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    The Man Who Drank A Litre Of Vodka Everyday: "How I Stopped Drinking" - Sober Dave | Ep.21

    enAugust 07, 2023
    How can LinkedIn benefit small business owners seeking employees?
    What products does Quinn offer at lower prices?
    Who is Sober Dave and what is his story?
    How can alcohol act as a coping mechanism for ADHD?
    What challenges do those with ADHD face in reading?

    • Exploring LinkedIn for Small Business Hiring and Affordable EssentialsLinkedIn is a valuable platform for small businesses to find top talent, while Quinn offers affordable essentials with a focus on ethical manufacturing. Bombas provides essentials for consumers and those in need, and Sober Dave's story highlights the possibility of change despite past struggles.

      LinkedIn is an essential tool for small business owners looking to hire professionals. It's where you can find top talent that might not be actively searching for a new job but could be open to the right opportunity. In fact, over 70% of LinkedIn users don't visit other leading job sites. So, if you're in the market for new hires, start your search on LinkedIn. Meanwhile, if you're looking to upgrade your wardrobe without breaking the bank, consider checking out Quinn. They offer high-quality shirts, polos, activewear, and fine leather goods at significantly lower prices than other luxury brands, all while prioritizing safe, ethical, and responsible manufacturing. In the world of essentials, Bombas continues to make a difference by providing super soft socks, underwear, and t-shirts for both consumers and those facing homelessness. Their recent innovation - absurdly comfortable essentials. Lastly, for those with a history of problematic drinking, the story of Sober Dave, a man who celebrated his four and a half year sobriety after decades of drinking a bottle of vodka every night, serves as a reminder that no matter what our past looks like, change is always possible. Growing up, Sober Dave didn't have a drinking problem in his household, but he felt isolated and bullied in school, which may have contributed to his later struggles. But through his podcast and book, 1 for the Road, he's become a voice in the sober community and an inspiration for those seeking recovery.

    • Alcohol as a coping mechanism for emotional pain and rejectionMany people have turned to substances like alcohol to cope with emotional pain and feelings of rejection

      For the speaker, alcohol served as a coping mechanism during a difficult time in his life when his mother left and his father moved on. Feeling isolated, insecure, and rejected, he found acceptance and confidence among a group of older kids who introduced him to drinking at a young age. The alcohol numbed his emotions and helped him deal with the pain and rejection he felt. Growing up in a financially struggling family with little affection, the speaker was sensitive and needy, making him even more vulnerable to the allure of alcohol as a way to fill the void and fit in. The speaker's story is unique but relatable, as many people have turned to substances to cope with emotional pain and feelings of rejection.

    • Alcohol as a coping mechanism for rejection and feelings of not belongingAlcohol can lead to emotional growth stunting by providing a false sense of acceptance and belonging, creating a cycle of rejection and reliance.

      Alcohol can act as a coping mechanism for rejection and feelings of not belonging, leading to a reliance and eventual stunting of emotional growth. The speaker's experiences of rejection from his mother and later his father's partner, as well as societal pressures, led him to find acceptance in a group of lads who introduced him to alcohol. The alcohol provided a sense of belonging and acceptance, but also led to a rapid transition into adulthood and a reliance on it as a coping mechanism. The speaker's emotional growth was stunted for decades as a result, and he describes alcohol as being "crafty and devious," luring him in with false promises of acceptance and happiness. The cycle of rejection and reliance on alcohol continued throughout his life, and he describes the struggle to break free from it as being met with the alluring voice of the alcohol, urging him to return.

    • The dangers of drinking aloneDrinking alone can lead to isolation, excessive consumption, failed relationships, low self-esteem, and a general sense of unhappiness. Recognize the potential dangers and address the underlying issues.

