brooke dillman

For some reason, Edda or Amos (here sometimes referred to as Edna and Otis) has gone through a wormhole and now Polly and Lolly are older. How much older? Well, we think The Master intended them to be some specific age (probably because he couldn't wait for them to reach the age of consent, because he is a monster), but the way they are drawn from strip to strip makes it impossible to tell what age that is. Are they supposed to be in their early 20s? Mid-40's? 30s? Also, is there a reason (other than poor execution of course) that they both now have black hair which is going gray? So very fucking weird. There seems to be no reason for Polly and Lolly to have "time traveled" from an "alternative reality" other than to come raid Edda's closet for dresses. (EDITOR'S NOTE: it's ALWAYS alternate reality, no one has ever said alternative reality...until now.) Of course, daughters wearing their mom's clothes is a regular thing in this strip and it ALWAYS makes the mom mad. For some fucking reason. There is so much creepiness and grossness here that it was upsetting for us, including (but not limited to) the strip about Polly and Lolly as children talking about how they enjoy watching their parents dream about having sex. So, yeah, totally normal shit going on here, guys. Look, on this episode, it probably seems like we're just jumping into the middle of an ongoing story while ignoring the necessary prelude. And in a way we are. But here's the thing: We go back and do the research and Ol' Bee Mac-El-Dee plopped us down here with no real explanation. Because he's Just. That. Good. There's a sequence a couple of weeks before this where Edda is launched off a swing into space, but that's as close to a logical explanation as you're ever going to get in this god-forsaken comic. The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: You can find all of the strips either on Twitter by clicking here (https://x.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1763657388417339809?s=20), or on Instagram by clicking here (https://www.instagram.com/p/C3_Amuyv-Zr/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link&igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==). This episode, which exists in an alternative reality, includes: Running in Griffith Park The Perfect Crime Time-Jumping Edna & Otis Twins Prematurely graying Coors Light "...and twins (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OjaNL3J5Qik)" commercial Victorian Wasp Waist (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wasp_waist) The Ol' Ben Franklin Weird hands/crab claws The Ring girl (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hPtP_dfZXxc) Beaver shots Singin' in the Rain Boris Pasternak (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boris_Pasternak) Alternate realities Little Lord Fauntleroy (https://www.amazon.com/Little-Lord-Fauntleroy-Ricky-Schroder/dp/B00000F4P6) Playing jacks Improper interrobang usage Mannequin legs Stilts Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE). And we're on Instagram: @9ChickweedRage (https://www.instagram.com/9chickweedrage/).

What better way to start the new year than to take a look at the first Chickweed Lanes of 2024? Well, I guess it might be better to NOT look at them at all. But that's really not on the table for us, now, is it? Please excuse Jeff sounding like he's broadcasting from inside a tin can. He was literally inside a tin can. Once again, get ready to enjoy some smooth jazz segues, because the technical problems again befall us. But we soldier on and find ourselves back in the world of ear-kissing and the familiar restaurant booths with seat-backs of varying heights (and nothing on the tables of course). Xiulan insists that her husband Hugh kiss Edda's ear, which he does without hesitation. Polly and Lolly practice piano, which for some fucking reason bothers Edda. There's more about kissing ears, then Amos decides to kiss Edda's neck, which is so very difficult what with all of the fucking turtlenecks everywhere. Then we end our episode with more Polly and Lolly. It's shocking (or is it?) that a random sampling of the first 8 strips from 2024 give us all of the things that are so tiresome and annoying about the strip. That, we suppose, is the genius of Brooke Mac-El-Dee. The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: You can find all of the strips either on Twitter by clicking here (https://x.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1751963970750325138?s=20), or on Instagram by clicking here (https://www.instagram.com/p/C2r74dyL7EK/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link&igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==). This fully turtlenecked episode includes: Jazz! Lalo Schifrin Champagne Turtlenecks! Greedo (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y2cajwgDyLM) from Star Wars Rectum? Hell, it killed 'em both! McEldowney Ellipsis Ear kissing Even more turtlenecks! Piano practice So many turtlenecks! Kissing your Ben Franklin The jazz flute (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_c_ufaxeSTs) from Anchorman Full William Frawley Connect Four (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P0rFtlKZk30) Winnie the Pooh Attack of the 50-Foot Woman Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE). And we're on Instagram: @9ChickweedRage (https://www.instagram.com/9chickweedrage/).

After becoming convinced that Brooke Mac-El-Dee himself is listening to this podcast, we take a deep dive into his poor history with the ellipsis (and other punctuation). You see, in one strip, he makes a point of "educating" everyone about the use of an ellipsis. According to The Master, it is only used to indicated omitted words. And that is not only not true, it is also not how he has EVER used the ellipsis in his own work. In fact, we're not sure he has used it that way even once. So we go back through the strips we've already discussed and actually count the periods. (So many periods.) We also talk about a handful of strips where he "has fun" with punctuation with "hilarious" results. All in all, a fitting way to end the year. The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: You can find all of the strips either on Twitter by clicking here (https://x.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1740402215402283477?s=20), or on Instagram by clicking here (https://www.instagram.com/p/C1Zx41jrT4n/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link&igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==). This ..... episode includes: Sneezing Diet Cokes Christmas Back trouble riding a Segway spot-eyed cats semi-colon misuse Ross & Rachel Sam & Diane Katniss & Peeta motorboating Eddie Izzard talks about Englebert Humperdinck (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yjaRR4ofudA) Underwood Farms Goat habitrail Goat poop Welcome Back, Kotter Peanuts Comma splice Kilroy Was Here Tiger Beat Leif Garrett Shaun Cassidy William Frawley's pants (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jtmC2I8K6mo) Mowgli from The Jungle Book The Dark Crystal Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE). And we're on Instagram: @9ChickweedRage (https://www.instagram.com/9chickweedrage/).

