Podcast Summary
The Importance of Rough and Tumble Play in Child Development: Rough and tumble play can regulate aggression and foster pro-social behavior in children. Pretend play develops reciprocal and social skills. Mothers overprotecting children can have negative effects on child discipline and father involvement.
In this conversation, Jordan Peterson and Rafe Kelly discuss the importance of rough and tumble play in child development. Studies show that this type of play can help regulate aggression and foster pro-social behavior in children as young as six months old. Additionally, pretend play helps develop reciprocal and social skills. Rafe shares how rough and tumble play specifically helped him regulate his emotions, and how it was a healing experience. The conversation also touches on the potential negative effects of mothers overprotecting their children and undermining fathers' involvement in child discipline and interaction.
The Importance of Rough and Tumble Play for Child Development and Empathy Building: Rough and tumble play helps children develop empathy by understanding the impact of touch and movement on others. Inhibition of play has been linked to individuals who become spree killers.
Rafe Kelley, in conversation with Jordan Peterson, shared his experience of being set up for a rough start to life. However, he found a way to resolve this crisis by accessing rough and tumble play and epic literature. When Rafe began working with children, he noticed that they all had a deep unmet need for rough and tumble play. This led to his role in facilitating rough and tumble play for younger children. Rafe also discovered that there is a connection between inhibition of play and people who become spree killers. Through research, Rafe found that rough and tumble play helps individuals develop empathy by recognizing how touch and movement affect others.
The Importance of Rough and Tumble Play in Empathy Development: Playful physical activities allow individuals to understand physical limits and mimic the feelings of others. Depriving boys of rough play can lead to aggression and hinder proper brain development. Rough play should be culturally accepted to regulate emotions and develop empathy.
Rough and tumble play is key in developing empathy because it allows individuals to use their body as a platform for running simulations of other people. Through physical play, individuals learn about their own physical limits and can map those limits onto others, which creates a deeply embodied knowledge of other's pain and feelings. When boys are deprived of this type of play, they can become hyper-aggressive, and their prefrontal cortexes may not mature properly. Medicalizing this behavior through medications such as Ritalin is not an ideal solution. Instead, we need to provide cultural spaces for roughhousing play to take place, which can help regulate emotions and develop empathy.
The Importance of Playing Physical Games for Emotional Regulation and Conflict Resolution: Playing physical games, whether with humans or animals, helps develop the ability to handle provocation, bring conflicts to an end, and control aggression, which is important for civilized interactions later in life.
Playing physical games like wrestling teaches children how to handle provocation and regulate their emotional response, which is important for civilized interactions later in life. It also helps them learn how to bring a fight to an end and encapsulate conflicts. Similarly, rough play with puppies helps them regulate their bite inhibition and develop a soft jaw, making them less dangerous as adults. Thus, playing physical games is essential for developing fine-tuned capacities to control aggression in humans and animals alike.
The Importance of Rough and Tumble Play for Child and Animal Development: Allowing children and animals to engage in healthy rough and tumble play helps them learn physical limits, regulate emotions, and distinguish between true aggression and pretend play. Lack of such play leads to confusion between healthy play and violence.
In this discussion, Jordan Peterson and Rafe Kelley highlight the importance of rough and tumble play in the development of children and dogs. The play allows them to explore physical interaction and learn their limits while regulating emotions and building trust with peers. However, the lack of such play in our culture has led to a collapse of the map of touch, where healthy play is confused with violence. To properly develop, children and animals should be allowed to engage in rough and tumble play as it sharpens their maps and helps them distinguish between true aggression and pretend aggression.
The Negative Effects of Suppressing Rough and Tumble Play in Children: Allowing children to engage in physical competition and cooperation can promote emotional regulation and social skills, while prohibiting it can hinder development and lead to difficulties in forming partnerships later in life. Conflict can teach boundaries and is not necessarily negative.
