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    E666 Ask Nick - My Gay BFF Is in Love With Me

    enNovember 13, 2023

    Podcast Summary

    • Filing the FAFSA form for college financial aidHigh school seniors and their families should file the FAFSA form for potential scholarships and grants, with a simplified process of only 36 questions.

      Filling out the FAFSA form for college financial aid is a crucial first step for high school seniors and their families, regardless of academic or athletic achievements. The process is simpler than ever, with only 36 questions, and can potentially result in thousands of dollars in scholarships and grants. Meanwhile, for those looking to furnish their homes, Article offers stylish and comfortable designs at affordable prices. As for the team at The Vowel Files, they recently welcomed Ali back from her move to Minneapolis, where she's experimenting with a new living situation while cherishing the memories of her time with the team and her beloved office dog, Kiki.

    • Cost-effective car shipping during long-distance movesShipping a car during a move can save money compared to driving it yourself. Maintain open communication in relationships to navigate crushes or attractions.

      Shipping a car during a long-distance move can be more cost-effective than driving it yourself, despite initial assumptions. This was a surprise for Ali when she compared the costs of driving and shipping for her own move. Additionally, the Twin Cities of Minneapolis and Saint Paul, while often considered as one, each have unique histories and characteristics. Regarding relationships, it's normal for married individuals to experience crushes or attractions outside their marriage. However, it's essential to communicate openly with your partner about your feelings and intentions. In the case of the married woman in the discussion, she can seek her coworker's help with her running goals while maintaining professional boundaries. Ultimately, it's important to prioritize the bond and communication within the marriage.

    • Prioritize communication and connection in long-term relationshipsCommunication and connection are key to maintaining a strong bond in long-term relationships. Don't take them for granted and work on addressing any issues to prevent feelings of disconnection or attraction to others.

      It's important for individuals in long-term relationships to prioritize communication and connection with their partners instead of seeking validation or excitement outside of the relationship. The discussion highlights how easily people can take their relationships for granted and how a shared interest or chemistry can be temporary and not the foundation of a strong bond. Instead, actively working on the relationship and addressing any issues can help reignite the spark and prevent feelings of disconnection or attraction to others. It's crucial to remember that relationships require effort and prioritization to remain healthy and fulfilling.

    • Maintaining a healthy relationship requires open communicationCommunicate openly with your partner, set boundaries, and work through challenges together to strengthen your connection.

      Communication is key in maintaining a healthy and fulfilling relationship. When feelings of disconnection or dissatisfaction arise, it's essential to have open and honest conversations with your partner instead of seeking validation or attention outside of the relationship. Crushes or attractions to others may seem innocent, but they can lead to compromising situations and ultimately harm the commitment and trust within a relationship. Instead, focus on setting boundaries, communicating expectations, and working through challenges together. Remember, every long-term relationship goes through ups and downs, but it's the couples who care and prioritize their connection that make it work. So, before things get worse, address the issues at hand and recommit to your relationship.

    • Approaching Complex Relationships with Empathy and UnderstandingWhen dealing with complex relationship situations, approach with empathy, understand the individuals involved, and consider the larger context.

      When dealing with complex relationship situations, it's important to approach the situation with empathy and understanding, rather than trying to pick a winner or loser. In the case of Julie and her gay best friend, she's been dealing with his confessions of love for her, despite him never having confessed it to her directly. The friend has a complicated past, having faced hate crimes and societal pressure for being gay. Julie has chosen to ignore the situation, as it doesn't affect her directly and her friend is sensitive. However, the friend continues to express his feelings to others and Julie finds it uncomfortable. It's unclear what steps, if any, Julie should take in this situation. The key takeaway is to approach the situation with compassion and understanding, and to consider the larger context and complexities of the individuals involved.

    • Friends dealing with unrequited feelingsEmpathize with friends dealing with unrequited feelings, remember it's temporary, and approach the situation with open communication if necessary.

