The difference between easy and difficult beauty (w/ Chloe Cooper Jones)

Podcast Summary

• Defying Societal Boxes: Individuals have the power to define themselves beyond societal labels and broaden their experiences through art, beauty, and an internal life.

  Society often tries to categorize people based on their appearance or other identifying factors, but individuals have the power to define themselves beyond these narrow boxes. This was highlighted in the story of the speaker's experience during commercial auditions, where he felt out of place and boxed in based on his appearance. Similarly, Chloe Cooper Jones, the author of "Easy Beauty," shares her experiences of being othered due to her visible disability, but also the ways in which art, beauty, and an internal life have helped her broaden her experience and self-define. Ultimately, it's important to remember that we are all more than the labels society might put us into and have the capacity to define ourselves in meaningful ways.

• Navigating life's uncertainties with honesty and complexity: Being true to oneself, with all its complexities and imperfections, is crucial for navigating life's uncertainties and challenging limiting stereotypes.

  Uncertainty is a common theme among young adults when making big life decisions. Meanwhile, in a different context, Chloe Cooper Jones's book "Easy Beauty" emphasizes the importance of honesty and complexity in understanding self-identity, particularly in relation to disability. Jones shares her own experiences of feeling misunderstood and misrepresented based on her exterior, and the need to be honest about her fears, failures, and agency in order to challenge limiting narratives about disability. As a person who identifies as disabled, Jones notes that disability is a broad term, affecting about 1 in 5 Americans, and that it's a temporary or permanent condition that many people will experience at some point in their lives. The takeaway is that being true to oneself, with all its complexities and imperfections, is crucial for navigating life's uncertainties and challenging limiting stereotypes.

• Challenging assumptions and seeking deeper understanding: Engaging with beauty in the world can help us expand our perspective and challenge assumptions, leading to greater compassion and empathy.

  Disability, as a part of the human condition, is often misunderstood and misrepresented, leading to negative stereotypes and othering. People are constantly judging and categorizing us based on our physical appearance, and this can limit our experiences and perspectives. Iris Murdoch's belief that engaging with beauty in the world can help us expand our perspective and see beyond our limited beliefs is a powerful reminder to challenge our assumptions and seek deeper understanding. By opening our eyes to the complexity of the world and the people in it, we can begin to break free from the narrow confines of our own perspectives and grow into more compassionate, empathetic individuals.

• Focusing on beauty can help us grow and understand others: Identify what brings awe or release from self, immerse in it to expand perspective, and find joy in the aesthetic experience.

  Art and beauty can serve as powerful tools for personal growth and understanding of others. Iris Murdoch's example of observing a kestrel bird in moments of stress or introspection demonstrates how focusing on the beauty of the world around us can provide a reprieve from our own interiority and ego. To incorporate this practice into one's life, it's essential to identify what brings about a sense of awe or release from self. For some, it may be reading, music, or engaging in deep conversations. For others, it could be activities like swimming, cooking, or simply observing nature. By actively seeking out these moments and immersing oneself in them, we can experience a break from our relentless ego and expand our perspective. Personally, I find that getting into water or cooking can help me achieve this feeling of being present in the moment and fully engaged in the sensory experience. The aesthetic experience, derived from the Greek meaning of the senses, encourages us to connect with the world beyond ourselves and find joy in the simple pleasures it offers.

• Appreciating everyday beauty: Expanding our perspective and valuing aesthetic experiences in everyday life can broaden our horizons and potentially bring about change. Embrace unique identities and find beauty in unexpected places.

  Aesthetic beauty, or the beauty that comes to our senses, is a vast and valuable experience that extends beyond physical appearance or elite art forms. Iris Murdoch and Chloe Cooper Jones encourage us to appreciate these moments in our everyday lives, from swimming in the ocean to sharing a meal with others. By expanding our perspective and valuing these experiences, we can broaden our horizons and potentially bring about change. Cooper Jones also highlights the importance of recognizing and embracing our unique identities, including those with disabilities. In her travels, she shares an encounter in a museum that showcases the power of attraction and newness. This moment serves as a reminder that there is beauty in the world that can inspire and connect us, regardless of our circumstances.

