Real Talk with Tina and Ann

Guest co-host Denise Bard's book is out!! 30 -second moments and the Women who Raised Me. Listen as she talks about her story and reflects on the moments that define and shape us. Her story is a raw and honest account of triumph over childhood adversity.
Ann and Denise's conversation transcends her personal story, shedding light on making a difference in a child's life. It is a reminder to look past the 'attention-seeking' behavior and look at it as connection seeking. This episode is for anyone who has had someone change the trajectory of their life with a simple act of kindness or if you have done this for someone else.

Join us as we embrace the fact that our past gives us the wisdom we need to equip us to shine in the future.

We are on anywhere you get your podcasts and...
Real Talk with Tina and Ann are now on WDJYFM.com,
You can watch us on PacificCoastTV . link is We are on anywhere you get your podcasts and...
Real Talk with Tina and Ann are now on WDJYFM.com,
PacificCoastTV  link is
http://pacificcoast.tv/video/the-world-through-trauma-s-eyes?fbclid=IwAR1kdNbaqDJNokd4z_-LdpnKM_9mgr4Qi1-HCwolUYkfLtJnSMOUfVSyhvI

Colorado radio station is coming soon. We are very thankful and blessed for our continual growth. Thank you to all of our listeners and now watchers. 
and a future Colorado station. 

We are very thankful and blessed for our continual growth. Thank you to all of our listeners and now watchers. 

This episode was inspired by a statement made in Kara Swisher's recent book, The Burn Book. Tina and Ann discuss how Trauma changed them for...wait for it...the better? How can that happen. Well, trauma is not what made them better, but their strength, determination and resilience changed trauma's path. 

The two discuss how their trauma actually made them stronger and more determined. Ann realized that her creativity was born in the pain and isolation of her bedroom.. Tina learned how to hyperfocus to get through and overcome.

They two learned how that simple is good, family is everything and how to break the cycle. Ann learned one of life's most important lessons that got her through. 

Join this twisty, curvy podcast and learn more of how Trauma shaped them and how they rose above their circumstances. 

The Book A Loss that Lasts Forever by Kara Swisher is mentioned
The Sinful Woman by Ann Kagarise is mentioned

A quote was used by William Martin from The Parent's Tao Te Ching 

Quote: There is no timestamp on trauma. There isn't a formula that you can insert yourself into to get from horror to healed. Be patient. Take up space. Let your journey be the balm." Dawn Serra

A quote by Plutarch: "What we change inwardly will change outer reality.

We are on anywhere you get your podcasts and...
Real Talk with Tina and Ann are now on WDJYFM.com, 
PacificCoastTV  link is http://pacificcoast.tv/video/the-world-through-trauma-s-eyes?fbclid=IwAR1nQmmdp30K5eVgRzk4Eksn6fhQyKQ54bQzgj8_HPTYZBdMchS2TJ7UCvM, 
and a future Colorado station. 

We are very thankful and blessed for our continual growth. Thank you to all of our listeners and now watchers. 

When the ground beneath you shakes, trust can crumble into dust. That's the stark reality for many who've walked through the storm of trauma, a journey Tina and Ann understand all too well. Do we keep up our walls, open a window, or build a bridge of trust.  Our intimate stories serve as beacons for those navigating the murky waters of skepticism, where accepting a compliment or a hand extended in kindness becomes an act of bravery. Throughout this raw and revealing episode, we discuss transforming barriers into connection, while never losing sight of the need for safety.

As we wade deeper into the conversation, the ghosts of generational trauma emerge, challenging us to sever the chains of the past. We examine how personal healing is not just a solitary endeavor but a communal crusade to prevent the cycle from continuing.   It's a testament to the quiet power of patience and understanding in fostering bonds of trust that can survive the test of time.

Psychology Today is referenced.
Trauma, Trust, and Time | Psychology Today

Quotes:  "Not let someone else's chaos dictate me." Tina
"The trauma isn't our fault, but it's our responsibility to heal it."
"Sometimes change happens slowly, but that's ok because direction is more important than speed."
"If someone is poking you where you hurt, they don't deserve to be in your life." Ann
"Losing trust in self can lead to hopelessness."