It's the big day for Xiulan Ha'Penny Yuan and Hugh Portwhistle Godalming. For some reason, Xiulan has chosen Edda to be one of her two bridesmaids, because of course and why not? Look, Edda is a small part of a wedding that isn't her wedding, so naturally she's furious that someone else is getting all the attention. She has a plan to not only "go commando" underneath her cheongsam, but to "slink up the aisle like hookers short on crazy money." She thinks this would be a fun and funny thing to do at someone else's wedding. And I guess we are supposed to be charmed by this. Oh, that Edda! Typical Edda! What's not to love about her? Seth warns her and Ginger, Xiulan's friend and the other bridesmaid, not to do what they're planning, and Edda gets very mad about it. Xiulan yells at the two of them on the way down the aisle. Edda then sticks her tongue out at Seth, again, on the way down the aisle. Once at the altar, Hugh makes exclaiming "cor lumme" when he sees Xiulan. She makes fun of him for that. At the altar. But then tells him that she and her bridesmaids (who are sitting in the pews now?) are all going commando. They talk about this for a while. At the altar. Instead of getting the wedding going. The priest interrupts and then reveals he has also gone commando. We discover that other people have gone commando too. Then for some reason the priest gets mad about it. The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: You can find all of the strips either on Twitter by clicking here (https://x.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1726452275160519165?s=20) or on Instagram by clicking here (https://www.instagram.com/p/Cz2o8NkL4rm/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link). This completely underwear-free episode includes: wing-tip collars pet collars "I'm Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman" by Britney Spears (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IlV7RhT6zHs) Dutch angles! Cheongsams Very bad hand drawings The McEldowney Ellipsis! Going commando Pheromones Pig Latin Ealing Comedies The Church of England Cockney Slang Adam Godley Astronomical ellipsis usage! Reading glasses Marty Feldman Bing Crosby Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE). And we're on Instagram: @9ChickweedRage (https://www.instagram.com/9chickweedrage/).

Despite repeated mysterious technical difficulties, Brooke and Jeff persevered to bring you the 30th installment of this very important podcast. Was it worth all of the trouble? Of course the answer is no, probably not. But we begin with the aftermath of a date between Gil and Janice, the Nicolette Cignet photographer and Edda's friend and rival from the dance company we met way back in Episode 24: They Wanted You to Model Because of Sitzfleisch Allure (https://www.9chickweedrage.com/024). Gil is getting advice from Seth and Mark and tells them that he did not in fact bone Janice at the end of the date (which was their expectation), but instead kissed her on the left corner of her mouth. This move, according to Mark, is akin to "lighting a sensual fuse." Edda doesn't believe it, but Amos tries it and transports them to a series of famous romantic movies. First La Dolce Vita, then From Here to Eternity, Casablanca, It Happened One Night (which Jeff mistakenly places in 1939 instead of 1934, sorry!), before veering to North By Northwest and settling into the Tarzan canon. There are so many Tarzan strips, guys. It's all very, very stupid. But we soldiered on through multiple glitches and made it happen. Just for you! Also, Jeff tries really hard to explain Schrödinger's Cat to make a metaphorical point, only to fail in his explanation and then to fail to remember exactly why he was trying to make the point in the first place. The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: You can find all of the strips either on Twitter by clicking here (https://x.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1718430506940059796?s=20) or on Instagram by clicking here (https://www.instagram.com/p/Cy9o0MipPU7/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link&igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==). This kiss-induced dream episode includes: KU vs. MU Mullets Coup d'etat Bartleby the Scrivener Fletch talks about the filth and gunk (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SjJYNZirQCU) Nicolette Sheridan/Nicolette Cignet Kevin Smith George Santos and Steve Bannon Form-fitting turtleneck mini-dress DTF Turtlenecks Ellipses! Ezio Pinza singing (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ktvnNhwBaeY) "Some Enchanted Evening" from Some Enchanted Evening Records on 78 The Library of Congress Ball-cupping Beavers The Trevi Fountain (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PIz-BgNYN20) from La Dolce Vita Gumby Form-Fitting Neck-Brace Turtleneck From Here to Eternity Casablanca It Happened One Night North By Northwest Tarzan Obstetrics Laurel & Hardy Schrödinger's Cat (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schr%C3%B6dinger%27s_cat) explained so much better than Jeff tried to Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE)

Well, we've been gone for two months but we're back! And if you thought that this stupid comic strip wasn't still stupid, boy, are you in for a rude awakening! All the same old shit is still there: turtlenecks, Dutch angles, references to starlets of the '30s and '40s, no backgrounds, the McEldowney ellipsis! Oh, how did we survive all these weeks without these? Anyway, this stupid storyline is about Juliette and her boyfriend Elliott, whom everyone hates. (Including us!) One version of this story would be to say that he shows up to propose to her and ends up in the hospital. But it's all so fucking convoluted and the story changes with each new development. At first, Juliette is pretty confident that Elliott might pop the question, but she's not certain, so she wears a sexy dress to help him "pop." But later we discover that he proposes to her on a weekly basis. Then, we find out that the minute Elliott walked through the door, he inhaled a cough drop and needed medical attention. But later, we're told that he didn't inhale the cough drop until after she said yes. But even later, we're told that her dress caused him to have "an episode." And a doctor tells us that he inhaled a cough drop but then had an arrhythmia. Anyway, none of it makes any sense, especially the part where Elliott ends up in the ICU for more than a day. To confuse things even more, Brooke and Jeff talk about the ICU like it's the Emergency Room. But then again, that seems to be interchangeable with Brooke Mac-El-Dee as well. Later, a cat motorboats Juliette's boobs. And in the end, no one really gives a shit about what happened to Elliott because they're too busy talking about Juliette's dress. Spoiler alert: She's the sexiest person in the ICU and she loves it! The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: Edda and Juliette mention Jean Harlow, Juliette promises to make Elliott "pop," Elliott chokes on his cough drop, and a doctor stares at Juliette's boobs are here (https://x.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1710366406557220951?s=20). The "lethal, shrink-wrap, halter-top gown," Edda getting mad because her gay roommate thinks her mom is sexier, and Juliette looking hot (and enjoying it) in the ICU are here (https://x.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1710366408151056421?s=20). A cat motorboats Juliette's boobs, Amos talks about his fetid corpse, and Elliott somehow on his deathbed are here (https://x.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1710366410550190305?s=20). This lethal, shrink-wrapped episode includes: Dive, Dove, Doven? Phones, both corded and cordless Auntie Mame Turtlenecks! Jean Harlow Fisher-Price Little People (https://shop.mattel.com/collections/little-people) Dutch Angles! The character design from [Shark Tale](https://www.google.com/search?scaesv=569938233&sxsrf=AM9HkKlxERVw5MfqrxGptUaJi-AqJDQ4g:1696289606532&q=A+shark+tale&tbm=isch&source=lnms&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjcxLubw9iBAxVXJEQIHaNEPUEQ0pQJegQIDhAB&biw=1301&bih=802&dpr=2). No backgrounds! Cough drops Jolly Ranchers Arrhythmia Chekhov's Gun (https://www.masterclass.com/articles/writing-101-what-is-chekhovs-gun-learn-how-to-use-chekhovs-gun-in-your-writing) Les Nessman's bandages (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Les_Nessman) The McEldowney ellipsis! Crystal Gayle Being motorboated by a cat The ICU Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE)

