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    124 - HEARTBREAK - Is self-hypnosis the ultimate 'healing from heartbreak' hack we’ve all been missing? Ft. Dr David Spiegel

    en-usOctober 30, 2023

    Podcast Summary

    • Bumble enhances online dating with new features and Kroger offers affordable food optionsWhile therapy addresses psychological healing, the biological experience of heartbreak and rejection may require additional focus for complete recovery

      Bumble is introducing new features to make online dating easier, more compatible, and safer for users. Meanwhile, Kroger offers a wide range of affordable and inspiring food options, saving consumers both time and money. In a more personal note, Louise Rumble shared her experiences with heartbreak and grief, emphasizing that deep pain and rejection trigger both psychological and biological reactions. While therapy can help with the psychological aspect, the biological experience often requires more attention. The key takeaway is that closure is not necessary to move forward, and focusing solely on psychological healing may not address the entirety of the experience.

    • Healing heartbreak through self-hypnosisSelf-hypnosis can help build new neural pathways, improve sleep, breathing, and even quit habits, providing a powerful tool for healing and personal growth. Accessible through apps like Reverie, it offers a free 2-week trial for Open House listeners.

      Self-hypnosis can be a powerful tool for healing heartbreak and promoting personal growth. The speaker shares her personal experience of being desperate for closure and emotional connection after a breakup, but ultimately finding that the ability to look at the situation from a new perspective was key to moving forward. Self-hypnosis can help us build new neural pathways, improve sleep and breathing, and even quit habits. It goes to the root of our biology, influencing our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors in a more profound way than other methods. With the help of self-hypnosis apps like Reverie, anyone can access this powerful tool and start to rewire their brain, even when professional therapy is not an option. The speaker strongly believes that everyone deserves access to effective tools for healing and growth, especially during difficult times. Reverie is offering a free 2-week trial to Open House podcast listeners, so they can experience the benefits for themselves.

    • Use self-hypnosis to manage heartbreak and focus on positive thoughtsSelf-hypnosis helps manage heartbreak by focusing on positive thoughts, minimizing distractions, and promoting inner peace

      Self-hypnosis is a powerful tool for focusing the mind and redirecting attention, making it an effective method for managing heartbreak and overcoming the pain of past relationships. Self-hypnosis is a natural state of highly focused attention, where outside distractions are minimized, allowing individuals to have more control over their thoughts and emotions. By intently focusing on positive thoughts and images, individuals can effectively push unwanted thoughts and memories out of their consciousness, providing relief and facilitating the healing process. This technique can help individuals move past the pain of heartbreak and focus on the future, ultimately leading to a greater sense of peace and happiness. Self-hypnosis is a simple yet effective way to regain control and find inner peace during difficult emotional times.

    • The grieving process of heartbreak reshapes our brain's pathwaysUnderstanding the grieving process and recognizing the good and bad aspects of past relationships can help create new neurons and open us up to new connections

      When we experience heartbreak, our brains go through a grieving process that involves reshaping the pathways used to contemplate past and future relationships. This process can make us focus on the loss rather than potential new connections. Neurons that fire together wire together, and as we build strong connections to a particular person, we're precluding the development of other connections. To move on, it's essential to recognize the good things we got from the relationship but also consider the potential drawbacks. This cognitive flexibility allows us to see the advantages and disadvantages of different situations and consider the possibility of new connections. Self-hypnosis can help us go deep and create new neurons, enabling us to form new stories and beliefs. By focusing on the positive aspects of past relationships and maintaining an open mind, we increase our chances of finding fulfilling new connections.

    • Use self-hypnosis for perspective during relationshipsSelf-hypnosis can help individuals evaluate their feelings, consider situations from different angles, build confidence, and make healthier relationship choices.

      Self-hypnosis can help provide perspective and objectivity during challenging relationships, particularly in the context of heartbreak. The discussion highlighted how we can sometimes overlook red flags and make excuses for unacceptable behavior due to our own insecurities and the allure of the good aspects of a relationship. Self-hypnosis can serve as a tool for introspection and self-reflection, allowing individuals to evaluate their feelings and consider the situation from different angles. It can also help build confidence and alleviate personal deficiencies, empowering individuals to make healthier relationship choices. The default mode network in the brain, which is involved in self-reflection, can be harnessed through self-hypnosis to better understand one's emotions and reactions, ultimately leading to improved decision-making and personal growth.

    • Quieting the mind during self-hypnosisDuring self-hypnosis, areas like the dorsal anterior cingulate gyrus, executive control network, and posterior cingulate cortex are activated or suppressed to help us focus, control perception, and explore different aspects of ourselves.

      Self-hypnosis can provide a quiet, focused space where we can objectively assess situations and experiences without distractions or judgments. During hypnosis, certain areas of the brain are activated or suppressed to facilitate this state. The dorsal anterior cingulate gyrus, part of the salience network, is quieted, allowing us to focus on the present moment without being distracted by external stimuli or potential threats. The executive control network, located in the prefrontal cortex and insula, enables us to control our mind-body relationship and perception of pain. Additionally, the posterior part of the cingulate cortex, which is responsible for self-evaluation and self-consciousness, is turned down, allowing us to experiment with being different versions of ourselves. This ability to enter a state of focused, open-minded exploration is a natural human capacity that we evolved to help us learn and adapt, much like how children learn effortlessly through play.

