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    (Matt Monday): Want More Than A Situationship? DO NOT CHASE; Do THIS Instead

    enApril 30, 2024

    Podcast Summary

    • Being intentional in relationshipsConsider consequences, align actions with goals, communicate intentions, avoid past patterns, find fulfilling relationships

      Being intentional in relationships means considering the consequences of our actions on both ourselves and others. The Love Bomber, who indulges in feelings without regard for the other person, is not being intentional. Instead, we should ask ourselves if our actions align with our goals and communicate our intentions clearly. The question of when to sleep with someone is not about gender or timeline, but about whether it serves our desired path in a relationship. By being intentional, we can avoid repeating past patterns and increase the likelihood of finding a fulfilling relationship.

    • Distinguishing feelings from actionsBeing mindful of our intentions and ensuring actions align for healthy, authentic relationships. Avoid love bombing to disguise minimum intentions.

      Our feelings and actions should align with our intentions. A man at a coffee shop shared his experience of wanting to express deep feelings for someone but choosing to take things slowly to avoid disrupting their relationship. This distinction between what we feel and what serves our intentions is crucial. Love bombing, or showering someone with excessive praise and grandiosity, can disguise minimum intentions. It's essential to be aware of the difference and ensure our actions match our genuine intentions for healthy and authentic relationships.

    • Consider intentions and compatibility in relationshipsAssess mutual interest and alignment in life goals to build stronger, healthier relationships, rather than acting on impulse or being swept away by intense feelings.

      While it's natural to feel strong attractions and desires in relationships, it's important to consider the intentions and compatibility behind those feelings before acting on them. The concept of "love bombing," where someone showers affection without regard for the other person's feelings or intentions, can lead to hurt and misunderstandings. Similarly, jumping into bed after a few dates without considering compatibility can also cause issues. Instead, it's crucial to assess whether there's mutual interest and alignment in what both parties want in their lives. By focusing on compatibility and intentions, we can build stronger, healthier relationships.

    • Focus on getting to know each other before intimacyPrioritize deep connection and compatibility over physical attraction in the early stages of dating to increase chances of a successful relationship.

      While being attracted to someone is important, it's not the only factor in determining compatibility and a potential long-term relationship. Instead of rushing into physical intimacy, it's crucial to focus on getting to know each other on a deeper level and assessing compatibility. This shows intentionality and increases the chances of the other person taking you seriously. The speaker emphasizes that this is not about being prudish or religious, but rather about prioritizing an honest assessment of the relationship over the euphoric highs of early dating. Sex should not be seen as a special category, but rather as a potential complication that can cloud judgment and distract from the importance of getting to know someone truly.

    • Assessing compatibility in datingFocus on getting to know potential partners, understand their values, and determine mutual interest for a strong foundation in dating.

      When it comes to dating and building a relationship, it's essential to prioritize assessing compatibility over acting on feelings. While it's natural to feel strongly attracted to someone and want to pursue a relationship immediately, taking the time to evaluate whether the person is a viable partner for your long-term goals is crucial. This means focusing on getting to know them better, understanding their values, and determining whether there is mutual interest and potential for growth. As the speaker emphasized, the early stages of dating can be filled with excitement and emotions, but it's essential to keep a clear head and approach the situation with a growth mindset. By focusing on building a strong foundation, you increase your chances of finding a meaningful and committed relationship. Additionally, the speaker offered a free training called "Dating with Results," which can help individuals avoid common mistakes and navigate the dating scene more effectively. By taking advantage of this resource and staying committed to the process, you can increase your chances of finding the right person and building a lasting connection.

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