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    Moses Hacmon on Raising Newborn Elvis, Malibu As a Big Sister & Being a Girl Dad

    enJune 13, 2024

    Podcast Summary

    • Names and identitiesNames and identities hold meaning and impact recognition and experiences in various situations, societal norms influence reactions to them, and capturing moments with family is important.

      Names and identities, whether personal or familial, can hold significant meaning and impact on individuals. Trish from the podcast shares her experience of not knowing her married name and how it affects recognition and experiences in various situations, such as hotels and public events. She also mentions the influence of societal norms and expectations on people's reactions to names and identities. Additionally, they discuss the importance of capturing moments through photos and videos, especially with their young children. Overall, the conversation highlights the significance of names and identities in shaping experiences and connections.

    • Relationship milestonesCouples cherish special moments and milestones in their relationship, such as dressing up and having children, despite the challenges and sacrifices.

      The speaker values the special moments and milestones in their relationship, including dressing up and wearing jewelry together, and the experience of having children. The speaker acknowledges the challenges and sacrifices that come with pregnancy and childbirth, but ultimately finds joy and excitement in the journey. The speaker also expresses admiration and excitement for their partner's accomplishments and appearances. Throughout the conversation, there is a sense of appreciation and celebration for the shared experiences and the evolution of their relationship.

    • New BabyHaving a new baby brings immense joy, love, and challenges, requiring patience, love, and support for the entire family during this time of adjustment

      Having a baby is a significant sacrifice and risk, but the joy and love that comes with it is immeasurable. The speaker expresses her relief and gratitude for a healthy pregnancy and birth, acknowledging the challenges and blessings that come with bringing a new life into the world. The arrival of a new baby also brings changes and adjustments for the entire family, requiring patience, love, and attention to help everyone transition smoothly. The speaker emphasizes the importance of being present and supportive for all family members during this time of change.

    • New Family Member DynamicsAdjusting to a new family member brings unique challenges and responsibilities, including leadership, boundary setting, and communication. Extended family support can help ease the transition.

      Having a new family member, in this case a sister, brings about unique dynamics and challenges. The older sibling takes on a leadership role, providing guidance and support to the younger one. This dynamic can be enjoyable and rewarding, but also comes with its own set of difficulties, such as adjusting to the new situation and asserting boundaries. The presence of extended family members and support systems can help ease the transition and create a positive change for all involved. Additionally, the desire to be a parent is a common desire for many people, and can manifest at various stages in life. Past relationships do not necessarily impact one's ability to be a good parent, but it is important to ensure that one sees the potential partner as a suitable parenting partner. Communication, compromise, and setting boundaries are essential in navigating the new family dynamic and ensuring everyone's needs are met.

    • Relationships and personal growthSelf-reflection, personal growth, and relationships are crucial for a fulfilling life. One's future goals and the value of family should be evaluated regularly.

      Relationships and personal growth are complex and constantly evolving. People change and feelings can shift, making it important to evaluate whether to continue investing in a relationship or not. The speaker shares how they went through a crisis in their early 30s, questioning their future and whether they would be able to achieve their goals, such as owning a home and having a family. However, they eventually found success and met their partner later in life, allowing them to grow together and build a family. The speaker also emphasizes the value of having children, as they bring new blessings and a sense of purpose to one's life. Overall, I took away the importance of self-reflection, personal growth, and the value of relationships and family.

    • Creating supportive environmentEmbrace children's messes, allow free expression, and avoid anger or judgment to create a safe and supportive environment for their development.

      Creating a safe and supportive environment for children to explore and learn is crucial for their development. This includes embracing their messes, allowing them to express themselves freely, and avoiding anger or judgment. The speaker shared her personal experience of observing her daughter's natural curiosity and love for cleaning, which she believes stemmed from this kind of upbringing. Additionally, the speaker reflected on her father's influence, noting that his powerful presence gave her confidence and strength. Overall, the conversation emphasized the importance of providing children with a nurturing and encouraging environment that allows them to grow and discover their unique qualities.

    • Father's strugglesLearning empathy, understanding, forgiveness, acknowledging limitations, and protecting children's innocence from destructive emotions are valuable lessons from dealing with a challenging father figure.

      Growing up with a father suffering from PTSD and narcissistic tendencies was a challenging experience. The speaker recognized her father's struggles and learned valuable lessons, such as the importance of empathy, understanding, and forgiveness. The speaker also realized that anger is not a productive emotion and that acknowledging one's limitations can lead to personal growth. Despite the challenges, the speaker was able to accomplish her father's dreams and provide him with a sense of pride and peace of mind. The experience taught her the importance of protecting and nurturing children's innocence and happiness to shield them from the destructive effects of hate and negativity.

    • Parenting perspectivesUnderstanding past experiences with parents can help in being a more empathetic and open-minded parent, but finding a balance between supporting and protecting is crucial.

