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    44: Is He Wasting Your Time? (The Top 2 Red Flags to Watch For)

    enAugust 10, 2020

    Podcast Summary

    • Considering Both Actions and Words for Accurate UnderstandingWhen dealing with mixed signals, focus on both actions and words for a clearer picture of someone's intentions, rather than solely relying on one or the other.

      When dealing with mixed signals in relationships, it's essential to consider both actions and words to understand someone's true intentions. Matthew Hussey, in the discussed podcast, emphasizes the importance of not suffering longer than necessary and avoiding repeating costly mistakes. Traditional advice suggests focusing on actions over words, but actions can sometimes be romantic and words may not align with them. However, a commenter challenged this principle, suggesting considering both actions and words for a more accurate understanding. Ultimately, it's crucial to pay attention to both to avoid wasting time on someone who may not have long-term intentions. As always, feel free to send in your relationship questions or experiences to the podcast, and we may read some out on future episodes.

    • Understanding Intentions: Consider Both Words and ActionsIn relationships, consider both what people say and what they do to accurately gauge their intentions.

      Actions speak louder than words, especially when it comes to understanding someone's intentions. However, there are exceptions to this rule. If someone is telling you something that goes against their actions, or if they're selling you something and the small print reveals hidden truths, it's important to pay attention to those words. In the context of relationships, if someone expresses that they don't want a relationship but continues to invest time, energy, and emotions into the relationship, their actions may be conflicting with their words. In such cases, it's essential to consider both their actions and their words carefully to gain a clearer understanding of their intentions. The analogy of a pharmaceutical ad is a helpful way to remember this principle. While the commercial may show happy people and pleasant scenes, the small print reveals potential side effects. Similarly, in relationships, if someone is painting a rosy picture but their actions reveal something different, it's important to read the small print carefully. Overall, while actions are generally more reliable indicators of intentions, there are situations where words can provide valuable insights.

    • Actions speak louder than words in relationshipsPay attention to both what people say and how they act, address discrepancies, and learn effective communication skills to build stronger relationships.

      People's actions don't always align with their words, especially when it comes to relationships. Someone might tell you they don't want anything serious, but their behavior might suggest otherwise. This ambiguity can be confusing and frustrating. It's important to pay attention to both what people say and how they act. The speaker mentioned that such communication can be inconvenient for them, which is why they might not want to have the conversation in the first place. They might be hesitant to commit due to fear of losing something, such as a potential romantic partner or business opportunity. If you find yourself in a situation where someone's words and actions don't align, it's crucial to address the discrepancy. The speaker suggested checking out her program, "How to Talk to Men," which can help you navigate communication and build stronger relationships. By understanding the nuances of communication and learning how to express your needs and desires clearly, you can avoid misunderstandings and build more meaningful connections.

    Recent Episodes from Love Life with Matthew Hussey

    (Rewind): If You're Worried You Invest in a Relationship Too Quickly. . .

    (Rewind): If You're Worried You Invest in a Relationship Too Quickly. . .

    Do you find yourself always falling for a guy too fast?

    You go on a few dates, maybe you end up sleeping with him, and then… you’re totally hooked.

     Suddenly, he’s the #1 topic of conversation with you and your friends.

    You find yourself constantly wanting to text him. You sit at home wondering what he’s up to. You’re tempted to rush things forward.

    Wait. Stop. Relax.

    There’s nothing wrong with being a romantic, but you have to be so careful here to make the right decisions going forward.

    If you find your heart always investing in a guy when your head tells you to calm down, here’s the secret to taking back your power...

     

    >> Sign up Now For My Free Weekly Newsletter, The 3 Relationships at ... → http://www.The3Relationships.com

    >> Order My New Book, "Love Life" at → http:// www.LoveLifeBook.com

    >> FREE Video Training: "Dating With Results" → http:// http://www.DatingWithResults.com/

    251: "I Can’t Get Over My Ex...Please Help Me Move On!”

    251: "I Can’t Get Over My Ex...Please Help Me Move On!”
    When you've made progress getting over someone, then they send you a text, how should you react? Or maybe they still like your instagram posts, respond to your stories, or you see glimpses of their life with a new partner and it triggers you...

    In this episode, Matt and Audrey talk about how to deal with triggers that derail your progress and what to do when you're trying to move on for good and want to TRULY get over your ex. 

    >>> Transform Your Relationship with Life in 6 Magical Days...
    Learn More About My Live Retreat at → http://www.MHRetreat.com
     
    >>> Order My New Book, "Love Life" at → http:// www.LoveLifeBook.com
     
    >>> FREE Video Training: "Dating With Results" → http://www.DatingWithResults.com 

    (Matt Monday): Get Too Obsessed, Too Soon? WATCH THIS

    (Matt Monday): Get Too Obsessed, Too Soon? WATCH THIS
    Do you get obsessed too quickly in the early days of dating? This is often dangerous because it places WAY too much of our happiness in trying to attract and keep someone (even when we don’t really know them yet). 
     
    Thankfully, this kind of “anxious dating” is something you can actually solve. In today’s episode, I dive into where this obsession comes from, and give you 5 things you can do to stop falling for someone too quickly and self-sabotaging in early dating.

