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    6: Simon Sinek | What's Your "Why" and Where Do You Find It?

    en-usFebruary 19, 2018

    Podcast Summary

    • Creating a special experience for guests in your homeDesigning your home with personal touches and local recommendations can bring joy and additional income, while understanding the 'why' behind our actions and communicating it authentically attracts others.

      Creating a welcoming and special experience for guests in your home, whether you're hosting them as travelers through Airbnb or for personal reasons, can bring joy and additional income. Jen and the speaker on this episode have done this by designing their home with an extra bedroom, adding personal touches, and sharing local recommendations. This not only makes guests feel cherished but also allows the homeowners to share a piece of their world with others. Additionally, Simon Sinek emphasizes the importance of understanding the "why" behind what we do and communicating it authentically to attract others to our cause. This can be applied to both personal and professional life, as well as in creating a culture of trust.

    • Understanding the importance of purposeReflecting on what drives you and long-term goals brings calmness and perspective, while neglecting purpose can lead to short-term obsession and distraction.

      Having a clear sense of purpose or "why" is essential for individuals and organizations, regardless of their current circumstances. When times are good, it's easy to overlook the importance of purpose, but it becomes especially relevant during uncertain or challenging times. Companies and individuals often reevaluate their purpose when facing roadblocks or setbacks. Not having a sense of purpose can lead to an unhealthy obsession with daily metrics and short-term goals. On the other hand, having a strong sense of purpose can bring calmness and a long-term perspective. It's important to remember that growth and success are not always linear, and there will be ups and downs. To find or rediscover your purpose, start by reflecting on what drives you and what you want to achieve in the long run. Don't let the daily grind distract you from your ultimate destination.

    • Understanding the difference between why, purpose, and what we doYour why is the reason for your actions, not what you do or how you do it. It's essential to keep your why in mind to maintain motivation and make a positive impact.

      It's essential to understand that your why, your purpose, and your cause are not the same as what you do or how you deliver it. Your why is the reason you sacrifice and put effort into something, and it's the same reason your friends, family, and audience love and appreciate you. It's important not to confuse your passion for what you do with your why. Many people, especially creatives, may lose touch with their why when they can no longer do what they love to do in the same way. However, this doesn't mean you've lost your why; it just means you need to find new ways to bring it to life. Your why is an inherent part of who you are, and it's what drives you to make a positive impact on the world.

    • The joy and fulfillment often come from the journey towards a goal, not the goal itselfRecognizing the importance of the journey and sense of belonging for long-term happiness and fulfillment, rather than solely focusing on the next goal.

      Achieving a long-term goal, whether it's in sports, arts, or business, can lead to feelings of depression and loss of identity for individual achievers. This phenomenon is less common among team athletes or those with a strong sense of community and purpose. The initial sense of accomplishment from reaching a goal can wear off over time, leaving individuals in search of the next milestone. This constant pursuit of the next goal can lead to confusion and dissatisfaction, as the joy and fulfillment often come from the journey towards the goal rather than the goal itself. This is a common experience for high performers, and it's essential to recognize that the journey and the sense of belonging and purpose are crucial for long-term happiness and fulfillment.

    • Pressure to Succeed Leads to Sacrificing ValuesOrganizations should foster a culture that values both performance and ethical behavior, rather than just focusing on financial incentives.

      The pressure to succeed and be rewarded, often through financial means, can lead a significant number of individuals to prioritize their goals over their values and even their well-being. This was evident in a study of Olympic athletes, where over half reported they would sacrifice their lives to achieve their goals. However, it's important to note that this behavior is not exclusive to elite athletes or the Olympics. Many people in various industries and organizations may act similarly due to incentive structures that focus on short-term success and financial rewards, often leading to unethical or even illegal behavior. Instead, organizations should consider fostering a culture that values both performance and ethical behavior, offering opportunities for individuals to make a positive impact and grow, rather than just focusing on financial incentives.

    • The Dark Side of AmbitionUnchecked ambition can lead to chronic stress and related diseases. Strive for balance between personal goals and well-being, recognize signs of unhealthy ambition, and practice gratitude.

      Our relentless pursuit of success and ambition, if not checked, can lead to detrimental effects on our health and well-being. These extreme versions of human behavior, observed in elite athletes, are actually exaggerated versions of what many of us do unconsciously. We make a trade-off between our personal goals and our well-being, often leading to chronic stress and related diseases. It's crucial to recognize the signs of unhealthy ambition and strive for a balance between individual success and the well-being of the group. Being grateful for achievements, no matter how small, and understanding that there's no ultimate "winning" in life, can help keep our ambition in check.

    • The importance of allowing others to help and helping in returnEffective leadership requires trust, built on shared values and culture. Trust is a feeling, and good leaders prioritize the group's success and create a circle of safety.