Inspired by the 4th of July (I guess), we go all the way back to the beginning and take a look at the very first Chickweed strips. Brooke Mac-El-Dee comes right out of the gate with Juliette talking with Edda about physical attractiveness and how that's very important to catch a man. Edda at this point is maybe 12, so this is a TOTALLY NORMAL AND APPROPRIATE conversation for a mother to have. But don't worry. Things get WAY MORE inappropriate pretty quickly. Isn't it comforting to know that this horrible comic strip was horrible in exactly the same ways from the beginning? Following up Juliette's lessons in female attractiveness, pre-teenage Edda already expresses what can only be described as Championship Level Body Dysmorphia. Classic Mac-El-Dee! There's a whole Sunday strip about a fly. Twelve-year-old Amos, who looks either drowned or electrocuted or both, spends an entire strip sniffing Edda...at her request of course. Sophia Loren's "bosom" is described as "proud." Edda shames her mother for not getting boned on a date. Then later the two of them celebrate Juliette finding her boyfriend's "button" and "pushing it." Which I suppose means she had sex. Edda encourages Amos to imagine random adults they're looking at naked. So that's totally cool also. And finally we spend about ten solid minutes trying to figure out what "I'll just serve you a colossal jong-jong" means. The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: Juliette teaches Edda about the necessity of being attractive and Edda expressing her complicated body dysmorphia ARE HERE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1681133741673172992?s=20). A Sunday strip all about a dumb fly and Amos uncomfortably and repeatedly sniffing Edda ARE HERE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1681133743338315779?s=20). Sophia Loren's "proud bosom," Juliette's inability to transform a man into a "gelatinous blob of slavering desire," and Amos showing his leg to some other boys ARE HERE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1681133745057980417?s=20). Juliette talks to Edda about finding and pushing her boyfriend's button, Edda and Amos imagining adult strangers naked, and the famous colossal jong-jong ARE HERE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1681133746786045953?s=20). This gelatinous, colossal episode includes: 4th of July Joey Chestnut Eating harmonicas Christmas Free Will Major League Eating "76 Trombones (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hdd6q0pW4DM)" from The Music Man Funnel Cakes Pizza Hut P'Zone Dutch ovens Twinkies International waters Barbie dolls Lauren Bacall Muppets Telly the Monster Dorothy Hamill Scent of a Woman and Al Pacino's catchphrase (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2dNeIAxll2A) Sophia Loren Slavering Imagining everyone naked Fast Times at Ridgemont High The Colossal Jong-Jong Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE)

We could not resist the gravitational pull of the international cello competition that Amos won. You remember it, right? He and Edda got caught on camera (by a news balloon of course) having sex and then people complained that the sex tape (which everyone in the world saw) gave Amos an unfair advantage. So now we dive into the aftermath. It's 20 strips this episode, sorry guys! It's a re-match between Amos and Xiulan Yuan, and the competition will happen behind a screen and the contestants will have to switch cellos. Because of course both of those things make sense. For no good reason at all, other than Brooke McEldowney's hatred of women maybe, Edda hates Xiulan and decides to be a racist right to her face. It's fine (and funny?) I guess because Xiulan doesn't speak English. The competition happens, behind the screen, in front of an audience who paid good money to look at a screen on a stage. Instead of feeling ripped off, the audience hears Amos's cello playing and starts fucking basically. Just like always. Even people listening on a streaming broadcast end up fucking. Amos wins, of course, although he appears bored to be there for the entirety of the run. To cap it off, two nuns scissor from the joy of it. Pretty fucking typical for this comic strip. The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: Headlines explain the outrage, Juliette phones Edda in Brussels, and Amos switches cellos ARE HERE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1665406916313645056?s=20). Seth wants Amos to "moitelize" Xiulan, Isabel Florin says an indecipherable four word phrase, and Edda quotes Rocky ARE HERE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1665406918796496897?s=20). Amos wishes Xiulan luck, Edda is a racist, and Juliette wishes Seth wasn't gay ARE HERE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1665406922185641984?s=20). Amos and Xiulan draw straws, Edda fogs up Amos's glasses, and we see a screen on a stage ARE HERE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1665406924790325248?s=20). Edda plays the one-key piano filled with milk, Edda and Amos are overcome with the passion of playing, and we see their weird sex arms, too many of which are left arms ARE HERE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1665406927155625986?s=20). Everyone listening starts fucking, second prize is awarded, and Edda flings her body toward a bored Amos ARE HERE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1665406930024558593?s=20). Amos changes into a blue suit for the on-stage celebration and two nuns do it ARE HERE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1665406933099003907?s=20). This episode, which was performed behind a screen, includes: Winnebago Man VHS Cut my gums off Silly Putty New Math "Love is in the Air" by John Paul Young (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NNC0kIzM1Fo) The World Wide Web Once Upon a One More Time (https://onemoretimemusical.com/) on Broadway Ripped from the headlines The Speed Cubers on Netflix (https://www.netflix.com/title/81092143) Turtlenecks Edda's tragic baldness Benjamin Franklin Enslaved by the exclamation point Macaroni microphone Jeff Beck Bugs Bunny The Bowery Boys Rocky Sea cucumbers The Bluey episode called "Pavlova" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6NqbB79mVyc) The Price is Right and Truth or Consequences Dutch angles Two left arms Full corn niblet mouth Scissoring nuns Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE)

