divorce and happiness

Communication is much more than just talking and listening; it requires a set of skills beyond these simple actions. Still, it is possible to acquire these skills with the right guidance. When we are dealing with divorce, having Ninja Communication Skills will put you closer to a positive outcome, closer to a successful separation. 

Let's get into it

Timestamps

We are pretty bad at communicating [00:01:30]

Why we get triggered? [00:03:00]

The six other possible scenarios rule [00:06:00]

This is what I hear, is this what you are saying? [00:07:30]

My evolution at communicating [00:09:30]

Body language [00:12:00]

Mirroring your interlocutor [00:14:00]

Communicating with yourself [00:18:00]

Links

How To Tell Your Partner, You No Longer Want To Be Married.

https://divorceangel.vipmembervault.com/products/courses/view/1022671

My book: The Jelly Bean Jar - Empowering Independence through Divorce

https://tanyasomerton.com/shop/the-jelly-bean-jar/

Join my Free Facebook Group here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceangel/

Divorce Roadmap Session:

https://tanyasomerton.com/divorce-roadmap/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Getting a divorce is a little bit more complicated than just going to a lawyer. We will need emotional support, legal support, financial support and of course, life support. A tough journey lays in front of us, and it is our choice to get to the other side either severely wounded or stronger and wiser. Listen to my latest podcast episode and discover why leaving a marriage is never easy. 

Let's get into it

Timestamps

Divorce doesn't need to be as complicated as we make it [00:02:10]

The moment you feel its time to move on [00:04:00]

How we hear advice / How we should hear it [00:05:00] 

The relevance of pre-work [00:07:00]

Do we communicate properly? [00:09:00]

What is it that we want out of our life? [00:11:30]

Like peeling an onion [00:13:30]

Links

5 Steps To A Seamless Divorce

https://divorceangel.vipmembervault.com/products/courses/view/1008392

My book: The Jelly Bean Jar - Empowering Independence through Divorce

https://tanyasomerton.com/shop/the-jelly-bean-jar/

Join my Free Facebook Group here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceangel/

Divorce Roadmap Session:

https://tanyasomerton.com/divorce-roadmap/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week I would like to share with you the story of a couple that made a tough decision during these rough times. The announcement of the pandemic hit in the middle of their divorce process, forcing them to figure out a different way to face the lockdown. Having their 7-year-old son in mind, they looked at the bigger picture before deciding how to deal with their divorce. Join me in today's episode and listen to this inspiring story of different thinking during the lockdown.  

Let's get into it

The story of "Jill" and "Robert" [00:01:30]

The procedure during lockdown that decided they fate [00:02:40]

A previous arrangement that helped in their decision [00:03:40] 

How are they dealing with the new scenario? [00:04:49]

Looking at the bigger picture [00:06:00]

Links

My book: The Jelly Bean Jar - Empowering Independence through Divorce

https://tanyasomerton.com/shop/the-jelly-bean-jar/

Join my Free Facebook Group here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceangel/

Divorce Roadmap Session:

https://tanyasomerton.com/divorce-roadmap/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Dealing with divorce might pull the darkest thoughts out of our minds. The result of being under so much pressure and stress could lead us to flirt with extreme ideas. Bad decisions, lousy counselling or even an honest mistake of a lawyer could make us feel that divorce has broken our spirit.

In this episode of the Divorce Angel Podcast, I share with you my best tips to avoid falling into this place. 

Let's get into it

Timestamps

We are dealing with a broken system [00:02:00]

How men and women detect red flags [00:04:00]

Why divorce take some men by surprise [00:06:00]

A goldmine for lawyers [00:08:00] 

Divorce Angel and the 80-20 rule [00:09:30]

How divorce can break someone's spirit [00:10:30]

Links:

My book: The Jelly Bean Jar - Empowering Independence through Divorce

https://tanyasomerton.com/shop/the-jelly-bean-jar/

Join my Free Facebook Group here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceangel/

Divorce Roadmap Session:

https://tanyasomerton.com/divorce-roadmap/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

To be balanced, the universe needs to give back the energy it receives. It sends back what we send to it. What we do to other people, what we say to other people, every action we take creates an energy that will sooner or later, return to us like a boomerang. This is why we should be careful about what we send out. 

In this episode of the Divorce Angel podcast, I share with you the tips I followed to reach inner peace and well-being.

Let's get into it:

Timestamps

What's happening to you is producing a vibration through your life. [00:01:20]

I used to retaliate. I used to be triggered. [00:02:30]

I don't do it anymore. I'm not doing it again. [00:04:00]

Don't let anyone take your inner peace. [00:05:30]

Sometimes you need to move on. [00:07:00]

The importance of taking care of our well-being. [00:09:00]

One of the tools I used to reach inner peace. [00:10:20]

You already have what you need. [00:12:00]

Links:

My book: The Jelly Bean Jar - Empowering Independence through Divorce

https://tanyasomerton.com/shop/the-jelly-bean-jar/

Join my Free Facebook Group here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceangel/

Divorce Roadmap Session:

https://tanyasomerton.com/divorce-roadmap/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Being scared of the unknown is considered by science the fundamental fear. What triggers this fear, is the absence of information. For instance, the outcome of a decision we might make. This fear will keep us trapped in either an uncomfortable or unhealthy relationship. 