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Every year, as the calendar circles back to the day we said goodbye to a loss, we find solace in the small rituals we've created to honor memories. Today's episode is a tender exploration of how we navigate the poignant anniversaries of loss—be it a loved one's passing, a divorce, or any pivotal goodbye. Together,, we share stories close to the heart, like enveloping ourselves in the comfort of a departed mother's favorite TV shows and the emotions that surge on a final outing that becomes a cherished memory. We also discuss the diverse traditions people embrace, from savoring a favorite meal to the release of butterflies, each a testament to the enduring bond with those we've lost.

As we clutch the keepsakes that tether us to the past, we embark on a journey through the landscape of loss and the memories that accompany it. Our conversation traverses the emotional significance of these mementos and the myriad ways they can catapult us through time to relive both joyous and sorrowful moments. , We address the complexity of grief, underscoring the need for support as we face those anniversaries that inevitably return us to the age and circumstance of our heartache. This episode is an intimate look at the myriad faces of grief, the regrets and misconceptions surrounding the decline of a loved one, and the invisible pain of missing shared moments due to illness, all while maintaining a facade of normality. Join us in this heartfelt dialogue as we acknowledge the silent struggles and celebrate the memories that shape our stories of loss.

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Tina and Ann get nostalgic in the complex tapestry of emotions that anniversaries weave into our lives. We unfurl the delicate threads of joy, heartache with reconciling past grievances with love and understanding. It's a journey through the winding roads of grief, where sorrow and celebration often hold hands. 

 The dialogue ventures into the realm of bittersweet realizations, recognizing the absence of loved ones in future triumphs and the heavy weight of 'unfinished business' that lingers after their departure. We also share the treasures that keep the essence of those lost, like cherished keepsakes and recorded voices, close to our hearts. Our conversation is a testament to the complex dance of memories, the solace found in the company of friends, and the solitary moments of reflection that anniversaries bring.

 Join us as we navigate this multifaceted emotional landscape together, finding unity in the shared experience of remembrance and loss.

We ask you to check out Denise Bard's new book, 30-second moments and the Women Who Raised me on Amazon. Denise is a permanent guest host on Real Talk with Tina and Ann and we are so proud of her!! 

Follow us on Tina and Ann's website  https://www.realtalktinaann.com/
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or at:  podcastrealtalktinaann@gmail.com or annied643@gmail.com
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As Ann and Charde Young ( Love Freely) wrap up this three-part series, they continue their conversation on doing it afraid and the beautifulness of being vulnerable. They inspire many as they talk family secrets, betrayal, their search for self-acceptance and how affirmations guide them toward self-love as they try to light the path for others. 

The two discuss how their creative sides can touch more than a canvas or a page, but it can also brush the human heart.

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A personal message from Ann. She gets personal and candid after reading Mariska Hargitay's (Olivia Benson from SVU) article in People Magazine and saw her interview on the Today Show. Ann gets honest and talks about Mariska's situation and how to take pain and turn it into helping others. She discusses showing your true self, scars and all. S

 Having been a director at a battered woman's shelter and a rape crisis hotline, Ann delves into the often-misunderstood response of freezing during an assault and the web of blame and shame that survivors navigate. We stand together with those who have had to face such strength. 

The episode touches on abuse with people who have disabilities or pre-existing trauma. Ann talks grooming and how chillingly proficient abusers are in identifying their targets.  She discusses the reality of not belng believed by those in trusted, authoritative positions. Her main goal is to bring a voice to survivors. 

Ann briefly shares why she has dedicated this episode to her sister and to anyone who has holds the weight of unspoken secrets. 

You don't have to suffer by yourself or in silence. 

Vulnerability equals strength.  Authentic, emotional bravery vs. societal pressures of concealment. Charde Young, also known as Love Freely, as we discuss how our toughest moments can lead us to profound growth and authenticity fosters genuine connections.

Destiny vs. Choice. Was your path chosen for you or do you choose your path. Can we find life's purpose amidst the chaos. Charde and Ann discuss the lives that were given them and the paths that they chose to change their trajectory.

The two discuss the narratives that we inherit and the ones we write for ourselves. They get pretty personal as they unlock their diaries so they can rewrite their stories. 

Join us for this intimate exchange where the personal becomes universal and self-discovery becomes a transformation.

