millcreek

Spring bringing a sense or renewal parallels my experience in OA

Prior to OA I was a Seed, full of potential but eating and nothings happens, In OA I germinated and began to grow - spiritually. But not right away.

My highest was at least 562. so far over 300 lbs

Walking upstairs is a miracle given to me by my participation in OA.

There are "God shots" which give me appropriate times to share about program.

Things tend to work out better when I am present and that only happens when I am NOT in the food.

The problem is rarely what I think it is, It is more likely how  I think about it.

I came into OA wondering why everyone was cheerful.

My eating habits were reflected in the birth weight of my children.

I picked a sponsor for their energy and joy, not the weight loss. 

I don't know what ' A little bit' means. I am better off when have a solid food plan and don't have to think about it or make decisions.

I survived my son's wedding. 

I work to avoid complacency.

I am maxed out with 2 sponsees, school and a family. It all brings me joy as long as I work my program.

I am look forward to  what God has in store for me tomorrow.

Normal weight up till 11 when my Dad died.

In HS I was 4'9" and 250.

My mom put me on every diet available and none worked.

1st time in OA I  lost over 100 Lbs but it brought up issues I was unwilling to deal with.  OA works if you work it. I didn't.

Came back with a clearer understanding my step one.

I lived with the paradox of the my weight saying 'Notice me' and also wanting to be invisible.

My 2nd time in ended with one bite of See's candy.

I came back a 3rd time with a commitment not to leave, no matter what.

Today I am comfortable in my body, I am healthy and happy. 

I know OA saved my life, gave me self-esteem. I exercise regularly, talk with my sponsor and more. 

My food plan varies based on an honest evaluation of my relationship with particular foods at particular times.

Never a time when food wasn't the most important thing to me.

First OA Meeting when I was 12.

At 23 I was my top weight 423 but because I was young the physical damage was not that bad yet.

I broke toilets, lived through surgical complications and more all because of my weight without any change.

My body was killing me and I couldn't do anything. It was the only body I knew

When I fanallly return to OA that meeting was about death and I felt at home.

For the first year I  sponsored myself rigorously and had some results until I hit my own plateau several times.

Regardless of where I was food wise I never left the program.

I am two different people. My life in the food and my life in recovery.

Today I have a life where I am trusted, I experience love in both directions and I have self esteem.

100 Pounder multiple times.

I lost the weight but i was still me and my best friend was food.

I am a survivor of abuse as a child. As an adult I addressed my part and moving from victim to survivor.

I was always my own worst critic and I was brutal.

When I found my first OA Meeting I was broken and hopeless. They welcomed me. 

Current weight loss is about 155 lbs.

Service has saved my life. I recommend it.

I continue to connect the dots from my past to adjust my future.

My disease wants me dead. Today I want to live.

Top weight over 500 lbs in high school. Now around 195. 

I flucuated between 350 and 500 many times.

Coming into OA I had a food plan AND I restricted. I started lying, the food and weight was coming back and I acknowledged I was in relapse.

I eventually ended up praying, had a spiritual experience and the journey to recovery started for real.

Rigorous honesty became a way of life as I made my amends.

I still want more - That is my disease.  But I don't act on it - That is my recovery.

Cannot remember a time when I was not obsessed with food.

Major disappointment when I realized my size was related to my food and thought it was my fault.

Going away to college opened up all the doors.

Top recorded weight was 236. now about 135.

On my own I lost weight but was super unhealthy and the stress was still terrible. Why can't I control this?

Came into OA realizing I was an alcoholic with food. Crazy for the first few moths, Then settled down as I did the steps.

Some of the tools every day.

No matter how long I have been in the program I need to be accountable for my food.

I gained 110 Lbs in my last relapse which brought on a host of physical problems

When I took my 1st compulsive bite 4 years ago it did not occur to me downhill path I would go down.

I never stopped going to meetings or the OA birthday event.

In a moment without my intention I jumped back in. got a sponsor and took direction against my will.

Day by day I developed and improved a relationship with a higher power. . for REAL.

Now I have 2 years.

A ropes course became the metaphor for my not having and then reconnecting with my higher power.

Joined OA In San Fernando Valley for a year.

The premise ' I can do it in my own' did not work. My intellectual armor was the wall I kept banging into.

Coming back to OA it was a spiritual focus on the steps and tools which  relieved me of the bondage of self and made the difference for the long term.

Our food plan is personal based on our PARTICULAR way of eating compulsively.

When I ate I got things done.

I was choosing food over shelter.

A 300 lbs I felt small.

I went to OA, got embraced, hooked and started my recovery. I get an apartment and a job the first week.

The foundation of my recovery is honesty. That creates the space for God to come in.

My recovery is not a return but a discovery and becoming who I am.

I am in multiple 12 steps programs and I need to be. but OA is my home base.

I have been through a lot of emotional events and stayed abstinent.

Question begin @ 26 minutes.

Thin to normal until late teens.

by 24 years old I added 3 kids and 125 pounds.