      The transition from social drinking to drinking alone at home can lead to a dangerous cycle of isolation and excessive consumption. This individual's story illustrates how alcohol's accumulative effect can lead to failed relationships, low self-esteem, and a general sense of unhappiness. He started drinking to escape feelings of rejection and failure, but the isolation and lack of accountability led to a downward spiral of increased consumption and weight gain. He eventually reached a point where he was drinking a liter of vodka a night and barely remembered his forties due to his drunken stupor. It's important to recognize that everyone's experience with alcohol is unique, but this story highlights the potential dangers of drinking alone and the importance of addressing the underlying issues that may be driving the desire to escape through alcohol.

    • Complex relationships with alcohol: Emotional and physical driversIndividuals shared experiences of using alcohol as a coping mechanism for emotional and physical needs, acknowledging the challenges of breaking the cycle

      Both individuals shared experiences of complex relationships with alcohol, with each recognizing the emotional and physical aspects that fueled their consumption. The speaker described a pattern of excessive drinking that led to a constant state of intoxication, almost masking the negative consequences. They admitted to using alcohol as a form of self-defense and justification, even when it negatively impacted their professional and personal life. The other individual identified the emotional state as their primary driver for drinking, describing a love-hate relationship with alcohol. They also acknowledged the role of the physical craving in perpetuating their drinking habits. Both individuals acknowledged the challenging aspect of stopping the cycle, with the speaker describing the emotional overthinking that alcohol helped quiet and the other individual recognizing the urge to stop the shakes. Overall, their conversations highlighted the intricacy and complexity of alcohol addiction, touching on the emotional, physical, and social aspects that contribute to the ongoing struggle.

    • Personal stories of hitting rock bottom in addictionRecovery from addiction is a complex, personal journey. Hitting rock bottom doesn't guarantee sobriety, but seeking help is a courageous step.

      Hitting rock bottom doesn't always mean the end of addiction for everyone. The speaker shared a personal story of multiple rock bottom moments, including a particularly harrowing experience in Eastbourne, where he stayed drunk for four days on the beach. Despite these experiences, he continued to drink until he was ready to seek help. This story underscores the complexity of addiction and the importance of understanding that recovery is a personal journey. It's not always a straightforward progression from hitting rock bottom to getting sober. The speaker's vulnerability in sharing his story serves as a reminder that addiction can be brutal and that seeking help is a courageous step. It also highlights the importance of recognizing that everyone's journey is unique and that there is no one-size-fits-all approach to recovery.

    • Revisiting past experiences and memoriesStaying connected to past challenges and memories can inspire personal growth and help others. Setting personal goals based on positive outcomes can motivate self-improvement.

      Staying connected to past experiences and memories, especially those related to overcoming challenges like addiction, is crucial for personal growth and helping others. The speaker shared how revisiting old places and recalling memories keeps him grounded and emotionally relatable to others. His decision to quit drinking was influenced by a friend's suggestion to take a break for three months, which helped him visualize a happier, fitter, and more productive version of himself. By focusing on the positive outcomes, he was able to overcome the internal struggle and commit to his sobriety. The power of staying connected to past experiences and setting personal goals can serve as a powerful motivator for self-improvement.

    • Encountering a turning pointMeeting someone can inspire life-changing decisions, even after decades. Self-talk and determination help prepare for the change, and finding a personalized recovery approach is essential.

      Sometimes, a single encounter or experience can be a turning point in one's life, leading to significant and lasting change. The speaker shares how meeting someone who reminded him of a character from a movie triggered an immediate and spontaneous decision to end a long-term narcissistic relationship and quit drinking alcohol after 40 years. While the decision wasn't easy, the speaker's self-talk and determination played a crucial role in preparing him for this moment. The speaker also emphasizes the importance of finding a recovery approach that resonates with one's personal beliefs and values, as he found that the repetitive nature of some programs didn't work for him. Ultimately, the speaker's story highlights the power of taking action and making a commitment to personal growth, even when it seems daunting or uncertain.