Follow us on Tina and Ann's website  https://www.realtalktinaann.com/
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In this episode of Real Talk with Tina and Ann, Ann interviews Charde young who is also known as Love Freely, on stage. Charde is in several bands. She is one of the singers in Apostle Jones, a band that has been named, Best Band in Cleveland, Ohio. She has two of her own bands, Mixed Feelings and New Vibe. She also has performed with Tropidelic. She has been on stage, live painting with Gladys Knight's drummer, Eljah Gilmore, while he performed. She is also a teacher. She is one busy lady who is making a difference in the world. Her entire purpose is to touch lives, to inspire and to remind people that they matter and are loved. The entire podcast centers around Doing it Afraid. Everything is found on the other side of fear. We talk about doing it with Shame and we discuss how you are not our circumstances. I would say her mantra would be, I am not confident, I am courageous. Often times, we do not know what we are doing, but we keep doing it. lol. Give yourself permission to succeed. 

Imagine standing at the edge of your fear with the nudge to fly. This episode is about embracing that leap, despite the fear that tries to control us. We share intimate conversations about the hurdles of stage fright, the courage to confront personal fears, and the liberation found when asking ourselves, "What would you do if you weren't scared?" Through Charde's story of self-discovery with herself and her bands, we celebrate the strength that comes from stepping outside comfort zones, proving that growth often requires a dance with fear.

Acts of kindness can be both simple and revolutionary. We delve into the heartwarming power of a touch, a hug, or words of encouragement and their ability to lift spirits and change lives. Addressing the significance of making others feel seen and valued, we share personal stories that underscore the transformative effects of kindness, the importance of community, and how vulnerability can be a source of strength. Charde Young leaves us with a promise to two more episodes in this three-part series. We cannot wait to listen.
This is the beginning of our second season. 

When our own childhood traumas resurface in the role of a parent, the journey takes on a deeper significance. In the intimate space of this episode, Ann shares the story of her son's struggle at school, an ordeal that brought forth her buried yearnings for protection and understanding. This isn't just a narrative about the challenges we face; it's a celebration of the unbreakable bonds we form with our children.

The dance of affection within our families can be tricky, especially for those with past traumas. . We discuss communication, self-forgiveness, and the individual needs of each family member. 

Finally, we turn to the frontlines of parenting—the advocacy for our children's emotional well-being within the school system. Ann gets personal about the difficult choices made to defend her son's happiness and zest for learning. As we unpack the distressing incident with his teacher, we highlight the power of trusting our parental instincts. This episode is for every parent who's ever fought for their child's well-being and also had abuse, themselves. 

*I mistakenly state that it is our 51st episode. Well this had been a 3 part series, but we are ending this on our 52nd episode which means the end to this first season. Next week, will be the first episode of our second exciting season. Thank you so much! 
* I apologize for some noise, at times, in this episode. But lol, we got a lot of it removed, but some of it would not GO lol. It is Ann's kids playing on holiday break. So, we just go with it. Flaws and all. lol Thanks for listening! 

Quotes used in the episode: 

• “Let us reach out to the children. Let us do whatever we can to support their fight to rise above their pain and suffering.” - Nelson Mandela
• “We worry about what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget that he is someone today.” - Stacia Tauscher
• “It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.” - Frederick Douglass
• “Children need models rather than critics.” - Joseph Joubert

Follow us on Tina and Ann's website  https://www.realtalktinaann.com/
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or at:  podcastrealtalktinaann@gmail.com or annied643@gmail.com
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Embarking on a journey through the trials of motherhood and the quest for personal growth, We discuss profound ways our own upbringing shaped our approach to raising our children. With raw honesty, we share the pivotal transformation we underwent to provide our kids with what we never had—a cycle of nurturance over abuse. Every parent faces unique hurdles. We confront the delicate balance of discipline and communication, and how we evolved from a place of anger to one of calmness and constructive dialogue. This episode is a testament to the power of self-awareness and the relentless pursuit of self-improvement on the path to becoming the parent our children deserve.

Follow us on Tina and Ann's website  https://www.realtalktinaann.com/
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or at:  podcastrealtalktinaann@gmail.com or annied643@gmail.com
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When the echoes of our past traumas surface as we navigate the waters of parenthood, the journey can be complex. Denise and Ann open up about the raw, emotional challenges they've faced in an attempt to parent effectively without their fears and experiences overshadowing our children's growth. From confronting the specter of inappropriate behavior to instilling the principles of consent and personal boundaries, we traverse the thin line that separates vigilance from overprotection. Our candid stories shed light on the complexities of safeguarding our kids while not encasing them in our shadows.