Here we are introduced to 60-year-old Arthur Peel and his assistant Nan-Lin Peel (no relation), who is thirty years younger than him. Arthur excuses himself for being a disgusting old man, with a balding head, hair coming out of his ears and nose and eyebrows, wattles, and flapping flesh. These are his descriptions of himself, although Brooke Mac-El-Dee doesn't take the time to actually draw him that way. He is balding, but he has thin, very well groomed eyebrows, no visible wattles and few wrinkles to speak of. He repeats this stuff over and over to Nan-Lin, who seems bored and beaten down by his monologue. (You and us both, sister!) Of course, when Arthur adds that he is in love with her, this changes everything for Nan-Lin, who then literally crawls across a table to kiss him. Arthur, in typical Chickweed style, doesn't understand what's happening or that Nan-Lin wants his wrinkly and flapping Johnson. He looks terrified and concerned for all fourteen (yeah, sorry) of these strips. She even gets up on the table and presents her beave to him. Still, he doesn't fucking understand what's going on. Because...it's funny, I guess? Anyway, she eventually slides into his lap and then they disappear under the table. At this point, we discover that they are in a restaurant. The waiter arrives and is unfazed by their near-fucking in the booth. So much so, he takes their order, and then seats two other guests across from them. These guests, Seth and his boyfriend, don't notice that there's a couple moments away from intercourse across the booth from them. And they begin to make out too. At this point, both couples notice each other. Embarrassed (?) Arthur and Nan-Lin bolt from the restaurant, but not before Arthur gives the waiter a huge tip. The waiter then claims he's in love. Which must be a joke, but isn't funny really. And also makes no sense in any context provided. But what the fuck were we expecting anyway, right? The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: Arthur talks about his wattles and flapping flesh, Arthur talks about his wattles and flapping flesh AGAIN, and Arthur talks about his wattles but NOT his flapping flesh ARE HERE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1655737341502451712?s=20). Nan-Lin presents her beave, Nan-Lin ends up in Arthur's lap, and Arthur and Nan-Lin end up lying down in a booth in a restaurant ARE HERE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1655737343490535426?s=20). The waiter arrives to take their order, Nan-Lin and Arthur hear the waiter but just keep dry humping, and the waiter seats another couple opposite them ARE HERE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1655737345512202240?s=20). Seth and Mark immediately begin to make out, Seth and Mark notice Arthur and Nan-Lin, and the waiter insists on a big tip ARE HERE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1655737347315728385?s=20). The phrase "get a room" is uttered and the waiter falls in love with giant money ARE HERE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1655737349370974209?s=20). This key party-adjacent episode includes: What is the name of our favorite celebratory march? Cell phones in cars 2008 Mercury Mariner Hybrid Classic moment (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YT0CScFzp1o) from The Man With Two Brains. Lou Bega's Mambo No. 5 (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EK_LN3XEcnw). Brooke's Broadway musical Defibrillator Paper pants MRIs Metal underwear/chastity belts/codpieces Where "Bust a moo" originally came from (https://www.movieposters.com/products/home-on-the-range-mpw-8275). Adam Godley "Hot in Herre" by Nelly (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GeZZr_p6vB8) McEldowney ellipsis Ball wattles Gilbert & Sullivan Classical symphony orgasm (https://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/music/news/la-philharmonic-concert-loud-and-full-body-orgasm-b2330648.html) Pro-butt/Am-butt 21 Beave Salute Motorboating Laura Ingalls Wilder Turtlenecks Shrek Bluey's "cone of shame!" episode (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pkj66AEODE4) Throuples The Case of the Disappearing Mustache! Scooby Doo Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE)

In this episode, we dive into Amos's subconscious, which is predictably icky. Amos describes a dream he had the previous night. He headlines it as a dream where Edda went to buy a car. But what the dream is really about is how the car salesman sexually assaulted her. So, at least we know where Amos's priorities lie. The Ol' Mac-El-Dee makes a big point of repeating (endlessly) that the salesman's name was "Wilkins or Fortescue," as if that is, by it's nature a very funny piece of business, which it is not. Also, and not for nothing, the salesman looks a lot, A LOT, like Amos. So I guess that's maybe the point? It's a rape fantasy that Amos is having? It's all filled with car-related double entendres, because of course it is. Edda assumes, from Amos's description that her dream self simply gave herself to the car salesman, which shows where her priorities lie, I guess. Amos spends most of the dream choosing tea at Zabar's. As if that's a great place to choose tea. But then he rushes in to save her. I mean, not "rushes in," per se. He had to choose his fucking tea first. But he enters the dealership and pushes the salesman "onto his beezer." Whatever the fuck that means. In the end, Edda gets turned on by Amos and, while they're walking down the street, throws her vagina at his face. Seriously. Wait till you see the picture. It's fucking ridiculous. Also impossible. The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: Wilkins or Fortescue descends on Edda and Amos chooses his tea at Zabar's are right here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1647015657731661824?s=20). Amos pushes Wilkins or Forescue onto his beezer, Earl Grey keeps his secrets, and the Mac-El-Dee Walkin' C are right here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1647015659673649157?s=20). This nightmarish episode includes: Mullets Headphones Brooke's new comedy routine Improv Stuck in a closet Listener feedback "Tasty poopers" Urban slang Joe Biden Abe Vigoda Everything Everywhere All At Once Harry Potter hands 8-cylinder cars Andy Capp (https://www.gocomics.com/andycapp) Marathon Man "Is it safe?" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kzw1_2b-I7A) Zabar's Dean & Deluca In 'N' Out The Russian Tea Room Walking cunnilingus The Bachelor Lawn chairs & ironing boards Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE)

