my demons [00:09:00] 

Why finding self-love is essential [00:12:00]

The importance of changing our mindset to redirect our thoughts [00:15:00] 

Links

Book: Kamal Ravikant - Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends on It 

15-Minute Clarity Call

https://msgsndr.com/widget/booking?calendar=kcpWfO0ij7Aq2u4TzFEk

My book: The Jelly Bean Jar - Empowering Independence through Divorce

https://tanyasomerton.com/shop/the-jelly-bean-jar/

Join my Free Facebook Group here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceangel/

Divorce Roadmap Session:

https://tanyasomerton.com/divorce-roadmap/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Many of us are looking for a new life; we are looking to change everything around us, and for some reason, we can't. One of those reasons might be the fear of the unknown, and it is understandable. Our brain's main task is to keep us alive, and everything new looks dangerous; familiar environments feel safe, so our brain will try to keep us there as long as possible. 

In this episode, we will talk about how to discover a new side of ourselves. We will learn how important it is to let go of control to grow and thrive.

Let's get into it:

Timestamps

How I started my journey of rediscovering myself [00:03:00] 

The different types of divorced people [00:06:00] 

What control can do to us [00:09:00]

About my curious nature and where it led me [00:12:00] 

One of my first dives. A life-changing experience [00:15:00] 

How losing control open all kind of doors to me [00:18:00] 

Links

15-Minute Clarity Call

https://msgsndr.com/widget/booking?calendar=kcpWfO0ij7Aq2u4TzFEk

My book: The Jelly Bean Jar - Empowering Independence through Divorce

https://tanyasomerton.com/shop/the-jelly-bean-jar/

Join my Free Facebook Group here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceangel/

Divorce Roadmap Session:

https://tanyasomerton.com/divorce-roadmap/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The way we respond to what happens to us depends on how we were moulded to be. The tools we have available are either the ones we got from our parents or those we picked up along the way. But what if those tools are not the ones we need to be who we really are meant to be? How can we build something that can't be made with the tools we have? 

In this episode, we will understand who we are, why we behave the way we do, and the best way of changing that and rediscovering who we are meant to be. 

Let's get into it:

Timestamps

How we start getting moulded in our childhood [00:03:00]

We get to colour our book with the pencils we were given [00:06:00] 

What makes us feel complete [00:09:00] 

Realizing that we must stop repeating our habits [00:12:00] 

Wearing the brightest clothes [00:15:00] 

We must stop telling ourselves we are not good enough [00:18:00] 

Links

15-Minute Clarity Call

https://msgsndr.com/widget/booking?calendar=kcpWfO0ij7Aq2u4TzFEk

My book: The Jelly Bean Jar - Empowering Independence through Divorce

https://tanyasomerton.com/shop/the-jelly-bean-jar/

Join my Free Facebook Group here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceangel/

Divorce Roadmap Session:

https://tanyasomerton.com/divorce-roadmap/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Choosing the right person for advice during our divorce could be the difference between having an amicable separation or living a nightmare. 

In this episode, we will talk about who we seek advice from when going through a divorce. We will talk about why we should avoid listening to people who are not in the place we want to go or those who never went through a similar situation in their lives. 

Let's get into it:

Timestamps

Why some people make the mistake of offering help even when they can't help much [00:03:00] 

What should someone who wants to help do when asked for advice [00:06:00] 

Why contacting a professional can offer a whole different perspective [00:09:00] 

What is the agenda of those helping us? [00:11:00] 

Links

15-Minute Clarity Call

https://msgsndr.com/widget/booking?calendar=kcpWfO0ij7Aq2u4TzFEk

My book: The Jelly Bean Jar - Empowering Independence through Divorce

https://tanyasomerton.com/shop/the-jelly-bean-jar/

Join my Free Facebook Group here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceangel/

Divorce Roadmap Session:

https://tanyasomerton.com/divorce-roadmap/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

It might happen that our ex-spouse did or said something that hurt us, and even after some time, we can't get over it. And we might even be in our right of feeling wounded but, if we don't let it go and learn to forgive, we'll stay trapped in anger or resentment. The thing is, whatever we think or feel about others is a reflection of how we think of ourselves. That is why it is massively important to learn to like ourselves. 

In this episode, we will talk about the secret of becoming lovable again, letting go of what is hurting us, and learning to like ourselves. 

Let's get into it:

My experience living in a place of bitterness and anguish [00:03:00] 

What happens when we stop trusting ourselves [00:06:00] 

Why we shouldn't worry about filling somebody else's expectations about us [00:09:00]

The importance of controlling the negative narrative in our heads [00:10:00]

Links

15-Minute Clarity Call

https://msgsndr.com/widget/booking?calendar=kcpWfO0ij7Aq2u4TzFEk

My book: The Jelly Bean Jar - Empowering Independence through Divorce

https://tanyasomerton.com/shop/the-jelly-bean-jar/

Join my Free Facebook Group here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceangel/

Divorce Roadmap Session:

https://tanyasomerton.com/divorce-roadmap/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

When someone asks us how are we doing, we usually answer everything is okay, even when it is not. For whatever reason, we tend to hide our feelings, not accepting them, denying them, in a way. 

In this episode, we will talk about the effects that practice can have on our lives and, most importantly, our future. I want to invite you to know the benefits of walking through your feelings. 