      Friendships based on open communication and authenticity can be tested when one friend harbors unspoken feelings towards another. In this case, a friend's unrequited feelings for someone in their friend group may cause discomfort and uncertainty, but it's essential to remember that the friend in question is likely dealing with deeper personal issues. They might be in a tough spot and may be clinging to the idea of being with this person as a way to feel accepted and loved. It's important to approach the situation with empathy and understanding, recognizing that crushes don't last forever, and the friend may eventually move on. However, if the situation becomes too awkward or uncomfortable, it might be necessary to have an open and honest conversation with the friend group about the issue. Ultimately, it's essential to remember that everyone goes through challenging times, and sometimes, we can be very convincing to ourselves about the solutions that we think will make us happy.

    • Friend's Confusing SignalsFriend's conflicting feelings and behavior towards the speaker raises concerns about his mental health and requires careful consideration and support from their friend group.

      The speaker's friend has expressed romantic feelings towards her, but she is unsure how to proceed due to his troubled behavior and conflicting statements about his sexuality. The friend has confessed his feelings to multiple people in their friend group, causing confusion and awkwardness. The speaker feels uncomfortable around him and wonders if his fantasy of being with her is fueled by his desire to be with a woman rather than a deep connection with her. The friend's behavior raises concerns about his mental health and happiness, and the speaker and their friend group must decide how to support him while setting boundaries. It's important to approach the situation with empathy and understanding, but also recognize that the friend's actions and words may require intervention for his own well-being.

    • Supporting a friend through personal strugglesEncourage open, empathetic conversations. Model positive dating attitudes. Seek professional help if necessary.

      While it's natural for friends to care about each other's well-being, it can be challenging to know when and how to intervene when a friend is struggling with personal issues, especially if there's a mutual crush involved. In this situation, it seems that the friend group cares deeply about their friend and wants to support him, but they're unsure of how to approach his self-destructive lifestyle and unhealthy fixation on one friend in particular. The friend group could consider having a gentle and empathetic but direct conversation with their friend about his struggles, acknowledging his pain while also expressing concern for his well-being. It's important to remember that the friend is not the only one at risk and that it's okay to set boundaries, such as not discussing dating issues with him or speaking negatively about one's dating life around him. If the friend is unwilling to address his issues directly, the friend group could focus on modeling positive attitudes towards dating and relationships. They could also consider having a group intervention to express their love and concern for their friend, while also encouraging him to seek professional help. Ultimately, it's important for friends to prioritize their own well-being while also being supportive and empathetic towards their friends. It's not always easy to know what the right thing to do is, but having open and honest conversations can go a long way in helping a friend through difficult times.

    • Friend's romantic interest in a friend's partnerFriends should support personal growth but not cross boundaries or make others uncomfortable. Encourage friends to focus on their own growth and seek professional help if needed.

      It's important to support friends in their personal growth, but not at the expense of making others uncomfortable or crossing boundaries. In the discussed situation, a friend's behavior of expressing romantic interest in a female friend while she is dating can create an uncomfortable dynamic. The friend group can address this issue by making it clear that such behavior is not acceptable and encouraging the friend to focus on his own personal growth instead of trying to manipulate situations. The friend can be encouraged to seek professional help, such as therapy, to work through his struggles with dating and self-confidence. Ultimately, it's important for friends to communicate openly and respectfully to maintain healthy and supportive relationships.

    • Addressing uncomfortable situations in friend groupsHandle uncomfortable situations with grace, empathy, and open communication. Seek help if needed, and remember that friendships come in various forms. Effective communication tools can support the process.

      When dealing with uncomfortable situations in friend groups, it's essential to address the issue with grace and empathy, prioritizing open communication and transparency. Therapy may be necessary for individuals involved, and friendships can evolve and change. It's important to remember that friendships come in various forms, and some are based on deeper connections and the ability to handle difficult conversations. If friends become upset over how a situation is handled, it may be time to reevaluate those friendships. The process of seeking help, such as therapy or using resources like BetterHelp, can be made easier with user-friendly platforms and quick access to qualified professionals. Effective communication tools like Grammarly can also support individuals in expressing themselves clearly and efficiently. Overall, handling uncomfortable situations requires courage, empathy, and the willingness to prioritize authentic connections.