    • Finding Support in Communities for Alcohol RecoveryA man started a podcast and community for 'gray area drinkers', proving essential support beyond traditional groups for those seeking sobriety.

      Finding a supportive community can be a game-changer for those struggling with alcohol and overcoming the shame and stigma associated with it. This was exemplified by a man named [Name], who after attending a sober event, felt accepted and inspired to start his own community through a podcast. He realized there was a need for a space beyond traditional support groups like AA and discovered a large population of individuals identifying with "gray area drinking." Through his podcast and community, he was able to help thousands connect and find support, proving that communities are essential for those on the journey to sobriety.

    • Navigating the Challenges of Giving Up AlcoholMaintaining sobriety requires mental strength, support, education, and finding what works best for you. Fear of social situations, romanticization of drinking, and the myth of moderation can make it challenging. Considering the impact on loved ones can be a powerful motivator.

      Giving up alcohol can bring up various challenges, both personally and in relationships. For some, the fear of social situations or the romanticization of drinking can make it difficult to maintain sobriety. The myth of moderation also plays a role, as most people who struggle with alcohol cannot go back to drinking in a controlled way. To overcome these challenges, it's essential to rely on mental strength, support, education, and finding what works best for you. Additionally, considering the impact of drinking on loved ones can be a powerful motivator to quit.

    • Personal experiences with alcoholism's impactAccept past, focus on self-improvement, invest in personal growth for better mental, physical health, and happiness.

      Personal experiences, such as losing a loved one to alcoholism, can serve as powerful catalysts for self-improvement. Lucy's story of losing her husband to liver failure and the impact it had on her and her children underscores the catastrophic effects excessive drinking can have on individuals and their families. It's essential to accept the past and focus on being the best version of oneself moving forward. This may involve making amends, letting go, or simply being truthful, kind, and present in one's life. The speaker's own journey to sobriety led to significant improvements in her mental and physical health, as well as a newfound sense of inner contentment and happiness. The constant marketing and normalization of alcohol can make this journey challenging, but it's essential to remember that one's worth and happiness come from within. Investing in personal growth, such as therapy, can help individuals unpack and address past feelings, allowing them to move forward and live their best lives.

    • Freedom from alcohol addiction: Regaining independenceBreaking free from alcohol addiction can lead to renewed contentment, control, and independence. Labels like 'alcoholic' don't define those in recovery, who focus on moving forward.

      Breaking free from alcohol addiction can lead to a renewed sense of contentment and control over one's life. This person described the feeling of being shackled by alcohol as a toxic relationship, and when they finally broke free, they felt like they had regained their independence and were no longer a prisoner to the bottle. They also mentioned that the label "alcoholic" doesn't resonate with them as they are constantly moving forward and don't want to be defined by their past. Additionally, they mentioned that they believe having low dopamine levels, possibly due to ADHD, may contribute to impulsive behaviors such as binge drinking. Overall, the takeaway is that freedom from addiction can lead to a more fulfilling and expansive view of life.

    • Alcohol as a coping mechanism for ADHDPeople with ADHD may use alcohol as a temporary relief for their symptoms, but it can lead to a vicious cycle and should be replaced with healthier coping mechanisms.

      Alcohol can act as a coping mechanism for individuals with ADHD, quieting their overactive minds and reducing impulsivity. However, this relief is temporary and can lead to a vicious cycle of wanting more. The void left by alcohol needs to be filled with other activities or hobbies to maintain focus and concentration. The trend of problematic drinking among people with ADHD is becoming more apparent, and there seems to be a link between the two due to the impulsivity and need for mind-quieting substances. Additionally, individuals with ADHD often struggle with reading due to a lack of focus and concentration, making audio content a more effective consumption method. The modern age's constant distractions and shortened attention spans further complicate the issue, making it essential for individuals to find alternative methods to engage with written content. Overall, understanding the connection between ADHD and alcohol consumption can lead to valuable insights and potential solutions for managing symptoms.

