I have heard many good Christian people state throughout my years in ministry that some of their good friends are those who are non-believers. I've even had believers in Jesus Christ tell me that they are good friends with people from other religious beliefs. This has always troubled me because scripture is clear about our associations and the type of company we keep.Â
I want everyone to know up front that I am not saying that we should avoid all people who do not believe as we do. The point of this episode is to point us in the right direction about our relationships while keeping true to the word of God. It is absolutely true that Jesus Christ associated, sat, talked, and even ate meals together with sinners. In fact, scripture tells us inÂ
Matthew 9: 10 Then it happened that as [e]Jesus was reclining at the table in the house, behold, many tax collectors and [f]sinners came and were dining with Jesus and His disciples. 11 When the Pharisees saw this, they said to His disciples, âWhy is your Teacher eating with the tax collectors and sinners?â 12 But when Jesus heard this, He said, âIt is not those who are healthy who need a physician, but those who are sick. 13 But go and learn [g]what this means: âI desire [h]compassion, [i]and not sacrifice,â for I did not come to call the righteous, but sinners.â
Jesus associated with sinners and the dregs of society in order to give them the gospel and win them to Himself. It was never with the intention of having a lifelong friendship with them. Some of the encounters Jesus had with sinners were a one-time occurrence. He might sit with them, eat, and leave and never see them again. But He always left them with spiritual food and a calling to repent and turn from their sins.
When I was attending NOBTS in the early 2000s, we had an assignment to memorize Psalm 1 and be able to recite it to the class. It was actually something that I remember to this day. This passage presents to us a choice we must make in this life...a fork in the road so to speak....one way is the way of the righteous that leads to eternal life and the other is in the path of sinners that leads to destruction.Â
1 How blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked,
Nor stand in the ]path of sinners,
Nor sit in the seat of scoffers!
2 But his delight is in the law of the Lord,
And in His law he meditates day and night.
3 He will be like a tree firmly planted by [b]streams of water,
Which yields its fruit in its season
And its [c]leaf does not wither;
And [d]in whatever he does, he prospers.
4 The wicked are not so,
But they are like chaff which the wind drives away.
5 Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment,
Nor sinners in the assembly of the righteous.
6 For the Lord [e]knows the way of the righteous,
But the way of the wicked will perish.
Notice that the blessed man/woman does not walk with wicked people. They do not stand in the path with sinners. They do not sit with those who are scoffers/unbelievers. All of these people are characterized by wickedness and ungodliness. To walk not in the counsel of the ungodly means to reject any advice from the wicked. It includes avoiding any guiding influence that might shape or direct your way of life toward godlessness. Walking involves progress; thus, the verse instructs, âDonât walk in the counsel, donât stand in the path, donât sit in the seatâ of the ungodly. The apparent progression presents a picture of someone walking next to sin, then stopping to stand and take it all in, and then finally sitting right down in sinâs seat âto enjoy it.Â
Not walking, standing, or sitting with the ungodly implies steering clear of sin by avoiding participation in every aspect of the sinnerâs way of life. The apostle Paul warned, âDo not be misled: âBad company corrupts good characterââ (1 Corinthians 15:33).Â
Proverbs 22: 24 Do not associate with a man given to anger;
Or go with a hot-tempered man,
25 Or you will learn his ways
And find a snare for yourself.
How can a Christian expect to to keep progressing forward in their relationship with Christ and be formed more into His image when they associate with sinners and unbelievers? 2 Cor. 6:14 says not to be yolked together or bound together with unbelievers. Why? Because light cannot fellowship with darkness. They have nothing in common, at least not eternal things. That scripture goes on to say, come out from among them and be separate. That is not elevating yourself to a position of being better than, it is separating yourself from evil influences.Â
My grandmother has said it best my whole life, "If you lay down with dogs, you'll get fleas. If you hang around trash long enough, you'll start to stink."
Simply put, it is much easier for you to be brought down and participate in evil activities than it is for you to bring them up. This doesn't mean we never talk to, nor associate with people who are non-believers or practice other religions. It doesn't mean we are mean-spirited or think we are better than them. It means we do not have eternal things in common.Â
A believer who âwalks not in the counsel of the ungodlyâ will apply biblical truth to his daily life, letting Godâs Word be a lamp to guide his feet and a light for his path (Psalm 119:105). His âdelight is in the law of the Lord,â and he âmeditates on his law day and night,â says Psalm 1:2. This person will grow in faith and spiritual maturity.
Loving God and obeying His Word will result in abundant blessings (Joshua 1:8; Luke 11:28; John 14:21). As we read the Scriptures daily, study them, memorize them, and meditate on them night and day, our thinking changes. We no longer love the world or the things in it (1 John 2:15â17). We no longer walk in the counsel of the ungodly. We âdonât copy the behavior and customs of this worldâ; instead, God transforms us by changing how we think. Then we can experience Godâs good, pleasing, and perfect will (Romans 12:2, NLT).
People who walk in the counsel of the ungodly listen to worldly advice, make plans with the wicked, and willfully participate in the sinnerâs way of life. Romans 8:5â7 describes these people as those âwho live according to the fleshâ and âhave their minds set on what the flesh desires.â By contrast, âthose who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. The mind governed by the flesh is hostile to God; it does not submit to Godâs law, nor can it do so.â
What about associating with people of other religions? This one is really simple. 2 John 1 is very clear. Listen to what it says.
9 Anyone who goes too far and does not abide in the teaching of Christ, does not have God; the one who abides in the teaching, he has both the Father and the Son. 10 If anyone comes to you and does not bring this teaching, do not receive him into your house, and do not give him a greeting; 11 for the one who gives him a greeting participates in his evil deeds.
Did you get that? It says don't even greet them. The KJV version of scripture says do not wish them godspeed. Do not with them a good day. Do not associate with those who preach anything other than Jesus Christ is the only way to eternal life. Why? Because if you give them your approval, you are participating in their evil deeds. That is heavy friends.Â
We are to be people of the kingdom of light, not darkness. That is why I do not associate and have close friends who are non-believers. I do not hang around with people from other religious beliefs. Amos 3:3 asks us a question, How can two walk together unless they be in agreement? The answer to that question is....you can't. You cannot walk with those who do not think like you, walk like you, act like you, believe like you....well, you may be able to, but I can't. I want to associate myself with those who have the same mindset and worldview that I have and that is a mind and belief system that is based on the absolute authoritative word of God and belief in His one and only begotten Son, Jesus Christ. We are to be separate.Â
What are our relationships with non-christian people supposed to look like? We are to share the gospel of Jesus Christ with them until they are converted. Here is what I promise you, if you begin to share the gospel with all of your non-believing friends, or those who do not believe as you do according to the word of God, the separation will happen automatically! Start telling them about the Jesus of the Bible and associating yourself with people who know Jesus Christ.