    • Balancing Business and RelationshipsEffective communication, reassurance, and prioritizing the relationship can help bridge the gap when one partner's business demands consume their time and energy, leaving the other feeling neglected.

      Utilizing AI writing tools like Grammarly can significantly enhance your writing experience by streamlining the process, helping you get started, and polishing up your work. However, in relationships, clear communication and prioritization are essential. Melissa's concern is that her boyfriend's business is consuming all his time and energy, leaving her feeling neglected and uncertain about their future. Despite understanding the immense pressure and stress of starting a business, it's unfair for Melissa to be in a relationship with no clear answers about the future. Effective communication, reassurance, and prioritizing the relationship can help bridge the gap and ensure both partners feel valued and supported.

    • Openness and transparency in relationshipsClear communication and understanding of each other's goals and expectations are essential for a healthy relationship. Encourage open dialogue to avoid feelings of resentment and uncertainty.

      Communication and transparency are crucial in a relationship. The speaker expressed feelings of resentment towards her partner due to his lack of openness about his plans and priorities, leaving her uncertain about their future together. Despite his business commitments, she believes he should make time for deeper conversations and make her feel valued. The relationship dynamic, as it stands, leaves her feeling like a weekend girlfriend with minimal emotional investment. To move forward, the speaker encourages open dialogue and a clearer understanding of each other's goals and expectations.

    • Expecting transparency and communication in relationshipsClear communication and certainty are essential in relationships, and partners should prioritize and invest in each other as they would in any important decision or commitment.

      Communication and transparency are crucial in any relationship, especially when it comes to discussing important decisions and future plans. In this situation, the speaker feels that her partner, who is focused on his career, is not providing her with the information and assurances she needs to feel valued and prioritized in their relationship. The speaker believes that if she were in his position, she would make important decisions about her business with clear communication and certainty, and she expects the same level of commitment and openness from her partner. Ultimately, the speaker may need to consider breaking up with him if he cannot provide her with the level of transparency and commitment she requires. It's important for both partners to understand that relationships require investment and prioritization, just like any other important decision or commitment in life.

    • Expressing Unmet Emotional Needs in a RelationshipIf your partner doesn't prioritize your emotional needs, communicate assertively and consider if the relationship is worth continuing. Write a clear letter to express your feelings and potentially lead to a productive conversation or a breakup, ensuring it's genuine.

      If your partner is not meeting your emotional needs and refuses to acknowledge or prioritize them, you may need to assertively communicate your feelings and consider whether the relationship is worth continuing. The conversation may be uncomfortable, but it's essential to express your dissatisfaction and convey that you deserve more than minimal attention. If your partner is unable or unwilling to give you what you need, it might be time to reevaluate the relationship and consider whether you should continue investing your time and energy into it. Writing a clear and matter-of-fact letter can help articulate your feelings and potentially lead to a productive conversation or, if necessary, a breakup. However, it's crucial to ensure that any breakup is genuine and not a fake one, as staying in a situationship or settling for minimal interaction is not a healthy or fulfilling solution.

    • When a relationship isn't prioritized, it might be time to move onRecognize when a partner doesn't prioritize you, define relationship terms, and prioritize self-worth to make positive changes

      If you're in a relationship where your partner isn't prioritizing you, it might be time to consider breaking up and moving on. This can be a difficult decision, but it's important to recognize that access to each other should be removed when a relationship ends. The person you're with should see the value in being a better partner and making you a priority. If they don't, they may not be the right person for you. It's also important to remember that there are tools available to help make the most of your time and money, such as TodayTix for entertainment and Drizly for drink delivery. In the relationship context, it's crucial to hold your partner accountable and not let them take your power and strength for granted. They may not come around, but it's essential to define the terms of the relationship on your own terms and have the conviction to stick to them. Overall, it's important to prioritize yourself and make the most of your time and resources. Whether it's in relationships or in finding great deals on shows and drinks, remember that you have the power to make positive changes in your life.