      The best way to succeed in life and business is by allowing others to help us and being willing to help others in return. This concept is based on the understanding that life is an infinite game with no clear winner, and that companies and individuals come and go. The importance of trust, built on shared values and culture, is crucial for effective leadership and strong relationships. Trust is a feeling, and good leaders take care of those in their charge, regardless of rank. To become a successful leader, one must start with a clear understanding of their "why," but also prioritize the value of the group and the creation of a circle of safety. This approach fosters a sense of trust and collaboration, leading to greater success and fulfillment.

    • Building genuine connections through shared values and environmentsAuthenticity and shared values create a foundation for trust and meaningful connections in personal and professional settings. Leaders play a crucial role in fostering trust by creating a strong sense of purpose and values in their teams.

      Genuine connections are built on shared values and environments, whether it's in a personal or professional setting. Authenticity, or saying and doing what you believe, is essential in fostering trust and building camaraderie. The environment we create, whether it's at home or work, plays a significant role in shaping our relationships. Companies that have a strong sense of purpose and values create a tribe-like atmosphere where individuals can be themselves and trust each other. Leaders play a crucial role in building trust by taking the first step to bestow it upon their team members. It's important to remember that we don't have to be friends with everyone, but we should respect others' beliefs and find our tribe where we feel a sense of belonging. Authenticity and shared values create a foundation for trust and meaningful connections.

    • Building trust and authenticity in relationshipsTaking risks and putting effort build trust, deep connections require authenticity and trust, and our beliefs and actions shape relationships

      Building meaningful relationships, whether they be personal or professional, requires effort, trust, and authenticity. Just like in a healthy home environment, relationships are based on love and good leadership. We start by taking small risks and putting in effort to build trust. This dance of give and take leads to a deep sense of trust and acceptance where we can fully express ourselves without fear of judgment. As humans, we all desire this level of connection and trust in our relationships. We shape each other through our expectations and actions, either building trust or eroding it. Even in the early stages of a relationship, our beliefs and actions can attract like-minded individuals. However, it's important to remember that perks and recognition come with the position we hold, not as a reflection of who we are. Ultimately, we all deserve a "styrofoam cup," and it's up to us to maintain authenticity and trust in our relationships.

    • The Perks of Social Hierarchy: Respect, Gifts, and Higher PayUnderstanding and appreciating social hierarchy's perks is crucial for great leadership. Remember, help is necessary for success and practice social skills like asking for help and expressing emotions to build strong relationships.

      Understanding and appreciating the perks that come with different ranks or positions, rather than becoming entitled to them, is crucial for great leadership. Social hierarchy brings various perks, such as respect, doors being held open, gifts, and higher pay for seniors. However, it's essential not to let these perks define our identity. Instead, we should lean on the support of others during challenging times and remember that help is necessary for success in various aspects of life, including career and business. Moreover, practicing social skills, such as asking for help and expressing emotions, is vital in building strong relationships and overcoming adversity. Overall, embracing the importance of social skills and recognizing that they require education and practice is essential for personal and professional growth.

    • Leading by listening: Mandela's exampleEffective communication requires active listening and valuing others' perspectives to foster better relationships and productive discussions.

      Effective communication and listening are essential skills, especially in situations where people are excelling but neglecting relationships. It's important to ask questions and listen attentively instead of telling others what they should do. Mandela's example of leading by listening and being the last to speak illustrates this concept. By practicing active listening, leaders can create an environment where everyone feels heard and valued, leading to more productive discussions and better outcomes. Unfortunately, in today's society, there is a lack of listening and too much telling, leading to conflict and misunderstanding. To be an effective communicator and leader, it's crucial to prioritize listening and seek common ground. By doing so, we can foster better relationships, both personally and professionally.

    • Focus on being the last to speak for better connectionsEmpathy and understanding can lead to better connections and positive outcomes by shifting focus from ourselves to others

      Instead of focusing on being better listeners, we should practice being the last to speak. Our dogmatic opinions and the belief that we're 100% right and others are 100% wrong, especially in politics, can create division and blind us to the complexities of human values. The homeless lady sign experiment illustrates this concept well. People are more likely to give when they feel connected to the cause or person, rather than when it's all about the giver. By changing the focus from ourselves to others, we can be more effective in marketing, sales, and even in everyday interactions. The experiment also highlights the importance of ambition and the potential consequences of settling for less. Overall, practicing empathy and understanding can lead to better connections and positive outcomes.

    • Focus on the other personEmpathy and active listening build stronger relationships by understanding needs and desires, providing solutions only when asked, and acknowledging situations instead of rushing to offer solutions.

      Effective communication and connection in both personal and professional contexts lies in making it about the other person, rather than focusing on what we have to offer. This approach, rooted in empathy, involves understanding their needs and desires, and providing solutions only when asked for. It's essential to listen actively and acknowledge their situation instead of rushing to provide solutions. This principle, which can be applied to various aspects of life, from friendships to sales and marketing, can lead to stronger relationships and increased impact. It's crucial to remember that sometimes, people just want to be heard, and the simple act of listening can be more valuable than offering solutions.