      Becoming a parent brings a new perspective on past experiences with one's own parents. The pressure to conform to societal expectations, whether it be in the past or present, can impact parenting decisions. Understanding where one's parents were coming from can help in being a more empathetic and open-minded parent. However, it's essential to find a balance between supporting children and protecting them from harm. The rebellious phase is a natural part of adolescence, and parents must navigate it with understanding and flexibility. The newborn stage brings its own challenges, and each parenting experience is unique.

    • Later in life childrenUnexpected challenges come with having a new baby after raising older children, but older siblings can provide help and participation. Age difference may not matter as much as expected, and finding the right balance is key.

      Having a new baby after raising older children can bring unexpected challenges, such as the lack of communication and the need for adjustment. However, it also comes with benefits, like the help and participation of older siblings. The age difference between children may not matter as much as expected, and some celebrities, like Alec Baldwin, have successfully managed to raise multiple children later in life with the help of a large support system. Ultimately, the key is to find the right balance between being present for your children and providing for them, whether that means being a full-time parent or relying on help from others. The debate on the impact of nannies on children's development is ongoing, but the most important factor is the love and care that parents provide.

    • Childhood discipline and parenting stylesDiffering experiences of discipline shape parenting styles, leading to lenient vs authoritative approaches, but the focus should be on children's growth and development, regardless of gender

      The discussion revolved around the differing experiences of childhood discipline and its impact on parenting styles. While one person described a lack of discipline leading to a more lenient approach, the other shared an experience of strict discipline resulting in a more authoritative approach. Both acknowledged the challenges of differing parenting styles and the importance of finding common ground for the sake of their children. They also touched upon the societal pressure to have a son and the evolving perspectives towards gender roles and expectations. Ultimately, they agreed that the most important factor is the continued growth and development of their children, regardless of gender.

    • Parenting ImpactParenting brings unexpected emotions, responsibilities, and a deep connection. Parents have a significant impact on their child's development and future independence, and may gain a new perspective on life.

      Becoming a parent brings about unexpected emotions and responsibilities. The bond between a parent and child is strong, and the concern for their wellbeing can extend beyond one's immediate family. The early years of a child's life are formative, and parents have a significant impact on their development. Additionally, parents may feel a sense of responsibility to ensure their children grow into strong, independent individuals, providing them with valuable skills and character traits for the future. Furthermore, parents may discover that their perspective on life changes, and they become more empathetic towards the struggles of others, especially children. Overall, parenthood involves a deep connection, constant care, and a long-term investment in the next generation.

    • Second child's impactHaving a second child brings new experiences and makes parents more present and appreciative of their children's unique personalities and moments. Cherish memories through media and respect children's boundaries.

      Having a second child can bring new perspectives and experiences for parents, making them more present and appreciative of their children's unique personalities and moments. The speaker shares how her second child, Malibu, has brought her joy and laughter, and how she cherishes the memories and moments she's able to capture through photos and videos. She also emphasizes the importance of respecting children's boundaries and allowing them to express themselves freely. The speaker's experience highlights the significance of being present and engaged in her children's lives, and the value of creating lasting memories through various forms of media.

    • Authenticity and TraditionThe speaker values authenticity and tradition, and is willing to go the extra mile to obtain it in various aspects of their life, from food and experiences to hospitality and community.

      The speaker values quality and tradition in various aspects of their life, whether it be in food or experiences. They have a strong preference for authenticity and are not afraid to go the extra mile to obtain it. For instance, they use a manual espresso machine to get a sweeter shot, and they are extremely picky about the chocolate they use. Similarly, they take pride in their Italian cooking and hospitality, going above and beyond to make their guests feel welcome. Their dream is to create a gated community where they can own multiple homes and bring together family and friends in a meaningful way. Overall, the speaker's actions and words reflect a deep appreciation for the finer things in life and a commitment to providing memorable experiences.

    • Creating a supportive environment for childrenEncourage self-expression, provide a strong foundation, foster independence, and strive for a beautiful, natural, and self-sustainable setting for children to grow up in. Be accessible parents to build lasting relationships.

      Creating a supportive and nurturing environment for children to explore their creativity and happiness is a key priority for building a fulfilling family life. This can involve encouraging multiple forms of self-expression, providing a strong foundation, and fostering independence and work ethic. The speaker expresses a desire for their children to have the opportunity to grow up in a beautiful and natural setting, while also striving for self-sustainability. They see the importance of being accessible parents, allowing their children to want to spend time with them even as adults. The best part of being a dad, according to the speaker, is the unprompted expressions of love and affection from their children.

    • Love and ConnectionIntentional use of 'I love you' strengthens relationships and brings joy, while technology can help document and share experiences, but it's important to stay connected to the world around us as we age.

      Expressing love and connection, whether through words or actions, is important in maintaining strong relationships. The speaker shares a heartwarming story about her daughter's intentional use of "I love you" and how it brings joy to her life. The discussion also touches on the impact of technology on communication and how it can serve as a means to document and share experiences. Additionally, the speaker reflects on the significance of keeping up with new technologies and staying connected to the world around us, even as we age. Overall, the conversation emphasizes the importance of love, connection, and communication in our lives.