Edda's modeling career begins when a scout for the famous designer Nicolette Cignet picks Edda from everyone else in her dance company because of her nice butt. Only, Brooke Mac-El-Dee never says "nice butt," he prefers to say "caboose" over and over and over, with a brief digression to "sitzfleisch" from Amos. The twist is that they only want Edda for her butt and they want Janice to be the face. So, even though it makes zero sense, they'll use both of them: Janice's face and Edda's butt. There is no exploration of whose midriff and boobs will make the cut. Which, frankly, is a little surprising. Edda is angry to find out she's Janice's butt double. But showbiz is showbiz, right? The lone photographer sent to shoot this very important ad campaign takes his photos. They are terrible. Along the way, we are subjected to "undie-carriage," "golden hind," "sealing the deal," and "licking their chops." It's super gross. Edda ends up angry about butts, which takes us back around to one of the Thanksgiving strips we looked at, and helps us put in context why Edda was so mad about people saying "butt" all around her. The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: Edda finds out the Nicolette Cignet people want to talk to her, Seth throws shade at Edda for it, and Seth goes out of his way to use "terpsichorean" are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1639677943285956608?s=20). Amos says "sitzfleisch" for no good reason, Edda and Janice find out they're both there for the job, and Edda and Janice shit talk each other's butts are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1639677945110487040?s=20). Edda finds out she's Janice's butt double, Gil explains why the Nicolette Cignet logo can't be seen on a small butt, and Gil sprays Janice with oil and water are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1639677946893053952?s=20). Gil takes his questionable photos, Edda and Janice talk about ballet being hard, and the truly terrible photo campaign are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1639677948948287489?s=20). We're introduced to the phrase "undie-carriage" and Edda goes on her Thanksgiving Butt Walk are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1639677951422906368?s=20). This award-winning, then award-losing episode includes: Heart rates The will to live Urine drinking Willie Nelson The Huggle Neck muscles Steroids Autopsy impressions Rich Little is STILL doing impressions (https://www.cbsnews.com/news/rich-little-still-making-a-great-impression/)? Fred Travelina "The Way We Were" by Barbra Streisand (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ifWOSnoCS0M) "Welcome Back Kotter" theme song (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xZzEzDkeHzI). Dutch Angle The Terpsichorean Arts Sitzfleisch Cabooses Lobster claws Chaps vs. Shaps Van der Graaf Generator Butt Doubles Body Shaming Coco from Fame Kentucky Fried Chicken Sergio Valente Jeans Cross-Country Travel Transporting Ashes Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE)

After Edda "cures" Amos's hiccups, he takes the stage, first without his cello (hilarious!) and then with it. His performance, which is of course watched via satellite by all of his family and friends, inspires so much passion, that Juliette fucks Elliott on the couch right next to Nan. It also inspires Isabel to have sex with her boyfriend and Seth to make up with Mark, who appears here as a doll or small child. Amos finishes his performance and everyone there loses their minds, throwing their programs in the air and then roses at Amos and Edda. Naturally, the judges unanimously award the grand prize to Amos, who honestly looks like he doesn't give a shit and would rather be anywhere else but there. The victory is short-lived because of the sex tape that everyone saw. You know, because that caused an unfair advantage. Amos asks for another juried performance and then fucks Edda at the press conference. And that's where we leave Brussels, because this just goes on and on and we've truly had enough. (Part 3 of 3) The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: Two Belgian perverts listen to Amos & Edda have sex, Amos & Edda finish having sex, Amos forgets his cello, then Amos forgets he's at a competition are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1627658453236981760?s=20). Amos & Edda begin their performance, the audience falls in love, Juliette & Elliott have sex next to Gran, and Isabel accosts her boyfriend are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1627658456625991681?s=20). Seth reunites with Mark, the audience throws their programs, the audience throws roses, and Amos gives Edda a rose are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1627658459931119619?s=20). Brooke Mac-El-Dee makes an ellipsis joke, Edda floats up to heaven, Amos and Edda get a phone call, and Edda finally has to tell Amos about the sex tape are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1627658463382994944?s=20). Amos doesn't care about the sex tape and Amos & Edda have sex at a press conference are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1627658466302230528?s=20). This award-winning, then award-losing episode includes: Drug commercials Resting heart rates The Actor's Nightmare Broadway Stupid computers Lurking outside doors Claude the Cat Showgirls Yo-Yo Ma performs Bach's Cello Suite No. 1 in G Major (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1prweT95Mo0). "Great Balls of Fire" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F569_t2jCio) by Jerry Lee Lewis Poltergeist The clown scene is here (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BZOnLUt7OI4) and starts at 2:22. The vulva Sex in front of your mom Turtlenecks! Console TVs, much like this one (https://www.ebay.com/itm/174787590138?chn=ps&norover=1&mkevt=1&mkrid=711-117182-37290-0&mkcid=2&mkscid=101&itemid=174787590138&targetid=1262749491542&device=c&mktype=&googleloc=9031194&poi=&campaignid=14859008593&mkgroupid=130497710760&rlsatarget=pla-1262749491542&abcId=9300678&merchantid=6296724&gclid=Cj0KCQiAi8KfBhCuARIsADp-A55qOrLDnpRrQ2lb9akFKcqkCiQVzgDHs-4dkQ0WG44bXsm_nWKByFUaAtXSEALw_wcB). Raggedy Andy Doll Bats! Caligula Roses Melissa Manchester sings (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XGmYnKsuSh0) "Please Don't Let This Feeling End." Ellipses! E.T. More turtlenecks! Sweet Greens Souplantation Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE)