As we unpack the impact of our own traumas on the way we raise our little ones, you'll hear about some of our own encounters. We also tackle the oft-avoided topic of abuse, discussing how to break the silence and educate our kids on right and wrong touches, particularly with regard to children who perceive the world differently, like those on the autism spectrum. Denise shares her insight on negotiating the minefield of age-appropriate conversations and handling situations where boundaries may inadvertently be crossed. Together, we offer an unguarded look into the heart of parenting through trauma, hoping to empower other parents grappling with similar battles.

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When the heartache of loss intertwines with the courage to embark on new beginnings, we find ourselves at life's most pivotal crossroads. While we have moments of sorrow, we find strength at the dawn of new chapters.

Navigating the complexities of life doesn't come without its trials.  Our conversation weaves through what shapes our journey, confronting fear, Each new chapter brings a new path, individuality, highlighting how every decision and experience polishes our readiness to grasp what life has to offer.

We peel back the layers of unworthiness and trauma and find solace in the wisdom of  "The Velveteen Rabbit," we embrace the process of becoming 'real." This episode isn't just a story; it's an invitation to join in recognizing the strength drawn from becoming our truest selves.

Follow us on Tina and Ann's website  https://www.realtalktinaann.com/
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 Our latest episode offers an intimate glimpse into the dichotomy of the winter months, from the warm glow of family gatherings to the cold touch of loneliness and loss. We recount our own experiences, and share how the festivities can sometimes deepen the shadows for those grappling with grief , emotional pain or health challenges,  With recollections of personal sorrow and family adjustments, we open up a space for understanding and empathy, reaching out to anyone who might be silently aching amidst the holiday cheer.

As the conversation unfolds, we shine a light on the hidden battles many face with Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) and the valuable strategies to combat its gloom. From Tina's personal story with  light therapy lamps to CBT Therapy, we offer hope and practical advice for those feeling the winter blues. Our stories extend to the classroom, where we stress the importance of empathy and connection for children facing educational challenges. We call on listeners to take small, meaningful actions that can immensely uplift someone's spirit—not just during the holidays, but all year round.

Follow us on Tina and Ann's website  https://www.realtalktinaann.com/
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Have you ever questioned the saying "God won't give you more than you can handle" and wondered if maybe, just maybe, He does? This deep and meaningful conversation tackles that very thought, highlighting how our trials can draw us closer to Him. We share our journey of understanding trauma as a love language and the unique healing paths we've taken, including supporting our children through equine therapy. We also share a personal encounter with toxicity, underscoring the importance of eliminating harmful influences from our lives.

Trust and empathy: two words that hold immense power in our lives. Reflecting on our personal experiences, we shed light on the immense challenge of trusting others and the critical role a circle of trusted individuals plays. We dissect the damage caused by a lack of empathy, and even delve into the manipulative technique of gaslighting. Wrapping up, we take a moment to appreciate you, our incredible listeners, for your support on our journey and the evolution of our YouTube channel, Everything Spectrum. So, come along and join the conversation – it's deep, it's honest, it's real.

Follow us on Tina and Ann's website  https://www.realtalktinaann.com/
Denise Bard's website: https://denisebard.com/
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What goes on in the mind and in the healing when a person walks the same streets where trauma occurred. Returning to these places can trigger positive and negative emotions. Sometimes, revisiting a place tied to distressing memories can help us gain understanding or find a sense of peace. Sometimes it shows how far we have grown since the event occurred. Ann’s visit to her dad’s grave, for the first time after 20 plus years, came when she wanted to share him with her kids. 

Denise is working on a book that took her back to her childhood area. She spoke with teachers and was feet away from onf of the home she lived in, with her mom. Listen as the pair discuss how revising places of trauma can impact our lives and possibly bring healing and closure. 

The pair also discuss how trauma impacted major life choices. Ann shares a major decision she made when she was told she could HAVE her childhood home. She shares a hilarious story that reveals another side and also talks about a year that she has never discussed before on the podcast. This episode is very revealing as they reveal how walking the same streets might help find strength for some, while others may need to distance themselves, to heal and grow. Reflecting on our emotions can aid in processing these difficult memories.

Follow us on Tina and Ann's website  https://www.realtalktinaann.com/
Denise Bard's website: https://denisebard.com/
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or at:  podcastrealtalktinaann@gmail.com or annied643@gmail.com
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Tina and Ann delve into quotes that have echoed in many hearts and souls. Does God give us more than we can handle? Tina and Ann have a very interesting discussion on these words. This quote-filled episode is carefully guided through the topics of boundaries, healthy healing, healthy grieving, ridding of toxic relationships,  the importance of advocating and empowering insights to help carry you through your day.