    • The illusion of false validationBe aware of the intentions of others and trust your instincts in relationships to avoid being left confused and hurt by false validation.

      Sometimes people may lead us on and make us believe they feel strongly for us, only to suddenly disappear. This can leave us feeling confused, hurt, and chasing after validation. In the case of Alana, she was pursued by her ex, who went to great lengths to convince her that they were meant to be together. However, he ultimately ended the relationship abruptly, leaving Alana feeling shocked and betrayed. It's important to recognize when our ego is being fed false validation and to be honest with ourselves about the reality of the situation. While it may be tempting to hold on to the hope that the person will come back, it's essential to focus on moving forward and finding fulfillment within ourselves. In the end, Alana's experience served as a reminder that it's crucial to be aware of the intentions of others and to trust our instincts when it comes to relationships.

    • Avoiding inconsistent relationshipsRecognize and avoid relationships based on ego and validation, seek out individuals who are clear about their intentions and consistent in their actions.

      Engaging in a relationship with someone who is inconsistent and unreliable can lead to emotional turmoil and waste valuable time. The speaker in this conversation shared her experience with a man who confessed his love one day but acted indifferently the next. Despite their proximity and history, she made the decision to end the pattern of reacting to his actions and instead, asserted her worth and independence. In essence, it's crucial to recognize and avoid relationships that are based on ego and validation, and instead, seek out individuals who are clear about their intentions and consistent in their actions.

    • Investing in Relationship DramaRecognize unhealthy relationships, prioritize personal happiness, communicate openly, build self-confidence, and let go of the past.

      Relationships, especially in our early twenties, can sometimes lead us to invest our time in drama. It's natural to make mistakes and have moments of weakness, but it's important to recognize if we want to continue being invested in that drama or not. It's not easy to distance ourselves from someone we have feelings for, but it's crucial to prioritize our own happiness and growth. People, especially in their twenties, can be selfish and focus on their own needs, but it's essential to communicate openly and honestly about our feelings and intentions. Building self-confidence and knowing our worth are key to attracting healthy relationships and avoiding unnecessary drama. Ultimately, it's up to us to make the decision to let go of the past and focus on our personal growth.

    • Focus on personal growth for the right partnerInvest in yourself, prioritize mental, physical, and emotional health, pursue passions, and become a confident, self-assured person to attract the right partner.

      Focusing on personal growth and self-improvement is key to attracting the right partner. By investing in yourself, your mental, physical, and emotional health, and pursuing your passions, you become a confident, self-assured person. Men are naturally drawn to such individuals, and the chase adds to the appeal. It's essential to remember that being single and focusing on oneself is not a sign of failure, but rather an opportunity to grow and prepare for a healthy, fulfilling relationship. Don't make finding a partner your top priority; instead, be open to meeting new people while focusing on your personal development. Trust that the right person will come along when you least expect it.

    • Prioritizing Your Future Self for Long-Term HappinessFocus on your own growth and happiness, consider long-term implications, and avoid relying solely on validation from others.

      Prioritizing your future self is crucial for making decisions that will bring long-term happiness. This means asking yourself why you're making certain choices, considering how you'll feel about them tomorrow, and focusing on your own growth. It can be difficult to break free from patterns of instant gratification, but with self-awareness and a commitment to prioritizing yourself, you can build momentum and make choices that serve your best interests. Additionally, it's important to remember that validation from others, whether through relationships or social interactions, should not be the sole source of happiness. Instead, focus on investing in yourself, your community, and your friends. Be busy and unavailable, and trust that the more you prioritize yourself, the greater your chances of finding love and happiness will be. So, if you find yourself in a situationship or unsure about reaching your ex, take a pause and ask yourself if the choice you're making will bring happiness in the long run. Remember, you don't need anyone else to make you feel special or happy – you have the power to create happiness for yourself.