The world watched Amos and Edda have sex, thanks to a Belgian breaking news balloon, the kind of balloon that floats through the city of Brussels, filled with at least 10 reporters looking for news stories. And part of how they look for news, we guess, is to peep through windows of buildings and film people without their permission. Seems totally cool. But maybe that's just how "European" they are, and we're all a bunch of American yahoos. Whatever the case, the video (or film as Brooke Mac-El-D prefers to call it) becomes a sensation on the internet. But before that, Juliette, Seth, and some lady named Isabel all see the video/film of Amos and Edda fucking on a piano in a rehearsal space, thanks to the peeping reporters on the news balloon that somehow hovered outside their window for the entirety of their tryst. Edda sees the video/film on her laptop, but keeps Amos from viewing it or even knowing about it. So he is pretty confused when they're on the streets of Brussels and everyone they pass, literally everyone, is craning their necks to look at them. And by craning their necks we mean turning their heads literally completely around. The venue is packed, not "standing room only" as one would normally say, but "crammed to the exit signs." Sure. Amos gets nervous, gets the hiccups, and Edda gives him a look that says, "let's fuck," even though he is five minutes from taking the stage. And that's where we end this episode. (Part 2 of 3) The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: Juliette picks up the satellite broadcast from Brussels, tells Edda about it, and Edda is pleased Isabel has seen it are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1622303250262425600?s=20&t=oPfPgstnxF2LZLAsXti8lQ). Edda talks to Seth and then hides the video from Amos are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1622303253710139393?s=20&t=oPfPgstnxF2LZLAsXti8lQ). All of Brussels stares at Edda and Amos gets the hiccups again are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1622303256415453184?s=20&t=oPfPgstnxF2LZLAsXti8lQ). This episode that we picked up on a satellite broadcast from Brussels includes: The classic Yahtzee commercial (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9c9rCvNbvcM). Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory The Wild West Ethel Merman La La Land The Oscar mixup explained (https://www.bbc.com/news/entertainment-arts-39097183). We're twins! Wood Burning Kit (https://www.amazon.com/Adjustable-Temperature-Professional-Embossing-Soldering/dp/B07QWVHP5B) Easy-Bake Ovens and the dangers (https://www.retrothing.com/2007/07/hasbro-easy-bak.html) thereof. The Magic of Making Movies! Singin' in the Rain AMC's Nicole Kidman commercial Breaking News Balloon Turtlenecks! Remote controls The Bechdel Test Picking up satellite broadcasts Satellite Balloon / Balloon Satellite (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Balloon_satellite) And then this related thing (https://www.npr.org/2023/02/04/1154473950/u-s-cancels-blinkens-visit-to-china-after-the-appearance-of-a-spy-balloon) that happened the same day we recorded. Cirque du Soliel Woody Allen Let us never speak of Manhattan Long-distance and international calls Fabio killing a goose with his face (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5QUEtkXzwzQ). Mike Teevee's mom says Rachmoninoff (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5g4r-FbGivk). Harold & Maude Columbo falls down a hill (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ca037hZ36ZA) Broken necks Johnny Cash Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE)

Buckle up for another epic run of this guy's fucking garbage. We start looking at the story of Amos and Edda finally doing it in Brussels during a cello competition. It begins with Edda making a move on Amos which causes him to have the hiccups, which results in Amos wanting to go home. But Edda claims she has a cure, which is (of course) fucking. As soon as they've done the deed, Edda gets on the phone back home to tell her mom that, yes, she used the same "hiccup cure" that Juliette did when Juliette first humped Elliott. Because of COURSE the women had to be the instigators and the men had to be uncertain, terrified idiots about sex. Amos and Edda can't keep their hands off each other, which means that Amos pins Edda (very uncomfortably) against a piano. This embrace is viewed by a hot air balloon filled with tourists? Prisoners of war? News reporters? It is so very unclear who the people are and why they're in a hot air balloon floating through downtown Brussels. But why should anything ever make sense in this fucking strip? Why? (Part 1 of 3) The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: The ones where Edda comes on so strongly, Amos has hiccups, but she has a cure are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1619827633470185472?s=20&t=gtVxrdmvLSagRKhZC7Uh7g). The ones where Edda tells Juliette about fucking Amos, then Edda and Amos make out while rehearsing are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1619827637031145472?s=20&t=gtVxrdmvLSagRKhZC7Uh7g). The ones with the inexplicable spy balloon are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1619827640550191104?s=20&t=gtVxrdmvLSagRKhZC7Uh7g). This no longer virginal episode includes: Hangers Broadway Britney Spears Laundry vs. clothes Catholicism Madonna vs. whore Martin Scorsese High five / down low too slow The D.A. hairstyle (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ducktail) Lenny Briscoe Jerry Orbach, Broadway star (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8uGlL0xafP8) The definition of infatuation Hiccups Jascha Heifetz Tuba farts Amos's Patented Panty-Dropper Helium balloons in Burbank Balloon day in church Cleveland Balloonfest (https://www.theatlantic.com/video/index/562556/cleveland-balloonfest/) 1986 Liquid mercury Pirate ship ride Pro-Butt vs. Am-Butt All of the hiccup cures (https://www.healthline.com/health/how-to-get-rid-of-hiccups#treatment) Pausing the recording Turtlenecks Syrup bottles Star Trek: The Next Generation The End Pin International Cello Competition Chicken wire cages Hot air balloons The Montgolfier Brothers (https://www.museumofflight.org/Exhibits/montgolfier-brothers-balloon) The Hindenburg The Last of Us (https://www.museumofflight.org/Exhibits/montgolfier-brothers-balloon) News balloons Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE)