    • Impact of Alcohol on Mental Health and RelationshipsAlcohol can negatively impact mental health and relationships, regardless of quantity. Reflect on personal drinking habits and consider seeking support if needed.

      Alcohol consumption can significantly impact mental health and relationships, even if it's not to the extreme of addiction. Sober Dave, a guest on the podcast, shared his personal experience of struggling with anxiety and depression due to his drinking habits, encouraging listeners to reflect on their own relationship with alcohol and how it makes them feel. He emphasized that it's not about the quantity but the impact on mental health and relationships. For those interested in exploring this further, Sober Dave's Instagram page, @soberdave, is a resource for help and support. The conversation also touched on various occasions, such as Mother's Day, where expressing love and care can make a difference. United Healthcare's Health ProtectorGuard fixed indemnity insurance plans and Whole Foods Market were highlighted as resources for managing healthcare costs and celebrating special occasions, respectively.

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    5. We talked about the natural evolution that a person goes through during treatment and how this process takes time. It’s a very personal and individual process that is different for everyone.  So at some point, standardization is not in the best interest of the people this system is trying to help.  Everyone’s pace may be a bit different.  But to accelerate that beyond someone’s ability to gain insight is rushing the process.

      What drove this duration change?
      Some of this is because of the cost of treatment – we reduced length to reduce cost.  We are automating, and standardizing treatment when it is a very individual thing.  Therapy is by design, a very inefficient process so it is not going to be possible to standardize it for everyone.


    6. We talked about the Art versus the Science of recovery and treatment. We got into the balance between the two concepts and how getting that balance right leads to a highly individualized level of care which the modern-day system is leaning away from.


    7. Where is the greatest opportunity for entrepreneurs in the mental health startup landscape?  We talked at length about this. Martin was clear that his top priority is around testing and measurement. He explains that we need to find solutions that standardize the assessment, diagnosis, and validation of diagnosis in the early days of treatment.  Often times, due to a lack of accurate testing, we misdiagnose and then establish a treatment plan that does not work leading to years of bad experiences and an unhealthy human.


    8. We spent time talking about senior mental health care and how seniors are disproportionately being driven into self-isolation and loneliness during this time of COVID. There are consequences to that isolation and withdrawal.  Ove the next 6-12 months we will likely see an escalation of mental health issues in seniors as a result and we talked about what we can be doing about it since we know we can predict it.



    Connect with the Stigma Podcast in the following ways: Patreon Page,  Website, Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn, Email

    Connect with host Stephen Hays here: Stephen Hays Personal Website, Twitter, LinkedIn, What If Ventures (Mental Health Venture Fund)

     

     

    Episode 28 - Jackie Bertolette

    Episode 28 - Jackie Bertolette
    In this episode on Color Me In Podcast, Mafia is joined by a guest who’s a Creative Director, Photographer, and Fashion Designer, her name is Jackie Bertolette. She shares her insight on fashion design and commercial art. If you liked this episode and think someone else would, too, please share it!

    GUEST LINKS:


    Twitter: https://twitter.com/OHFW_Official?s=20
    Instagram: www.instagram.com/ohfw_official
    Magazine: http://www.hauteohio.com/



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    Meet Rod Cate

    Meet Rod Cate

    Welcome to the first episode of Rocket Motivation with Rod Cate. On this episode, you will meet Rod Cate and hear his inspiration to start this podcast. Rod shares the story of his life-changing injury, his rehabilitation to learn to walk again, how he has built the life he loves, and what he learned from his journey from athlete to quadriplegic teenager to present-day lawyer, father, and husband. Plus, learn about the type of guests Rod will talk with over the first season and what you, the listener, will get from this inspirational podcast focused on overcoming adversity and building your best life.


    Check Out Rod's New Book "Get Back Up" >>> Buy Here


    Learn more about & contact Rod Cate:
    Rod Cate Website
    Twitter
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