    • Flexibility and Playfulness in the Face of ChangeBeing flexible during change, especially after a breakup, helps personal growth and happiness. Hypnosis can aid in seeing situations from a new perspective, recognizing self-worth, and considering others' perspectives.

      Being flexible and playful in the face of change, especially during difficult times like a breakup, is crucial for personal growth and happiness. Our brains can get stuck in negative thought patterns and hold on to past experiences, making it hard to see ourselves as someone different. During the withdrawal phase, looking at past memories, especially on social media, can contaminate our self-image and make it harder to move on. Hypnosis can help us be more flexible by allowing us to see situations from a different perspective and recognize our own value. It's natural to focus on our own shortcomings in a relationship, but it's also important to consider the other person's perspective and realize that there may be something better out there. By practicing cognitive flexibility and grieving the pain while also learning from the experience, we can continue to shape our lives and make ourselves more available to novelty and enjoyment.

    • The Power of NeuroplasticityOur brains can adapt and reshape themselves through experiences and relationships, allowing us to build new habits and focus our attention. Self-compassion and creating new habits can help rewire our brains during difficult times, while hypnosis can focus our attention on positive experiences.

      Our brains have the ability to adapt and reshape themselves based on our experiences and relationships. This process, called neuroplasticity, allows us to build new habits and patterns, and even focus our attention on certain things while neglecting others. During difficult times, such as the end of a relationship, it's important to recognize that our emotional response is not a reflection of our worth, but rather a part of the human experience. By practicing self-compassion and creating new habits, we can rewire our brains and build a stronger, more adaptive neural network. Additionally, the use of hypnosis can help us focus our attention and energy on positive experiences and reduce pain or discomfort. By understanding the power of neuroplasticity and utilizing it to our advantage, we can shape our brains to better serve us in all aspects of life.

    • Harnessing the Power of the Brain with TechnologyTechnology can help us manage distress, improve focus, and build new neural pathways through tools like hypnosis apps, grief support platforms, and stress management techniques.

      The brain, our major evolutionary advantage, can be harnessed and trained using technology to help individuals manage distress, improve focus, and even build new neural pathways. Hypnosis, which is essentially self-hypnosis, can be made accessible to anyone through apps, making it an effective tool for managing pain, grief, stress, and other challenges. The process of grieving does not mean one must endure all the pain before moving on; instead, it involves mourning the loss while also recognizing the potential for new possibilities and relationships. By focusing on respecting and protecting our bodies, and handling stress from the ground up, we can unlock the full potential of our brains and lead happier, healthier lives.

    • Exploring the Power of Focusing on the GoodOur brains can unlock new possibilities by focusing on positive experiences, using cognitive flexibility, and controlling attention through absorption and dissociation.

      Our brains have the ability to focus on the good and unlock new possibilities even in difficult situations. This concept was discussed in relation to relationships and the use of hypnosis to help balance the good and bad experiences. The idea of cognitive flexibility was emphasized, allowing individuals to interlock the present and future, and consider the potential for more pleasurable experiences. The discussion also touched upon the concept of absorption and dissociation, highlighting the brain's capacity to focus on what we want to attend to and disconnect from what we'd rather not engage with. Ultimately, the goal is to use these skills to help our brains work for us, rather than against us, and to find a way to move forward in life.

    • Friends with your brain during heartbreakThrough practices like self-hypnosis or using apps like Reverie, you can change your brain and biology during heartbreak to build a positive future.

      During times of heartbreak, it's essential to make friends with your brain rather than being condemned to a fixed mental state. This can be achieved through practices like self-hypnosis or using apps like Reverie. By focusing on desired beliefs, beliefs, and stories, you can change your brain and biology. Remember, your brain is a powerful tool that can help you build a better future instead of just dwelling on the past. David encourages everyone to take full advantage of this tool and not let heartbreak define their mental state forever. For more information on Reverie and self-hypnosis, check the show notes for links to the app and website. Overall, the key takeaway is that with the right mindset and tools, you can learn to move forward from heartbreak and create a positive future.

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    The Magic of Human Design

    The Magic of Human Design

    "To speak to that person listening where this will be that pivotal moment. I get chills thinking of that because that was mine. I was seeing cognitive behavioral therapists. I was on depression, medication, anxiety medication. I was at sleep clinics because I had severe insomnia and everything shifted. When I finally found human design, I realized everything I was beating myself self up over all these years was exactly what I was meant to be bringing forward in this world. And it was my blueprint. So when I look at human design, really what we're looking at is our energetic blueprint. It's combining astrology, Western astrology."

    In this episode of Master Your Mindset and Metabolism, I have the honor and pleasure of speaking with Human Design Expert and Business Coach, Ashley Briana Eve.

    In this episode we talk all things Human Design! The different types, the foundation of it, and how it can truly change your life!

    Some of the topics covered in the episode are:

    • What Human Design is and how it was created.
    • The different types of designs and how it relates to your past, present, and future. 
    • ...and so much cool shit you won't want to miss it!

    If you enjoyed this episode with me and Ashley, please screenshot the episode and tag both of us in your stories with your biggest takeaway - @kellyadunlap

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    Master Your Mindset & Metabolism with Kelly Dunlap

    Connect with Kelly:

    Email: kelly@kellydunlapwellness.com

    Check out my Metabolism Reboot Academy: www.kellydunlap.com/mra

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