    • Don't miss out on $1,000 for your child's education by not filling out the FAFSAComplete the FAFSA to potentially secure up to $1,000 in scholarships and financial aid for your child's education. The process is simple, consisting of only 36 questions. Create federal student aid accounts, get your FSA IDs, and fill out the form together.

      Families could be missing out on up to $1,000 in scholarships and financial aid for their child's education just by not completing the Free Application for Federal Student Aid (FAFSA). Contrary to popular belief, academic excellence or athletic prowess are not the only qualifiers. The application process is simpler than ever, consisting of only 36 questions. To begin, create federal student aid accounts for both you and your child to obtain your FSA IDs. Once you have these, sit down together and fill out the form. Don't let the opportunity to help finance your child's future pass you by. Take the first step and fill out the FAFSA today. Start the process at fafsa.gov/fafsainfo.

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    00:00 - Intro
    03:19 - Household Headlines
    08:08 - Famous Wife
    14:50 - The Wives
    17:08 - Oh Brother
    21:53 - Space and Oceans
    26:07 - Childhood Shows and Cars
    31:33 - Moving
    33:35 - Nepo Babies
    35:39 - Love Island
    50:18 - Loans
    55:40 - Welcome
    01:03:08 - Vanderpump
    01:17:42 - The Valley
    01:21:30 - Guests
    01:25:11 - Bachelor
    01:35:16 - Two Lalas
    01:37:52 - RHONJ
    01:51:00 - The Franchise
    01:52:32 - Perfect Match
    02:05:06 - Ending Interview
    02:11:38 - More Perfect Match
    02:13:39 - Outro

    The Viall Files
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    E766 Ask Nick - He’s Choosing His Family

    E766 Ask Nick - He’s Choosing His Family

    Welcome back to another episode of The Viall Files: Ask Nick Edition! We start off the episode by responding to our previous Ask Nick’s comments. Then we get to our callers… 

    Our first caller is wondering if she should tell a coworker about his girlfriend’s affair. Our second caller feels like her boyfriend goes mute around her family. And, our third caller wants to move, but her boyfriend wants to stay close to his family. 

    “You’re literally talking to a version of your boyfriend right now”

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    Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to asknick@theviallfiles.com to be a part of our Monday episodes. 

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    The Viall Files
    enJune 24, 2024

    E765 RR - Perfect Match w/ Stevan, Brian Baumgartner, Love Island, Gypsy Rose, & Justin Timberlake Arrest

    E765 RR - Perfect Match w/ Stevan, Brian Baumgartner, Love Island, Gypsy Rose, & Justin Timberlake Arrest

    Welcome back to The Viall Files: Reality Recap.

    This is a fun episode! Brian Baugartner, from the Office, joins us to talk all things barbecue and build his perfect reality tv cast. Meanwhile, Stevan Ditter from Perfect Match zooms in to talk all things drama in the villa… How was his experience? How is he with Alara? What is he doing now? 

    “We have to ask you, did he kiss Melinda?” 

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    Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to asknick@theviallfiles.com to be a part of our Monday episodes. 

    Listen To Disrespectfully now!

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    To Order Nick’s Book Go To: http://www.viallfiles.com 

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    Timestamps:
    00:00 - Intro
    02:59 - Household Headlines
    07:40 - Rihanna
    09:46 - Stay At Home GF
    13:33 - Icks
    17:46 - Filming
    18:37 - Proposals
    24:13 - 90 Day Fiance
    27:19 - Gypsy Rose
    29:19 - Clayton
    32:33 - Love Island
    42:02 - Welcome Brian
    01:03:26 - Getting Grilled
    01:11:40 - TikTok
    01:13:33 - Build Your Burger
    01:24:40 - Reality TV
    01:28:45 - Book Promo
    01:33:03 - The Office
    01:35:29 - Perfect Match
    01:36:50 - Stevan
    01:56:51 - Perfect Match Final Thoughts
    02:03:09 - Outro