The suppression of rough and tumble play, which includes physical competition and cooperation, has negative effects on both boys and girls. It can lead to a lack of emotional regulation, awkward movement, and difficulty in forming partnerships later in life. Enforced zero conflict doesn't necessarily promote peace, as conflict can help teach boundaries and bring an end to it. Women may be more likely to accept the cultural view that rough and tumble play is unacceptable, but they can benefit greatly from it, including healing and a better understanding of men. It's also important to note that denying this type of play to rats can hinder their ability to engage in courtship and mounting behavior as adults.
The minimally linked relationship between video games and aggression: Virtual play should not replace physical play as it can lead to late manifestation of pretend play, causing identity confusion among adolescents. Making fundamental reconnections with the real world is the solution.
The link between violent video games and aggression is minimal as aggressive boys tend to like more aggressive video games, and their liking for such games does not cause aggression. The content of what is delivered on cell phones may not be the primary problem; the real issue is the substitution of the screen for direct, rough and tumble physical play or abstracted pretend play. Suppressing play can lead to late manifestation of pretend play, causing identity confusion among adolescents. This suppression of play is a problem as it outcompetes traditional nourishments, such as physical play, and can lead to delusional landscapes of entertainment that are not properly mapped onto the real world. The solution is to invite people back into their bodies and make fundamental reconnections with the world.
The Importance of Play and Fundamental Connections: Playing, especially rough and tumble play, reconnects us with the world, along with other essential connections such as our internal connection, body-environment connection, and connection to others. Playing with constraints helps initiate play and develop wisdom.
Play, particularly rough and tumble play, is one of the fundamental connections we have with the world, and it is important to renew this relationship. Other fundamental connections include our internal connections within ourselves, our body's connection to the environment, our ability to manipulate objects, and our relationship to others and something transcendent. To initiate play, it can be helpful to use constraints, such as a game that doesn't require specific skills yet. Developing embodied practices through play can help cultivate wisdom and counteract the hyperstimulation of modern products designed to grab onto reward centers in the brain.
The Benefits of Off-Balancing Games for Wrestling Beginners: Off-balancing games are a low-risk and accessible way to introduce wrestling, allowing individuals of all ages to participate and have fun while establishing a deeper level of understanding and connection through play.
The introduction of off-balancing games, where people pull each other off balance, is a low-risk and easy way to introduce wrestling to inexperienced individuals. These games have clear victory conditions and do not require aggression, making them accessible to people of all ages, including children. Despite initial apprehension from some individuals, almost all participants find the game fun and enjoyable, which is reflected in the uncontrollable laughter that accompanies the gameplay. This laughter is a physiological reflection of the safety and attunement that is established during play, indicating a deeper level of learning and understanding between two individuals.
The Benefits of Physical Play and Engagement: Engaging in physical play can build skills and provide a sense of safety and joy, helping individuals develop the ability to tackle challenges, including the struggle with spirituality.
The idea of play and physical engagement can be deeply mutually affording of development. It is important to learn the basic rules of physical engagement and build up the necessary skills to progress towards highly competitive and highly attuned acrobatic games like mixed martial arts and dance. Engaging in physical play can help build skills and develop the ability to wrestle with difficult challenges, including the idea of struggling with God. Physical play can provide a sense of safety and joy, indicating that it is valuable and worth repeating.
The Role of Physical Play in Building Relationships and Empathy: Physical play, such as dance and combat, can help humans understand social hierarchies and build empathy by developing social competence and theory of mind. Animals across the kingdom also engage in non-lethal combat to minimize harm.
Rafe Kelley discusses how play, specifically physical play in the form of dance and combat, can contribute to our understanding of relationships, social hierarchy, and empathy. He notes that animals across the kingdom engage in forms of non-lethal combat in order to determine dominance and minimize harm to themselves and others. Humans have also evolved to engage in forms of play that build social competence and theory of mind, allowing us to understand the perspectives and needs of others. In this way, physical play can contribute to building empathy and strengthening relationships, while also helping us understand and navigate social hierarchies.
The Importance of Well-Matched Partners and Micro-Victories in Optimal Competition: In competition, it's important to have a partner who matches your skill level and to strive for small victories to avoid demoralization. Creating a fair and mutually rewarding game requires mastering skill and adjusting to your opponent's abilities. Parkour can be a way to overcome fear and achieve heroism in life.