Let's get into it:

Timestamps

Not everyone gets through a divorce in the same way [00:03:00]  

Why we tend to hide our feelings from people [00:06:00]

What happens when we get stuck in what could've done different [00:09:00] 

My mother's lesson about love and the jellybeans jar [00:12:00] 

The questions we need to ask ourselves [00:15:00] 

It's okay to let go [00:18:00]

Links

15-Minute Clarity Call

https://msgsndr.com/widget/booking?calendar=kcpWfO0ij7Aq2u4TzFEk

My book: The Jelly Bean Jar - Empowering Independence through Divorce

https://tanyasomerton.com/shop/the-jelly-bean-jar/

Join my Free Facebook Group here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceangel/

Divorce Roadmap Session:

https://tanyasomerton.com/divorce-roadmap/

Book: David R. Hawkins - Letting Go: The Pathway of Surrender

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Letting go when we are going throw a divorce is perhaps one of its most complex parts. And not only let go of assets and lifestyle but also people. It is a painful process, and it is entirely normal to feel sad, and it is perfectly understandable to mourn all our losses. But we need to be careful of not getting stuck in that mourning; we need to learn how to move from that place. 

In this episode, we will discuss the importance of giving ourselves time to mourn and a deadline to stop doing it. 

Let's get into it:

Timestamps:

A few of my ex-husband's stories [4:59]

How it was for me the internal growth process [6:09]

What are the things that hold us back [9:03]

The rewards we get and what they are valuable for us [11:08]

The incredible story of the women that acted as a connector between two families [14:38]

Links

Restore Me - Waiting List

https://www.tanyasomerton.com/RMWaitList

15-Minute Clarity Call

https://msgsndr.com/widget/booking?calendar=kcpWfO0ij7Aq2u4TzFEk

My book: The Jelly Bean Jar - Empowering Independence through Divorce

https://tanyasomerton.com/shop/the-jelly-bean-jar/

Join my Free Facebook Group here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceangel/

Divorce Roadmap Session:

https://tanyasomerton.com/divorce-roadmap/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Wanting always more and working hard to get better is a worthy journey all of us should embark on. But sometimes, it can be a dangerous trip; we might get too attached to an outcome. Attachment can be tricky; it can cloud our judgement and make us get stuck. It can also happen with people; we might get too emotionally attached to someone, which is never the best option. 

In this episode, we will talk about how helpful it is to let go and ground the construction of our happiness in ourselves, not on a determined outcome or person. 

Let's get into it:

Timestamps

Making big decisions based on our happiness [00:03:00] 

All of us can find happiness [00:06:00] 

Attachment is what causes most of our problems [00:09:00] 

The expectations of what we think we should receive [00:12:00] 

Appreciating each moment of our lives [00:15:00]

Links

Book: David R. Hawkins - Letting Go: The Pathway of Surrender

Restore Me - Waiting List

https://www.tanyasomerton.com/RMWaitList

15-Minute Clarity Call

https://msgsndr.com/widget/booking?calendar=kcpWfO0ij7Aq2u4TzFEk

My book: The Jelly Bean Jar - Empowering Independence through Divorce

https://tanyasomerton.com/shop/the-jelly-bean-jar/

Join my Free Facebook Group here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceangel/

Divorce Roadmap Session:

https://tanyasomerton.com/divorce-roadmap/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

One of the things I see many clients struggle with and something I've struggled with myself during my divorce is the fear of losing status. The car we drive, the school our kids attend, our lifestyle, in general, might be unsustainable by our own means after the divorce. The fear of losing all that might make us prolong a relationship that is already over, causing us extreme pain. 

In this episode, we will talk about why taking that decision is so painful and what we can expect once we decide to shape our future.

Let's get into it:

Timestamps

Losing status never looks good at the beginning [00:03:00] 

A little story about how my status "changed" right now [00:06:00] 

What an old car can show us about ourselves [00:09:00] 

The void of keeping our status regardless of our unhappiness [00:12:00] 

All of us have a choice to make [00:15:00] 

Links

Restore Me - Waiting List

https://www.tanyasomerton.com/RMWaitList

15-Minute Clarity Call

https://msgsndr.com/widget/booking?calendar=kcpWfO0ij7Aq2u4TzFEk

My book: The Jelly Bean Jar - Empowering Independence through Divorce

https://tanyasomerton.com/shop/the-jelly-bean-jar/

Join my Free Facebook Group here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceangel/

Divorce Roadmap Session:

https://tanyasomerton.com/divorce-roadmap/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

When we think about the story of our divorce, we need to understand that in most cases is much more than what we believe, think, or feel that happened and ended our marriage. Those stories could be a prison and what holds us back and won't let us move forward. 

And some stories might be sayings from our parents or siblings when we were growing up, and we carry them around as truths without questioning them. In today's episode, we will talk about how our stories can hold us back and keep us as hostages. 

Let's get into it:

Timestamps

The effect of happiness in our lives [00:03:00]

Some of the stories I carried for years about money [00:06:00] 

What going through the emotions of our divorce can do to us [00:09:00] 

You can start your new life tomorrow [00:12:00] 

Links 

Restore Me - Waiting List

https://www.tanyasomerton.com/RMWaitList

15-Minute Clarity Call

https://msgsndr.com/widget/booking?calendar=kcpWfO0ij7Aq2u4TzFEk

My book: The Jelly Bean Jar - Empowering Independence through Divorce

https://tanyasomerton.com/shop/the-jelly-bean-jar/

Join my Free Facebook Group here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceangel/

Divorce Roadmap Session:

https://tanyasomerton.com/divorce-roadmap/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.