It's our first podcast of 2023! And we're so happy to discover that this strip still makes no goddamned sense at all. We begin our twelve-strip journey (yes! twelve!) with a customer service rep responding to texts from what turns out to be Thorax. Thorax is looking for overalls in XXXXL-Tall, so naturally his path to purchasing said clothing begins with texting a customer service person. And once he finds out it's a lady -- with the doubly unlikely name of Verity Dupee -- Thorax begins his harrassment. We're sorry, we totally mean romance. Romance as defined by Brooke McEldowney. Verity seems totally annoyed wiht Thorax. Who wouldn't be? But in the end she quits her job and travels to New Hampshire to hand deliver the overalls to Thorax, because she's in love with him. Right up until he tells her he's from another planet. The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: Thorax's romance/stalking of Verity Dupee begins right here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1617542019781636101?s=20&t=u4XUHZf4HgYJi0ppU09AEA). Verity DEFINITELY seems like she might call the cops on Thorax right here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1617542022717661185?s=20&t=u4XUHZf4HgYJi0ppU09AEA). For some reason, Verity is charmed by Thorax and visits him in New Hampshire right here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1617542025724977153?s=20&t=u4XUHZf4HgYJi0ppU09AEA). Verity is ready to get it on with Thorax but he ruins it by saying he's from another planet right here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1617542029164318720?s=20&t=u4XUHZf4HgYJi0ppU09AEA). This XXXL-tall episode includes: Deep sleep Smoked pepper cheddar cheese Corn chowder with poblano pepper soup Von's/Safeway and Ralph's/Kroger The old Soup Hole Dollar signs vs money signs Customer service The definition of verity. Raising Arizona Watt's Mill Theater in Kansas City Columbo Poise pads Van der Graaf generator XXXXL-Tall bib overalls Strawberries Paladins Thorax's home planet Murder, She Wrote Love letters The Fonz Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE)

It's our last podcast of 2022! So to celebrate the holidays, we focus on Christmas this episode. Despite striking out at Halloween and Thanksgiving, we give the holidays another shot and take a look to see if Brooke McEldowney has anything joyful or celebratory to say about Christmas. The answer is, of course, mostly no. We're exposed to a very weird "pickle leg," an inappropriately sexy ballet Santa, Edda's sexy knees, and there's even a fun Hitchcockian cameo from McEldowney himself. By "fun," we mean very, very confusing. Ultimately, Amos and Edda show us they have some serious Santa cosplay kink that they can't resist the gravitational pull of, even when their bedraggled-looking twins are nearby. Our exploration ends with McEldowney saying (through Edda) "God bless cartoonists." Because of course he does. It's just like the end of** A Christmas Carol**, only if Dickens was a pompous asshole. Which is our way of saying, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! We'll see you in 2023! The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: Edda dances, Seth becomes Sexy Santa, and Edda has sexy knees are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1605481247681130496?s=20&t=xjVJuAW-XH44q68CdnTprA). Seth's roommate hits on Edda and barfs and Brooke McEldowney makes an appearance are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1605481250038329344?s=20&t=xjVJuAW-XH44q68CdnTprA). Amos fucks pregnant Santa and Polly & Lolly hate Christmas are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1605481253066547200?s=20&t=xjVJuAW-XH44q68CdnTprA). And the world's most dismal White Christmas is here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1605481255218270208?s=20&t=xjVJuAW-XH44q68CdnTprA). This episode's jolly journey includes: Cottonelle toilet paper Pandemic preparation Peanut butter Can peanut butter go bad (https://www.nationalpeanutboard.org/wellness/how-long-will-that-peanut-butter-last.htm)? Whimsical hydration bottles Kelsey Grammer falling off a stage (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eu-BqOsvj00). The classic Grape Stomping Lady (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-RVyoAVgeyI) fall. The news tease jet pack fail (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qRVspuAJyAY). "Effing Under the Christmas Tree!" Sudden Onset Baby Leg Pickle leg "Buon Natale" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fDPjM5C0fCw) by Brave Combo. Conversion therapy Cindy Lou Who Cock rings Shame Underprivileged kids Uncle Fester fakes a neck injury on The Brady Bunch, but Mike outwits him (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=36wLG0VUPXg). Knee fetish Mistletoe Warner Brothers cartoons Daffy Duck in "Duck Amuck" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6QZDeDsadDs) Pregnant Santa Turtlenecks White Christmas Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE)

We flash back to World War II and immediately find ourselves dealing with two naked people in a...pond? ...a lake? ...a magical puddle? It's very unclear what kind of body of water. Anyway, the skinny-dippers are confronted with Nazis. We don't really know who we're dealing with at first. But the lady scares off some Nazis with her "terrifying downstairs business." We later discover that these mysterious people are Bill O'Malley, Juliette's stepfather, and Martine Clocqueur. Naturally, Martine is a beautiful double agent. We're just surprised she's not also a talented singer, dancer, or musician. Bill has a head wound which has resulted in amnesia. But when he and Martine make out, under the water of course, he remembers kissing someone else. That person is Edna, Juliette's mom, who is also a spy. Who isn't? Apparently Bill promised to get engaged with Edna after the war. Martine isn't so concerned about that because it's wartime and during wartime "everything we hold honorable has to be cured in salt and sliced very thin." Like that's a famous saying or something, which it isn't. What she means is that it's totally cool for them to have sex because it's war and, you know, only wartime rules apply. It's a little surprising that we don't see them doing it, all things considered, but she does press her "upsetting business" up against him a lot in that pond/lake/puddle. The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: The "back-up beave" is introduced, the Nazis cavort away, and Billy thinks about Martine's "downstairs business" are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1602053419799179264?s=20&t=GqcZfMdqjP4u8wlR1R6Uxg). Billy and Martine make out under the water, Billy remembers Edna (or has his penis eaten by fish), Martine recommends they have sex despite Edna are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1602053425335742464?s=20&t=GqcZfMdqjP4u8wlR1R6Uxg). Martine throws herself at Billy and then slices all honorable things paper thin are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1602053432189165569?s=20&t=GqcZfMdqjP4u8wlR1R6Uxg). This episode's terrifying & confusing journey includes: UCLA KU / MU Christmas Sausage Babe Talent Show Christmas cookies Professional voice work Liz Lemon (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zoXfQupV5n8) shoots her Dealbreaker intro on 30 Rock. World War II Nazis Amateur butt vs. pro butt The Back-Up Beaver Sexy Lady Godzilla Crystal Gayle / Emmylou Harris / Loretta Lynn The Nutcracker "What are cows?" The opening of the Ark of the Covenant (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0APF3SO9tqE) in Raiders of the Lost Ark. Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE)