Competition is not a zero-sum game and requires a well-matched partner to make it a fair and fun game. In optimal competition, micro-victories are necessary for the opponent to not get demoralized and to keep them on the dynamic edge of development. It is important to simultaneously scaffold mastery and self-handicap in ways that are appropriate for the opponent to create a fair game that is mutually rewarding. Incremental behavioral exposure is used to set people in a non-threatening initial, highly structured situation, and then remove constraints as people scaffold up their ability to play. Parkour is a way to challenge the fears inside and do something heroic in life.
The Art of Overcoming Obstacles with Parkour: Practicing parkour can help individuals develop the mentality to see obstacles as opportunities and overcome their fears by taking on physical challenges. It is a form of play that can transform how one approaches life.
Parkour is a discipline that originated in France and teaches people to overcome obstacles by running, jumping and climbing. Practicing parkour can transform an individual and help them develop exploratory locomotor skills or parkour vision. This means that instead of seeing a wall as a barrier, a person practicing parkour will see it as an obstacle they can run up and flip off of. It is also a form of play that allows individuals to experience fear and confront their fears by making a commitment to jump and overcome obstacles. Furthermore, the highest form of mastery is turning the worst obstacle into the most remarkable affordance.
Developing Ourselves through Opponent Processing Activities like Parkour: Engaging in a continual process of development involves creating tension between different systems to grow, learn mastery, and expand our affordances. Parkour and other opponent processing activities can help attune our relevance realization and expand our capabilities.
In order to integrate ourselves with the physical world, other social beings, and transcendence, we need to engage in a continual process of development, which involves the paired reciprocal opponent processing systems of the parasympathetic and sympathetic nervous systems. This process involves embodying a dialogical process and creating tension between different systems to grow, learn mastery, and expand our affordances. Parkour, rough and tumble play, and fine crafting are all opponent processing activities that can help us attune our relevance realization across these fundamental relationships. Anyone can introduce themselves to parkour through exploratory locomotor play and expanding their affordances by getting up and down off the ground in thousands of variations. Creatively transforming obstacles into affordances can also help to stay on the playful edge.
Unlocking Potential through Physical Exploration - A Conversation with Jordan Peterson and Rafe Kelley: By embracing challenges and exploring physical movements, we can unlock untapped potential within our bodies and develop a metaspirit of voluntary challenge, leading to character growth and expanded perspectives.
The conversation between Jordan Peterson and Rafe Kelley highlights the benefits of exploring physical movements and challenges. By varying movements and using both sides of the body, we expand the map of possibilities and unlock unrealised potential within our body at a cellular level. These challenges also develop the spirit of voluntary challenge, which can be seen as a metaspirit that helps in character development. Overall, exploring physical practices can help to unlock new potential for character growth, expand the meaning of the world, and develop a metaspirit of voluntary challenge.
The Transformative Power of Ancestral Communication, Hero Worship, and Integrated Practices: Combining practices that promote integration across different domains leads to improved generalization and balance in character, unlocking implicit potential and achieving transformation. Prioritize the meta game of general adaptation to cultivate courage.
The practice of ancestral communication and hero worship can lead to a realization of our implicit potential and the union with the hero's spirit. However, in order for a practice like parkour to be transformative, it needs to be placed in context with other practices that promote integration across different domains, such as internal integration, integration between people, integration between the sexes, and integration with the natural world. Focusing on one aspect at the expense of others can result in insufficient generalization and imbalance in character. By recognizing the local game as a distraction and prioritizing the meta game of general adaptation, we can cultivate the courage and transformation we seek.
The Five Axes of Human Development: Developing oneself involves focusing on five key aspects - inner relationship, physical environment, object manipulation, social interaction, and spiritual growth. Opponent processing between different practices is key to cultivating wisdom. MovePlay retreats offer a chance to experience holistic development.