    >>> Transform Your Relationship with Life in 6 Magical Days...
    Learn More About My Live Retreat at → http://www.MHRetreat.com

    >>> Order My New Book, "Love Life" at → http:// www.LoveLifeBook.com

    >>> FREE Video Training: "Dating With Results" → http://www.DatingWithResults.com

    (Rewind): Why We Get Attracted to the Wrong People

    (Rewind): Why We Get Attracted to the Wrong People

    Do you ever find yourself getting attracted to people who are unavailable (emotionally or otherwise)? Treat you poorly? Or simply aren’t interested in you?

    Why does this happen? Why do we conveniently keep getting attracted to the least convenient people?

    It can be deeply frustrating, especially when there might be someone who does like us but who we just don’t want.

    In this episode, I explain two fundamental reasons why this keeps happening. 

    At the end of this video, I give you a practical “mind trick” you can do on yourself to change this...

    Learn the 2 mistakes that keep you from meeting the right person...

     

    >> Sign up Now For My Free Weekly Newsletter, The 3 Relationships at ... → http://www.The3Relationships.com

    >> Order My New Book, "Love Life" at → http:// www.LoveLifeBook.com

    >> FREE Video Training: "Dating With Results" → http:// http://www.DatingWithResults.com/

    250: “How Soon Can I Ask for Exclusivity?”

    250: “How Soon Can I Ask for Exclusivity?”
    When is the best time to ask the person you’re dating if they’re still dating other people? Is there a “sweet spot” during the dating process to have the exclusivity conversation? 

    In today’s podcast, you’ll learn how to balance emotional intuition with practical strategy . . . plus avoid emotional manipulators and love bombers in the process. You’ll also learn how important connection is (and when feeling it in the early days of dating can lead you down the wrong path, especially when chemistry is valued over compatibility). This episode will give you tools and mindsets to navigate the early days of dating with confidence!

    ►► Sign up Now For My Free Weekly Newsletter, The 3 Relationships at . . .
     
    ►► Order My New Book, "Love Life" at → http://www.LoveLifeBook.com
     
    ►► FREE Video Training: “Dating With Results” → http://www.DatingWithResults.com 

    (Matt Monday): How to Heal From a Narcissistic Relationship

    (Matt Monday): How to Heal From a Narcissistic Relationship
    In today’s new episode, an incredible member of my Club 320 inner circle asked 3 beautifully vulnerable questions (and gave me permission to share them with you). From a painful childhood to a 10-year relationship with a narcissist, she wanted to figure out how to release shame, heal, and find her true self. 
     
    No matter what your story is, you don’t have to carry this baggage forever. After listening to Cara’s story, you might start to look at your life, your history, and your future differently.

    ►► Sign up Now For My Free Weekly Newsletter, The 3 Relationships at . . .
     
    ►► Order My New Book, "Love Life" at → http://www.LoveLifeBook.com
     
    ►► FREE Video Training: “Dating With Results” → http://www.DatingWithResults.com 

    (Rewind): Don’t Avoid Difficult Conversations In Relationships. Do THIS…

    (Rewind): Don’t Avoid Difficult Conversations In Relationships. Do THIS…
    Sometimes we avoid speaking up about what we really want with a person because we're afraid we will "make waves" in the relationship.

    We come from a place of fear and anxiety. "What if me telling him I want something to be different makes him walk away altogether?" we think to ourselves.

    So we ignore the conversation and silently suffer.

    But then nothing gets better. We just put off the conversation for another day while time keeps moving on.
    If this is you, this episode is for you.

    >> Sign up Now For My Free Weekly Newsletter, The 3 Relationships at ... → http://www.The3Relationships.com**

    >> Order My New Book, "Love Life" at → http:// www.LoveLifeBook.com

    >>> FREE Video Training: "Dating With Results" → http:// http://www.DatingWithResults.com/

    (Matt Monday): Long Distance Relationship? AVOID This Mistake

    (Matt Monday): Long Distance Relationship? AVOID This Mistake
    Have you ever wondered how you can move on from someone you never dated? Perhaps you’ve been pining for them for months (or even years) . . . hoping they’ll finally notice you and see your value. 
     
    This great question is one of 7 I answer in today’s new episode, based on the comments you left me last week. I also dig into topics like:
     
    • What’s the best way to start a long-distance relationship?
    • What’s your dating advice for people over 40?
    • Why did they change their mind about being ready for a relationship?
     
    Don’t miss these, and once you’re done, be sure to send an email to podcast@matthewhussey.com with a question you’d like me to answer next time!

    ►► Sign up Now For My Free Weekly Newsletter, The 3 Relationships at . . .
     
    ►► Order My New Book, "Love Life" at → http://www.LoveLifeBook.com
     
    ►► FREE Video Training: “Dating With Results” → http://www.DatingWithResults.com

    (Rewind): Do You Feel You’re Giving Too Much in Relationships?

    (Rewind): Do You Feel You’re Giving Too Much in Relationships?

    What do you do when you’re a giving person but you feel like your kindness gets taken advantage of in relationships? Maybe you feel like you’re always the one trying and then your resentment builds up until one day you explode in anger. 

    In this video, I show you why we get trapped in the curse of people pleasing, how to set appropriate boundaries, and how to ask for what you need from someone you’re dating. 

    ---

    ►► Sign up Now For My Free Weekly Newsletter, The 3 Relationships at . . .
     
    ►► Order My New Book, "Love Life" at → http://www.LoveLifeBook.com
     
    ►► FREE Video Training: “Dating With Results” → http://www.DatingWithResults.com

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