In this episode of the Divorce Angel Podcast, we talk about how dangerous it is to be a hostage of the "FEAR of the unknown", and how important it is to conquer it. 

Let's get into it:

Timestamps

The importance of putting a structure together. [00:01:00] 

What makes our minds decide to stay. [00:02:41] 

Do not live in unhappiness because those are the cards you have. [00:03:30] 

What you have will not define your happiness. [00:06:00]

There is a lot of life-changing knowledge we are not aware of their existence. [00:08:00]

Secret or hidden should not be scary but exciting. [00:10:00]

Do not be scared of losing everything. You can always start again. [00:12:00]

The unknown can be fulfilling. [00:13:00]

Links:

My book: The Jelly Bean Jar - Empowering Independence through Divorce

https://tanyasomerton.com/shop/the-jelly-bean-jar/

Join my Free Facebook Group here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceangel/

Divorce Roadmap Session:

https://tanyasomerton.com/divorce-roadmap/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Marriage may be affected by things that mostly we can't control. They will appear, and we will have to learn how to deal with them. What we can manage, however, is our reaction to these unexpected events. 

We are the reflection of how we deal with the issues surrounding our marriage. Even during divorce, if we handle it with love and kindness, that is what we will get back. We are a reflection of our relationships. To see how we show up in life, we need to look at how we show up in our relationships. In this episode, we talk about the details we should observe to improve the way we show up in life. 

Let’s get into it:

Timestamps:

How did I used to show up in life [00:02:45]

Are you lying to yourself? [00:04:30]

My clients' light bulb momment[00:06:30]

If you don't trust your partner, do you trust yourself? [00:07:10]

Always give a 100% [00:10:00] 

The BE-DO-HAVE model [00:12:00]

Showing love and kindness during divorce [00:13:20]

The nuts and bolts case [00:15:45]

My mission on this job. [00:16:30]

Links:

My book: The Jelly Bean Jar - Empowering Independence through Divorce

https://tanyasomerton.com/shop/the-jelly-bean-jar/

Join my Free Facebook Group here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceangel/

Divorce Roadmap Session:

https://tanyasomerton.com/divorce-roadmap/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

To our kids, divorce is a life long process. During this process, the ability to do a great job at parenting is even more relevant. We need to be very careful with what we say and do in front of our children because we are their source on how to behave and react in life.

Everything we say about our ex-spouse will affect our kids, either positively or negatively. Negative remarks we make about our ex-spouse will leave a scar in our kids, and that is why we need to be mindful of what we choose to say and do. 

Co-parenting can truly be a success if you chose to do it in a child centered approach. In this episode, we talk about strategies to avoid making mistakes as divorced parents and how you can handle your emotions better around your kids.  We just need to have a well thought through approach to anything in life to make it work.  After all parenting is tough and co-parenting has its own set of challenges. By the end of this podcast you will know its not rocket science. All we need is a mindful approach to make co-parenting a success.

Timestamps:

Why we choose that person in the first place?[00:01:00]

What our kids struggle the most during a divorce? [00:03:00]

Our kids learn from us.[00:05:00]

How to explain to our kids what is happening and why?[00:07:00]

The importance of being present. [00:09:00]

Quality time or quantity of time, what our kids need? [00:11:00]

What do our kids need in a moment like this? [00:13:00]

The risks of involving our kids. [00:15:00]

The benefits of avoiding overthinking. [00:17:00]

Links:

My book: The Jelly Bean Jar - Empowering Independence through Divorce

https://tanyasomerton.com/shop/the-jelly-bean-jar/

Join my Free Facebook Group here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceangel/

Divorce Roadmap Session:

https://tanyasomerton.com/divorce-roadmap/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Today's episode is about the decisions we make that have financial implications when going through a divorce. When we are experiencing extreme situations, the urgent does not allow time for the important. We may end up making decisions that seem the right thing to do, but if we look at the outcome of that decision in the long term it does not seem so right.  For example, it could be thinking of keeping an asset or a property which is probably the easiest thing to do, but not necessarily the best choice. What should we consider when deciding this?

If we think about divorce as a chance to press a restart button, maybe this new perspective would let us see new opportunities.

In this episode, we will have a closer look at the decisions we make and the financial outcomes of each one of them. 

So let’s get into it:

Timestamps:

My struggles when I was facing my divorce. [00:01:00]

It is about money-in or money-out? [00:02:00]

The story about the two ladies.[00:04:00]

"Everything will always be okay".[00:09:00]

Divorce to a lawyer vs Divorce to us. [00:11:00]

The easy thing to do might not be the right thing right now. [00:13:00] 

Think of the longterm benefit of the decisions that you make today. [00:15:00]

Links:

My book: The Jelly Bean Jar - Empowering Independence through Divorce

https://tanyasomerton.com/shop/the-jelly-bean-jar/

Join my Free Facebook Group here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceangel/

Divorce Roadmap Session:

https://tanyasomerton.com/divorce-roadmap/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.