Life After Divorce Coaching

Today I speak with attorney, and Florida Supreme Court-appointed mediator, Hadas Stagman, about the mediation process and her thoughts on successfully moving towards conflict resolution.

In divorce, there are a lot of things going on that take our focus away from what is important.  Realizing when you are wasting your time on things that do not serve you is key. In this episode I explore my own personal issues staying focused, the choices we make, and why it is important to work on being aware so we can achieve what we want after divorce and for our future.

Have you heard of the saying “Fight or Flight?”Most people have. However, what people don’t consider is staying in the state of “Frozen” as the third option. 

Are you a people-pleaser? When we people please, we are not living an authentic life. In a marriage, or any relationship, when you want a closer and true relationship it is important to be honest with yourself and with the other person.

In this episode, I want to help you think about people-pleasing and where you might be doing this. Knowing why you are people pleasing and how you might be honest in a loving and kind way can open the door to a happier and more authentic life.

When we think we want to end our marriage, it is important to clearly identify why we want the divorce.  Leaving a marriage with expectations that the divorce itself will make us happy without digging deeper is not productive to a better future.  In this episode I want to open your mind to the possibility that leaving your marriage for the right reasons can be done with love and kindness for your spouse and yourself.

Email me at DYaffa@lifebalancelawyer.com with questions or if you have a topic you would like me to discuss.

When we are annoyed at something or someone, we can react from a place of anger or we can take a moment, slow down and think about how we are going to react so that it better serves us. The way we react when we are annoyed can either serve a greater purpose or cause us further  announce. You have a choice. Awareness is key. 

In this episode I discuss some simple techniques to help you slow down, work through your thoughts and the emotion of annoyance and take action from a better place that will make more sense.

If you are contemplating divorce, you will likely struggle with negative thoughts as to why divorcing is a bad idea. Sometimes marriages have run their course. Sometimes it is best to part ways. However, our brain takes us to all the reasons that this is a bad idea. Giving equal airtime to what might be better, if you divorced, is something worth exploring. Is there a possibility that things could work out for the best, that your life could be better? The answer is yes.  In this episode I discuss giving equal airtime to not only the negative of divorce but also the positive. The reality is that things could work out for the best, and you could find the peace and happiness and a new chapter of your life with amazing possibilities.  If you want to explore the possibility that life after divorce could be better than it is now, than listen to this episode.

Why do we tend to think about the negative of our circumstances more than the positive?

What would be different if we gave equal airtime to the positive possibilities or outcomes stemming from our divorce?

If you are stuck in the negative of things, you know that it doesn’t feel good, nor is it useful. In this episode, I explain an easy and powerful tool that helps you to look at the positive (along with the negative) possibilities of any circumstance or situation.

Our brains, many times, tend to automatically look at the negative. In divorce, it's easy to focus on the things that went poorly in the past, are going poorly now, and will go poorly in the future. It’s like an automatic default or negative bias that takes us there without us even realizing it. Giving equal airtime on the positive can make a huge different in your life and propel you to the results you want.

If you want to have a more positive outlook at life, listen to this episode and try it out yourself. Enjoy!

As a close family member of ours has recently passed on,  I am inspired to talk about those relationships we have with our ex’s family members.  You may not have a relationship with your extended family, but your children might and it’s important to support those relationships. 

There's nothing wrong with you, my friend. The reality is that sometimes relationships just end, things change, people change circumstances change, that doesn't reflect on you.  When you are in a relationship and you are in a marriage, you lose some of your self-identity. This is your opportunity to get your power back. You see, the power now is yours to create your future, decide who you are and what you want.

Today is about the new year alternatives to resolutions, like an impossible dream, a 30-day habit, self-care, and your bucket list. Think about these things you deserve! If you've been through a lot or you're going through a lot, there's nothing wrong with taking note of what you want to make a priority.

This is for all those mothers out there who struggle with parenting after divorce.  Pam is a life coach who focuses on helping women gain control over themselves and their kids and parent without guilt.  Listen to her lessons learned and how she has turned her personal experiences into a business of helping other moms.  Go to LessDramaMoreMama.com to find out more about her coaching services!

 What is your financial situation after divorce or what will it look like?  What do you WANT it to look like?  Let’s do an exercise together…I have some questions you need to ask yourself!