    • Focus on early adopters who believe in your visionSuccess comes from working with early adopters driven by belief, not just guarantees or proof. Believers spread the word and provide essential support during challenging times.

      The key to spreading ideas and building a successful career is to focus on working with early adopters who believe in your vision, even if it's imperfect. Simon Sinek emphasizes that these individuals are driven by belief and not just guarantees or proof. He has been disciplined in his pursuit of early adopters and credits their support and advocacy for his success. Word-of-mouth recommendations from these believers have been more effective than any marketing campaign or media coverage. Sinek's career has been an experiment to prove the validity of the concept of the "why" and the law of diffusion of innovations. In tough times, it's essential to have the support of loved ones, as entrepreneurship is a challenging journey best navigated with the belief and encouragement of others.

    • Finding the right partners and clients for long-term successBuilding a successful business requires a team effort, finding early adopters who believe in the vision, and being cautious during client courting to avoid negative behaviors.

      Building a successful business requires partnership and support from dedicated team members and clients. The speaker shared a personal story of an employee's sacrifice and loyalty, which led to a long-lasting friendship and business success. This experience emphasizes the importance of finding early adopters who are willing to help and believe in the vision, rather than focusing on short-term gains with difficult clients. The speaker also advised being cautious during the client courting process and avoiding clients who display negative behaviors, as they are likely to continue these behaviors in the long-term relationship. Overall, the key takeaway is that building a successful business requires a team effort, and finding the right partners and clients is crucial for long-term success.

    • Understanding Millennials: Shaped by Unique ExperiencesMillennials' experiences growing up with social media and cell phones have shaped their perspectives and behaviors, leading to generational trends. Empathy and collaboration can help bridge the gap between generations.

      Our experiences and the historical context in which we grow up shape our perspectives and behaviors, forming generational trends. The speaker's viral Facebook video, which discussed the millennial generation, garnered massive attention due to the widespread belief that millennials were unleadable. This perception, according to the speaker, stems from the unique experiences of growing up during the millennium with social media and cell phones becoming ubiquitous. By understanding where this generation comes from, we can foster empathy and help bridge the gap between generations. The video received an overwhelmingly positive response, with both millennials and older generations expressing appreciation for the insight. Although the speaker's collaboration with Tom Bilyeu on Inside Quest led to significant exposure for the show, the name change after their collaboration may have affected the direct traffic it received. Nonetheless, the cooperative nature of the speaker's work and the positive impact on Inside Quest's brand recognition demonstrate the power of collaboration and the interconnectedness of our professional endeavors.

    • Discovering your personal 'why'Find Your Why is a practical guide to help individuals identify and apply their personal 'why' for greater fulfillment and success.

      Simon Sinek, the author of "Start With Why" and the new workbook "Find Your Why," emphasizes the importance of understanding the "why" behind actions and ideas. However, some critics argue that while the concept is compelling, the previous book didn't provide enough guidance on how to implement it. In response, Sinek wrote "Find Your Why" as a practical guide to help individuals discover their personal "why" and apply it to their lives. The book is best experienced in its paper format as a workbook, allowing readers to engage with the exercises and concepts more effectively. Overall, Sinek's message continues to resonate, inspiring people to dig deeper and find their purpose.

    • Emphasizing the importance of continuous learning and growthApply the lessons from the show to your own life and practice continuous learning and growth

      The hosts of the show encourage listeners to share the podcast with others, whether they are loved ones or not. They are continually working on producing more content and are excited to bring it to their audience. A key message is for listeners to not just passively consume the information, but to actively apply it to their own lives. The hosts will be back with more insights next time. Overall, the show emphasizes the importance of continuous learning and growth, and encourages listeners to engage with the material in a meaningful way. So, take the lessons from the show and put them into practice, and join the hosts again for more valuable insights.

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    • Have any questions, comments, or stories you'd like to share with us? Drop us a line at friday@jordanharbinger.com!
    • Connect with Jordan on Twitter at @JordanHarbinger and Instagram at @jordanharbinger.
    • Connect with Gabriel on Twitter at @GabeMizrahi and Instagram @gabrielmizrahi.

    Full show notes and resources can be found here: jordanharbinger.com/985

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    • There are an estimated three million shipwrecks on the ocean floor, preserving valuable historical artifacts and information — such as the Antikythera mechanism, an ancient Greek analog computer.
    • Exploring the ocean can lead to groundbreaking discoveries in medicine, Earth's history, and climate, providing valuable insights for addressing humanity's challenges — provided we safeguard this treasury of knowledge for current and future generations.
    • And much more...

    Full show notes and resources can be found here: jordanharbinger.com/984

    This Episode Is Brought To You By Our Fine Sponsors: jordanharbinger.com/deals

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