In this conversation between Rafe Kelley and Jordan Peterson, Rafe outlines five important axes for human development: the relationship within oneself, the relationship with the physical environment, object manipulation, interaction with others, and spiritual aspects. He emphasizes the importance of not getting trapped in a single subculture or practice and instead cultivating wisdom through opponent processing relationships between different practices. Rafe's enterprise, MovePlay, offers online courses and retreats focused on movement and play as a means of personal development. These retreats are designed to provide a full experience of the different axes of human development.
Deepening Connection with Nature and Others through Physical, Dialogical, and Mindfulness Practices.: Rafe Kelley's retreats offer a unique combination of physical, dialogical, and mindfulness practices, with excursions to beautiful natural spaces. Participants report transformative experiences that have a long-term impact on their lives.
Rafe Kelley offers retreats that combine physical, dialogical, and mindfulness practices for a deeper connection with nature and other individuals. The retreat includes a series of physical and dialogical practices that aim to attune participants to each other and the environment. The retreat also includes excursions to beautiful natural spaces like waterfalls, alpine lakes, and sandy beaches, where people learn to move effectively through the environment, to play games, and to engage in mindfulness practices. Kelley has been offering these retreats for 11 years, and participants report transformative experiences that have a long-term impact on their lives.
The Connection Between Physical Practices and ADHD Diagnoses: Active physical practices can lead to profound experiences and extroversion in children. Our understanding of childhood temperament needs improvement in regards to ADHD diagnoses.
In this section, Rafe Kelley and Jordan Peterson discuss how intense physical practices can bring about a deep sense of connection and profound experience. Rafe shares his experience of being diagnosed with ADHD and dyslexia as a child, and how his behavior was characterized by being physically uncontainable and struggling with the demand to sit still in school. The discussion sheds light on the underdeveloped understanding of childhood temperament and its contribution to ADHD diagnoses. It also touches on the plasticity and stability of personality and how being an active kid can lead to being extroverted. Physical practices and connection can bring about a deep experience, and our understanding of childhood temperament needs improvement when it comes to ADHD diagnoses.
The Role of Temperament in ADHD Diagnoses: People with certain temperaments, like open and exploratory individuals or active and assertive boys, may be misdiagnosed with ADHD in academic settings. Agreeable children may do better, but the neurological marker for ADHD is not reliable.
Temperament plays a big role in ADHD diagnoses. Individuals who are more open, interested in ideas and possibilities, tend to be hyper exploratory, which can cause problems in academic settings such as classrooms. Additionally, boys who are more active and assertive tend to struggle with sitting still and being restrained in classrooms, leading to a potential misdiagnosis of ADHD. Agreeable children, who are compliant and easy to get along with, tend to do better in academic settings, even if their IQ scores are not as high. However, it is important to note that the marker for the neurological element of ADHD, a paradoxical reaction to amphetamines, has been proven false.
Understanding Attention Deficit Disorder and Dyslexia: Attention deficit disorder and dyslexia are not necessarily caused by underlying disorders. Genetics and cultural background can affect their development. Practice and play in childhood can also aid in development.
Rafe Kelley and Jordan Peterson discuss various aspects of attention deficit disorder, dyslexia, and their relationship to neurological abnormalities. Attention deficit disorder is not necessarily related to any underlying disorder, and there is evidence that genetics and cultural background can affect the development of the disorder. Dyslexia may also be related to differences in how individuals perceive and process information, and some people may need more practice to develop automatic processing skills. The role of play and interaction with parents in childhood development can also be important.
Importance of Fathers' Play and Mothers' Observation in Child Development: Encourage fathers to play an active role in their children's lives and trust mothers to observe without interfering. Avoid hyper-feminization and focus on building resilience and confidence in children for long-term success.
Parents should pay attention and not interfere when fathers are playing with their children, especially if the children are laughing and not crying. Mothers should be able to discriminate between what is fun and what is dangerous during play and learn to watch without interfering. The masculine role of providing encouragement for children has been undervalued in our culture, and there is too much hyper-feminization in the way we treat children. Parents should strive to grow their children into highly competent adults by slowly eradicating unnecessary fears and building resilience. Inoculating children with neuroticism and fear is not helpful, and it can lead to demoralization.