    • Creativity and Plastic PollutionPassionate creativity can lead to unique projects addressing important issues like plastic pollution, even with limited resources. Incorporating family into creative endeavors can also enhance the experience.

      Creativity and passion can lead to unique and meaningful projects, even if they don't come with a large budget. The discussion revolved around an art project using recycled plastic to create a sentient jellyfish, which was intended to raise awareness about plastic pollution. The artist explained that they didn't leave the piece in the ocean and instead recycled it, as they didn't want it to dissolve. They also shared their thoughts on communicating their art and life experiences, expressing that they were focused on their work and didn't consider sharing it publicly as a distraction. Furthermore, the conversation touched on the balance between personal and family life, with the artist expressing their desire to incorporate their children into their creative projects once they're old enough. They also mentioned their enjoyment of designing and making things, which led to the creation of their home studio. The discussion concluded with a reflection on the importance of having fun as a family without relying on significant financial resources. They mentioned that they don't spend much money on leisure activities and instead find joy in their experiences together.

    • Family momentsCreating simple, joyful family moments, like shared meals, activities, and outings, fosters connection, creates cherished memories, and promotes overall well-being.

      Creating simple, joyful family moments, such as shared meals, activities, and outings, brings happiness and contentment. These moments, which may include traditions like weekly pizza nights or outdoor walks, help foster a sense of connection and create cherished memories. Children, in particular, appreciate the consistency and excitement of these experiences, even if they don't fully understand the concept of routine or limitations. Engaging in these activities, both indoors and outdoors, offers a reset and a connection to nature, promoting overall well-being for all family members.

    • Father's Day celebrationsFather's Day celebrations can range from simple to extravagant, depending on personal preferences and circumstances. Prioritize what brings joy and relaxation to each individual for this special day.

      Father's Day celebrations can vary greatly depending on personal preferences and circumstances. Some people may enjoy simple activities like grilling and pool time, while others may prefer more extravagant gestures. Additionally, some individuals may have unique circumstances, such as having their birthday fall on Father's Day, which can impact their celebration plans. Ultimately, it's important to prioritize what brings joy and relaxation to each individual for this special day. The discussion also touched on the idea that some people may feel overlooked or undervalued in their relationships, leading them to express frustration or desire for more recognition.

    • Relationship compatibilityAppreciating each other's ability to handle responsibilities and complementing skills can lead to a fulfilling relationship and starting a family

      The speaker values the compatibility and ease that comes with being in a relationship and starting a family with someone who complements them well. They mention how they weren't initially attracted to each other due to fear, but rather appreciated each other's ability to handle responsibilities and handle aspects of life that the other finds challenging. They also enjoy planning and creating fun experiences together, and hope to continue traveling and having adventures as a family. The speaker expresses excitement about the simplicity and joy of raising children and watching them grow, and appreciates the shared experiences and memories that come with building a life together.

    • Transition to second childThe transition to having a second child can be cherished for its simplicity and peace, and quality time with children is crucial for their emotional wellbeing.

      The transition from having one child to two may not be as daunting as people make it seem. While it requires better management and handling of emotions, it is not something to be feared. The speaker appreciates each stage of her children's lives and finds joy in being present with them. The newborn stage, in particular, is cherished for its simplicity and the peace it brings to the babies. The speaker also emphasizes the importance of spending quality time with children and being there for them, as it helps prevent anxiety and difficult behavior. Overall, the speaker expresses gratitude for her experiences as a mother and the ability to work from home, allowing her to be present for her family.

    • Postpartum self-care and parent-child relationshipDuring postpartum, prioritize self-care, seek help, avoid burdening children with emotions, strive for balanced relationship, stay calm, ask for help, and practice forgiveness.

      Parenting comes with its challenges, especially during the postpartum period. It's essential to prioritize self-care and seek help when needed. Parents should also be mindful of not burdening their children with their emotions or making them feel responsible for them. The relationship between parents and children is crucial, and it's essential to strive for a balanced and healthy dynamic. Staying calm and patient is vital in handling the unexpected challenges that come with parenting. Remember, it's okay to ask for help and lean on support systems when needed. Additionally, forgiveness and understanding of past relationships with parents can lead to healing and growth. Overall, parenting is a journey filled with ups and downs, but with the right mindset and support, it can be a rewarding experience.

    • Daddy-daughter dancesDaddy-daughter dances foster bonding, build confidence, and create cherished memories for children as young as three, providing formal dance experiences and opportunities for fathers to express love and affection.

      Daddy-daughter dances are an important tradition that makes children feel special and build their confidence. These events, which can start as early as age three, provide opportunities for fathers to bond with their daughters and create cherished memories. The dances often involve dressing up, buying corsages, and dancing on stage together. For some, these experiences can be the only formal dance experiences they have, making them feel unique and valued. The tradition continues even into the teenage years, and fathers should strive to make their daughters feel special and loved during these moments. The speakers shared fond memories of their own experiences and looked forward to creating similar memories with their own daughters. Overall, these events contribute to building strong father-daughter relationships and creating lasting memories.

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