• Two Types of Beauty: Easy and Difficult: Difficult beauty requires patience and effort to fully appreciate, while easy beauty is instantly pleasing. Both types enrich our lives and offer unique experiences.

  There are two types of beauty: easy and difficult. Easy beauty is instantaneously pleasing to the senses, such as a beautiful sunset or a delicious meal. Difficult beauty, on the other hand, requires patience and effort to fully appreciate. It can be found in complex art, profound experiences, or vast natural wonders that make us feel small and insignificant. According to philosopher Bernard Bosanquet, difficult beauty also requires "width," which means being able to sit with the experience and feel its full impact. Motherhood and other challenging experiences can provide this sense of width and remind us of our small place in the larger human story. It's important to remember that not all experiences of beauty will be enjoyable all the time, and it's okay to create space for ourselves when needed. Love, too, can be difficult and painful at times, and it's essential to acknowledge and accept these aspects of it. Ultimately, beauty is a complex and multifaceted concept that requires both pleasure and patience to fully understand and appreciate.

• Embrace the Complexity of Human Emotions: Remember that everyone experiences pain and struggle, and being authentic about our emotions can help us feel less alone. Embrace the interconnectedness of human experiences through vulnerability and kindness.

  Love and the human experience are vast and complex, encompassing a range of emotions including disappointment, frustration, anger, and pain. It's natural to want to avoid these feelings, but they can actually be tools for connection and growth. Instead of adding shame or judgment to our pain, we can remember that everyone experiences difficulty and struggle, and being authentic about our emotions can help us feel less alone. A memorable example of this was shared in the story of being in Italy and encountering a man exposing himself, who then unexpectedly showed kindness and blessings. These moments of absurdity can serve as reminders of the complexity and interconnectedness of human experiences.

• Embracing the complexities of life's moments: Acknowledge and hold the contradictions of life's moments for their 'difficult beauty' instead of trying to simplify them. Use life's complexities to your advantage.

  Life's complex moments, no matter how small they may seem, can hold a mix of emotions, including pain, suffering, humor, and absurdity. These contradictions can coexist, creating what the speaker calls "difficult beauty." The speaker also emphasizes the importance of acknowledging and holding all these tensions, rather than trying to simplify them. Additionally, the speaker shares a humorous anecdote about running a scam involving Girl Scout Cookies, which she used to her advantage due to others' lowered expectations of her. This experience ties back to the theme of embracing the complexities of life and using them to one's advantage.

• Navigating Complexities: Balancing Protection and Challenging Stereotypes: As children, we may take advantage of harmful stereotypes to achieve our goals, but as adults, it's important to recognize the need to correct them while also protecting ourselves.

  Chloe Cooper Jones' experience of selling Girl Scout cookies as a child shows the complexities of navigating the instinct to protect oneself while also challenging harmful stereotypes and prejudices. Jones started selling cookies as a way to capitalize on a market that others weren't reaching, but she also took advantage of the infantilizing attitudes towards children, which allowed her to continue the scheme without getting caught. However, when her mother discovered what she had done, she was forced to return the money and was kicked out of the Girl Scouts. Jones reflects on this experience as an adult and recognizes the importance of balancing the protective instinct with the need to correct harmful beliefs and stereotypes. This is a lesson she continues to grapple with in her life. Jones' story also highlights the absurdity and humor that can be found in reality, even during challenging situations. Overall, Jones' experiences and insights offer valuable lessons on navigating complex situations and finding joy and beauty in unexpected places.

• Exploring Running Shoes and Business Solutions: Listen to 'How to Be a Better Human' podcast for insights on improving running experience with Brooks Ghost Sixteens and managing businesses efficiently with Odoo

  The podcast "How to Be a Better Human" features Morgan Flannery, Rosalind Tortoise Ilias, and Jocelyn Gonzalez, and is supported by Brooks Running and Odoo. Morgan shares her excitement about using the lightweight and cushioned Ghost Sixteens from Brooks for running, which is now available to listeners. Odoo is introduced as an affordable, all-in-one management software solution for businesses, helping users save time and money with fully integrated applications. Listeners are encouraged to check out brooksrunning.com and odoo.com/betterhuman for more information. By supporting the show, listeners can enhance their running experience and improve their business management.