Embracing Injury as a Key to Mastery and Encouraging Boisterous Play.: Parents should encourage children to take on challenges while providing a safe environment, avoiding punishment for their natural inclinations for exploration and play. Balance between roles and avoiding demoralizing messages is key to healthy bonding.
The culture today bombards people with demoralizing messages, telling them not to do something that could lead to injury. However, the key is not to avoid injury, but to master it. Parents should encourage their children to take on challenges while guiding them safely. The separation of roles between being a coach and a father is vital, as fathers need to avoid being overbearing. Women face a unique challenge, as they have to pull away from the intense bonding process with the infant to let them explore and play. Parents should be available for their children when needed, providing comfort and security when necessary, and encouraging boisterous play when appropriate. Punishing people for their virtues will only lead to a negative spiral that could cause alienation between fathers and children.
How Fathers and Mothers Can Fulfill Different Roles in Children's Upbringing: Fathers can nurture and mothers can encourage, while teaching children self-defense can prevent victimization and lead to better outcomes in professional settings like law enforcement.
The conversation focuses on how fathers and mothers can fulfill different roles in their children's upbringing. While it is important for both parents to be available to their children's needs, fathers can cultivate their capacity for nourishing and nurturing, while mothers can develop their capacity for encouragement. Moreover, teaching children how to physically defend themselves can be crucial in preventing them from becoming victims of aggression, as well as allowing for calibrated responses to aggression. This latter point is particularly important in professional spheres, such as law enforcement, where a lack of physical competence and lower force-level options can lead to violent outcomes.
The Importance of Physical Play and Exploration in Children: Through play, children can explore physical boundaries and aggression in a safe and controlled environment, helping them develop appropriate responses to complex social situations. Parents and caregivers can facilitate this important learning process through embodied exploration and play.
In a discussion about physical play and exploration in children, Rafe Kelley shares that he played a game of slapping with his daughter and later with his son, carefully calibrating the force to stay within acceptable limits. Through this play, his children were able to explore and understand physical boundaries and aggression in a safe and controlled environment. Jordan Peterson emphasizes the importance of embodied exploration and play in understanding concepts like teasing and slapping, and notes that dogs can also learn through similar play. By providing opportunities for physical exploration, parents and caregivers can help children learn to navigate complex social situations and develop appropriate responses to aggression.
The Importance of Unstructured Play in Child Development: Lack of unstructured playtime can lead to poorly socialized children who lack attention and grace. Narrative and meaning in movement practice are crucial for transformative change, and society needs to reconsider its approach to child development.
The conversation between Rafe Kelley and Jordan Peterson highlights the issue of how society is taking away unstructured play and replacing it with structured play that punishes kids, stifling their ability to self-organize and create self-sustaining games. With the increase of liability concerns, many schools are getting rid of recess entirely. This lack of physical playtime is leading to poorly socialized children who lack grace, articulation, and the ability to initiate attention. Rafe Kelley emphasizes the importance of narrative and meaning in movement practice, and how these elements are crucial in driving transformative change. The conversation ultimately raises the question of whether society is simplifying people's behavior to make them more predictable, and whether this is ultimately beneficial.
The Importance of Physical Practice and Play with Rafe Kelley and Jordan Peterson: Incorporating physical practices and play into our lives can bring higher meaning and act as an antidote to tyranny and slavery. Visit evolve, move play.com to join a community of play practitioners and improve your well-being.
This conversation between Rafe Kelley and Jordan Peterson emphasizes the importance of physical practices and how they can impact us at higher dimensions of ourselves while bringing meaning into the world. They discuss how narratives must be nested within physical practices to reflect the body of theory offered by individuals such as Peterson and John. Additionally, they emphasize the significance of play as the highest form of action and the real sign of mastery. Moreover, they suggest that integrating the spirit of play into your life can act as an antidote to tyranny and slavery. Finally, they encourage individuals to check out Rafe Kelley's website evolve, move play.com to find a community of play practitioners and integrate it into their own lives.