If there was even a moment that you thought Brooke McEldowney wasn't a weirdo, we offer up this six-pack of excursions into the world of Edda's "toe cleavage." It starts off super-weird, with Edda sitting on the sidewalk so Amos can gawk at her feet. After thirty years of knowing each other, this toe cleavage thing comes as a surprise to Edda, because that totally makes as much sense as anything else in this strip. A cop threatens to take them in, and eventually someone files a court order against Amos to keep him from publicly lavishing affection on Edda's toes. It does NOT stop him from gawking at them in front of his children, however. So that's cool. Finally, when the kids are asleep, Amos asks permission, but somehow the thrill is gone for Edda. In other words, just a normal week in this godforsaken comic. The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: Amos gawks, then a cop shows up, then a cop admires Edda's toes too right here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1599453229892644865?s=20&t=WCsns7mc4wUrv5DOSySydw). Strangers witness Amos's fetish, his children witness his fetish, and Edda is no longer interested in his fetish are right here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1599453235529777153?s=20&t=WCsns7mc4wUrv5DOSySydw). This episode's fetishized journey includes: ER (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r3KCM7ldK08) Advent Calendars Nativity Scenes Studio Ghibli (https://ghiblicollection.com/) Amazon Pokemon Minecraft Roblox Texting Edema Turtlenecks! Sudden onset foot fetish Bradley Whitford "Queen of Hearts" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P0DK-0fIKCw) by Juice Newton The Glenn Close / Glenn Far meme (https://knowyourmeme.com/photos/267959-name-puns). George Michael Purity pledges The Good Place Shaq Hallmark Keepsake Ornaments (https://www.hallmark.com/ornaments/keepsake-ornaments/) Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE)

Neither of us was ready for Brooke McEldowney to introduce us to a filthy sock puppet named Sphinxter. But he did it anyway. Here, Sphinxter takes on internet trolls, or as McEldowney calls them, "anonymous onliners." If you're wondering if Sphinxter has a literal butthole for a mouth, he does. And we see it A LOT. In the end, McEldowney claims victory over the trolls and throws Sphinxter away. It's super fun! The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: Sphinxter gets introduced, states his thesis, and accosts Juliette & Elliott on the street right here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1596916594911113216?s=20&t=22cX8UtP1t_ydjYB08_pSw). Sphinxter uses a typewriter to address internet trolls, Juliette attacks Sphinxter, and then throws him away right here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1596916600514306048?s=20&t=22cX8UtP1t_ydjYB08_pSw). This episode's butthole-filled journey includes: Taking Brooke McEldowney to court Dolly the dog Class-Action Lawsuit Thorax Sock puppet Muppets Washing machines Oxy-Clean Dishwashing pods Sphinxter Popsicle sticks Lomi Mark Cuban Elon Musk Emeralds into diamonds Twitter "Onliners" Typewriters Cloaca Munchausen Syndrome Judy Garland Stockholm Syndrome So many turtlenecks! Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE)

To celebrate Thanksgiving, we check out a handful of strips that ran on Thanksgivings in the past. Naturally, Brooke McEldowney wants NOTHING to do with such a common holiday. So we have to find our own way to give thanks for Juliette burning her old Daisy Dukes, Rita Hayworth throwing hot dogs at virgins, Edda getting furious at a butt of Malmsey, Amos & Edda ogling a mystery woman together, and a character we've never seen before attempting to jump off a diving board while giving a piggy-back ride to another character we've never seen before. But the real thing to give thanks for might be our conversation about vampires and how the rules of vampires make Brooke (Dillman) absolutely furious. The Chickweed strips we discuss this episode: Juliette burns her Daisy Dukes, Rita Hayworth throws some hot dogs around, and Edda hears "butt" everywhere are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1594627712999559168?s=20&t=lGc2HR0TTMcJ3sl_Acq0wQ). Edda & Amos stare at some lady's bazongas and the nude diving board shenanigans are here (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE/status/1594627720956084225?s=20&t=lGc2HR0TTMcJ3sl_Acq0wQ). This episode's thankful journey includes: Jeff hates Thanksgiving Mashed potatoes Turkey butt Corn pudding Candied yams Green bean casserole Daisy Duke from Dukes of Hazzard The girl from The Ring (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hpb2-ZOzc_o) The Weber Grill World War II Entertainment Weekly Rita Hayworth Hot dogs Richard III Stuffing Ramen noodles Carol Burnett as Norma Desmond (https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x5fpga). Harvey Korman Bugs Bunny dressed up as a lady (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lpg-w2W1-GI). Period abuse Consonant blends Diving boards Billy Joel Let the Right One In Vampires Wizards Talk to Us! Having trouble understanding what's going on in a 9 Chickweed Lane strip you just read? Send it our way! We'll take a shot at interpreting it for you! Or maybe you just want someone to talk to? We're on Twitter: @9ChickweedRAGE (https://twitter.com/9chickweedRAGE)