     

    The Viall Files
    enJune 20, 2024

    E764 RR - Summer House, Perfect Match w/ Elys, Bach Bios, Kenya Moore Suspended, and RHONJ

    E764 RR - Summer House, Perfect Match w/ Elys, Bach Bios, Kenya Moore Suspended, and RHONJ

    Welcome back to reality recap. Today we start off with Nick’s first Father’s Day. Then we get to our drama: Kenya Moore being indefinitely suspended from the current season of RHOA, Football Player, Isaiah Bugs being arrested AGAIN, and Lindsay Hubbard being grilled at the Summer House Reunion Part 2. Meanwhile, Elys Hutchinson from Perfect Match joins us to talk about her experience on the show!

    “you know what? I was wrong.”

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    Timestamps:
    00:00 - Intro
    02:55 - Father’s Day
    08:11 - Housekeeping
    11:40 - RHOA
    19:38 - Football
    22:03 - Bachelor Credit
    23:04 - Red Lobster
    30:33 - The Apprentice
    43:28 - Jenn’s Men
    01:08:55 - Picking Noses
    01:14:59 - Summerhouse
    01:33:39 - Perfect Match
    01:40:19 - Elys Joins
    02:02:19 - More Perfect Match
    02:06:20 - RHONJ
    02:11:46 - Outro

    The Viall Files
    enJune 18, 2024

    E763 Ask Nick - Flirting With an NHL Player

    E763 Ask Nick - Flirting With an NHL Player

    Welcome back to another episode of The Viall Files: Ask Nick Edition! We start off the episode by addressing your gentle parenting responses and diving into the ideal dating expectations of men. Then we get to our callers… 

    Our first caller wants to shoot her shot with a professional athlete. Our second caller is back with her ex, and is afraid to tell her parents. Finally, our third caller is thriving in her occupational industry but is afraid it turns off the men she’s dating.

    “As a woman who’s very successful and passionate about her career, that should never feel like a negative for you”

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    Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to asknick@theviallfiles.com to be a part of our Monday episodes. 

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    The Viall Files
    enJune 17, 2024

    E762 GD w/ West Wilson - Summer House, Girlcode, Sleep Training, and Perfect Match with Tolú

    E762 GD w/ West Wilson - Summer House, Girlcode, Sleep Training, and Perfect Match with Tolú

    Welcome back to The Viall Files: Going Deeper, with Summer House’ West Wilson. 

    To start things out, we invite Tolú Ekundare from Netflix’s Perfect Match… She shares her experience matching with Izzy Zapata, Dom Gabriel, and Chris Hahn. Then we get to our interview with West. How was his first season? Who does he still talk to? Does he regret his relationship with Ciara?

    “When someone shows you who they are, believe it.” 

     Start your 7 Day Free Trial of Viall Files + here: https://viallfiles.supportingcast.fm/ 

     Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to asknick@theviallfiles.com to be a part of our Monday episodes.

    Listen To Disrespectfully now!

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    Timestamps:
    00:00 - Intro
    05:48 - Household Headlines
    12:23 - Love Island
    17:57 - Summerhouse Drama
    21:05 - Captain Lee
    25:39 - Sleep Training
    31:08 - Age
    34:28 - Tolú Interview
    57:10 - Feedback
    01:10:22 - West Interview
    01:17:01 - New To Bravo
    01:19:55 - Saying Weird Things
    01:21:35 - Bachelor
    01:22:37 - Selfie
    01:30:54 - Your Heart
    01:43:15 - Love Languages
    01:50:26 - Dads
    01:54:12 - Team Carl
    01:59:55 - Her Take
    02:04:27 - Open
    02:14:39 - TOH
    02:30:00 - What Is Next
    02:32:52 - Ciara
    02:48:04 - Sports
    02:48:45 - Off Your Chest
    02:49:28 - Coming on ViFi
    02:53:59 - Outro

     

    The Viall Files
    enJune 13, 2024

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