Do words change our perspective? Does a quote whisper to our soul and understand us, at our depths? Can a quote mean something different to two different people and change meaning through time.  Join us as we talk the power of quotes, their personal resonances, and the dual interpretations that Tina and Ann have. Tina has been gone during a difficult time and she shares why she brings these quotes to the episode and Ann discusses quotes she learned from Alcoholics Anonymous and their meaning in her life. 

This is a deep dive on a very interesting, thought-provoking topic.

Go to realtalktinaann.com and leave us your email in the contact section and you will get a special message from Ann. Leave us a voicemail on our website and you might end up on our podcast.

Follow us on Tina and Ann's website  https://www.realtalktinaann.com/
Denise Bard's website: https://denisebard.com/
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or at:  podcastrealtalktinaann@gmail.com or annied643@gmail.com
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Holiday Breaks. We're not talking about the joy of time off school, but rather the anxiety and fear that can come with the loss of the safety and support provided by the school environment. Ann and Guest Host Denise share deeply personal experiences to shine a light on this often overlooked aspect of the holiday season.

Our discussions dive deep into the crucial role teachers play during this time, providing a sense of security and positivity for students, particularly those coming from challenging circumstances.   For these children, a teacher can unknowingly become a lifeline, providing love, stability and a sense of normalcy that might be lacking at home. A simple act, a moment of positivity, can make a world of difference.

Listen to learn what schools do and can do to help make a hurting child's lifeline feel like a thought away.  Ann shares what it was like to help the children whose parents were incarcerated during the holidays and to remember those who are in shelters and not in their normal home environment. 

Holiday season can also bring up painful memories and emotions for those who have experienced trauma or come from difficult family situations. Ann and Denise open up about their own struggles of navigating the holidays, the pressure to create new traditions, and the yearning for a sense of belonging.  There's power in personal connection, and sometimes, a small act of kindness can mean more than any material gift. Tune in to this episode of Real Talk as they end with a challenge to all. 

Go to realtalktinaann.com and leave us your email in the contact section and you will get a special message from Ann. Leave us a voicemail on our website and you might end up on our podcast.

Follow us on Tina and Ann's website  https://www.realtalktinaann.com/
Denise Bard's website: https://denisebard.com/
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or at:  podcastrealtalktinaann@gmail.com or annied643@gmail.com
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Born with a severe Cleft Palate, half a nose and told he would never learn, Dr. Don Bartlette has a story of overcoming and hope. He lived in a small shack in North Dakota. His father left him and his mother because of his disabilities. Don would steal to eat and his best friends were the rats.  

"One White Woman," he states, believed in him, changing his life forever. This man who didn't even speak until the age of 12, became valedictorian of his high school and got his doctorate in Special Education to help others. All because one person believed in him. 

Left to die by doctors, locked in a janitors closet by his teacher, tied to a tree by peers, this man shares a tear jerking podcast of hope and resilience and how that one woman taught him what a shower was, how to eat, and how to learn.

Listen  to his main message of LOVE as he states that Hate can be Overcome by Love. Don talks about his wife, his kids and the house he lives in today.  Listen to why he left his political party and his church but still, in spite of it all, has maintain his faith.

This episode reveals racism, judgment, perseverance and love.

The story of his life is chronicled in the book, Macaroni at Midnight.
He also has volunteered for Chick- fil-A for 36 years and is an active volunteer in his community.

Go to realtalktinaann.com and leave us your email in the contact section and you will get a special message from Ann. Leave us a voicemail on our website and you might end up on our podcast.

Follow us on Tina and Ann's website  https://www.realtalktinaann.com/
Denise Bard's website: https://denisebard.com/
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or at:  podcastrealtalktinaann@gmail.com or annied643@gmail.com
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A personal message from Ann. You have to listen to hear it!


Go to realtalktinaann.com and leave us your email in the contact section and you will get a special message from Ann. Leave us a voicemail on our website and you might end up on our podcast.

Follow us on Tina and Ann's website  https://www.realtalktinaann.com/
Denise Bard's website: https://denisebard.com/
Facebook: Real Talk with Tina and Ann | Facebook
or at:  podcastrealtalktinaann@gmail.com or annied643@gmail.com
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