Tried to manage my weight myself with little results

Came to OA 2 years ago, Had 1 short slip after 6 months and now a back on track.

I have medical issue and medicine that affects my weight.

At one point I would try to make my husband responsible for what I ate.

As a child my constant discontent was only salved with food.

Joining the service kept in under control . . for a while.

When everything failed even in the program I finally surrendered and got a sponsor and followed direction. and i worked.   Who knew?

I am not an occasional or moderate over eater. I am addict as outlined in the Big Book

My relationship with my higher power mirrors my recovery.

My recovery jumped into high gear when I started working the program as outlined in the Big Book.

We are united by a very personal and individual disease.

well over 300 LBS a number of times was one way my disease manifested in my life.

Rapid weight gain and rapid weight loss was a recurring pattern.

My therapist 'suggested' OA.

I became abstinent immediately. It was a shock. I found I was able to out foods down for one day . . repeatedly.

The Doctor's Opinion in the Big Book meant a lot to me.

I Liked the effect of my reaction to my addictive behavior. As a result of this program I HAVE experienced the psychic change.

I had my stomach pumped at age 5.

I ate over every single feeling. My family tried everything, doctors, bribes etc, some worked . for a second.

Food was my second addiction, Poor me. Joined a very strict  program, Felt great for two years, then back out and plus 100.

Important to trick the fast food clerk that it wasn't all for me.

Found OA in order to work the steps on food through the Big Book.

Honesty was a real problem for me. Or rather lack of honesty.

First miracle was starting on a Thursday. This time through the steps was an eye opener (understatement). Doing what was asked yielded real results.

Zoom is gift of Covid allowing me to sneak back into the rooms before I was perfect.

Today I do morning prayers, text my sponsor, read from the Big Book. commit my recovery to my higher power.

Still working on my honesty.

I had a good childhood. No major drama, church etc.  However Love = Food and I wanted love.

with weight - Loosing =Good, Gaining = Bad.

Only in hindsight do I realize food was my drug even as a child.

I was active which helped keep my weight down but I still used pills.

Left on my own in college - Game on! 

Through marriage, kids the YoYo got bigger, more expensive, and more devastating.

I knew there was a spiritual problem but knowing it didn't work.

I ended up in OA,, surrendered to God, have given up 197 Lbs, and maintain it.

Stats - came in 2011 at 35 years old and 320 Lbs. Now maintaining a 150 lb loss for the last 4 years.

Only one of 5 kids who was overweight.. I was a participant in my life. My weight did not define me but it was always with me.

Lost 90 lbs before getting pregnant, Put on 100 during and after.

I had heard about OA from my mom forever so I knew where to go when I was ready.

3.5 years for physical recovery. Finally hooked up with a sponsor and worked the steps from a phone meeting way before Covid forced it upon us.

Going through the steps and the Big Book transformed my recovery, my relationship with a Higher Power and I achieved food neutrality.

I ended up overeating with fruit which was triggered by dextrose in salt pack at work AND because I did not tell the truth to my sponsor.

Today I maintain my weight and my clothes always fit.

I can be with my family without enjoy them enjoying thier food.

I work the steps every day as need without shame. and wrap my day up with a review of my successes and a ask God to help me get better in other areas.

I put on 250 lbs in high school.

I had success with a soup, Valium and scotch diet, for a minute.

I thought drugs would be my solution. I had highly negative side effects.

I ended up in OA with 3 three meals nothing in between one day at a time and today I have a level of serenity and acceptance beyond anything I could have imagined.

My goal weight is what I weigh today and adjust my food plan  accordingly when it drifts.

I can find an abstinent meal in any restaurant in the world.

My never ending journey through the steps has ups and downs with continuous improvements in my behavior.

My dreams are coming true because of OA.

Young trauma, Covered it up with food. There was a moment when I really did eat a full dinner for 5 by myself.

I used my size and was successful in football and still wanted to avoid the spotlight.

My binge was a cycle. dramatically dropping weight for specific events.

I struggled with letting people in. Good at work but no social skills.

A woman, God and church came into my life and chased the binges away - for a while.

I was sure if anyone knew how I ate they would reject me - horribly.

I had a medical emergency which turned into a miracle. Then  ate up to 670 Lbs

Treatment ended up in white knuckle recovery. worked for a year. Back up and back to treatment where the OA seed was planted.

Miracle after miracle led be into my current successful recovery and a quality life.

I come from an obese family so we were all big boned.

I was able to be a large drug addict.

My 20's and 30's was a series of Pay and Weighs.

I started out as an OA Rockstar led to 'I got this'.  Back up to 300.

I came back and have been weighing and measuring for over 5 years. It works for me.

It took me while to find my spiritual groove for my life and my food. Everyone is different.

I have been in the same weight zone and have been the same size for years. I no longer weigh myself so I am not affected by the number.

I wish I could include my family on me recovery journey but that it is their choice.

I am no longer envious of 'normal' eaters.