Podcast Summary
Relationship needs as inconvenience: Don't let your needs become an inconvenience in a relationship. Prepare for the worst outcome before having a conversation to reduce anxiety and increase the chances of a productive conversation.
It's essential to prioritize your needs in a relationship and not let them become inconveniences. A woman shared her frustration with seeing a man only every couple of weeks and him frequently canceling plans. This situation led her to suppress her needs, which is a common response when people fear losing someone. However, it's crucial not to let this happen on important matters. Instead, ask yourself if you want to be in a relationship where your needs are an inconvenience. To have this conversation, prepare yourself for the worst outcome, such as the end of the relationship. Making peace with this possibility beforehand can help reduce anxiety and increase the chances of a productive conversation. Remember, your needs are not an inconvenience but a fundamental aspect of your happiness. Don't let anyone make you believe otherwise.
Difficult conversations in relationships: Approaching conversations from fear and acquiescence can lead to suffering and anxiety. Prioritize needs and values to find a fulfilling relationship.
Approaching a difficult conversation in a relationship from a place of acquiescence and fear of losing the fantasy of the relationship, rather than from a place of power and readiness for the worst outcome, can lead to suffering and anxiety. If your fundamental needs are not met in a relationship, it may be better to let go of the fantasy and find a relationship that truly makes both parties happy. The speaker encourages those seeking to find their person to prioritize their needs and values, and offers a free training called "Dating with Results" to help them do so.