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    • Personal Hygiene and Travel TipsMaintain personal hygiene, especially below the belt with Manscaped. Save money on travel by staying with friends, but be mindful of privacy.

      Personal hygiene is important, especially in the often-neglected areas below the belt. Manscaped offers solutions for trimming, cleansing, and maintaining men's intimate areas, ensuring freshness and confidence. Andrew Schultz, the podcast's guest, shared his unconventional approach to accommodation, preferring to save money by staying on friends' couches instead of expensive hotels. The discussion also touched on the convenience of digital locks and the potential risks of sharing personal information. Overall, the episode emphasized the importance of taking care of oneself and being mindful of privacy.

    • Overcoming Relationship ChallengesDiscovering a partner's infidelity can lead to personal growth and the recognition of the importance of facing difficult emotions. Everyone has a fundamental need for connection and intimacy, and seeking support is key when facing personal struggles.

      Everyone goes through challenging experiences in life, and while some may lead to negative consequences, others can serve as catalysts for growth and change. The speaker in this conversation shared an experience of discovering his partner had been unfaithful, which led him to reflect on his own behaviors and desires. He acknowledged his past actions as being hurtful, but also recognized the importance of facing difficult emotions and moving forward. The conversation then shifted to discussing the complexities of human sexuality and the potential impact of traumatic experiences. Ultimately, the speaker expressed the belief that everyone has a fundamental need for connection and intimacy, and that it's important to seek support when facing personal struggles.

    • Unexpected generosity at Burning ManBurning Man defied the speaker's skepticism with a gifting economy, teaching him that people can be kind and selfless, even in the desert conditions.

      Despite growing up in a big city and carrying a natural skepticism, the speaker found unexpected generosity and connection at the Burning Man festival. Contrary to his expectations, this event operated on a gifting economy where people gave freely without the exchange of money. The speaker was touched by the simple gifts he received, such as pink Starburst and ChapStick, which brought joy to people in the harsh desert conditions. The experience taught him that people are capable of kindness and selflessness, even in the most unexpected places. The speaker plans to offer hand sanitizer as a gift the next time he attends, recognizing the value of contributing to the community in a meaningful way.

    • Unique Professions and PassionsDespite the rarity of unconventional professions, everyone has unique talents and passions that bring joy and value to the world, and it's essential to embrace individuality and follow dreams.

      The world has many unique professions and passions, but the number of professionals in any given field is much smaller than the total population. Using comedy as an example, there are likely fewer than 500 professional comedians out of the world's 7.5 billion people. Similarly, there are professional dart players, poker players, and even hula hoopers at Burning Man, a festival originally created for tech workers seeking a break from the rat race. The rarity of these professions doesn't diminish their value or the joy they bring to those who pursue them. It's essential to remember that everyone has unique talents and passions, no matter how unconventional they may seem. The world needs more people embracing their individuality and following their dreams, even if they seem unlikely or impossible to others.

    • Living freely through financial independenceFinancial independence allows individuals to prioritize passions over necessities, leading to a more fulfilling life.

      Financial independence is a key factor in truly living and making meaningful choices, free from the constraints of financial obligations. According to the speaker, reaching a certain financial stability or "breach" allows individuals to prioritize their desires and passions over financial necessities. The speaker uses the example of Seth Rogen, who seems to be living freely due to his financial success. The idea is that once individuals have enough financial security, they can focus on the deeper meaning of life, rather than just surviving. However, the speaker also acknowledges that this perspective may not apply to everyone, especially those who are struggling to make ends meet. The speaker also criticizes Elon Musk for focusing on creating ways to survive, rather than enjoying the wealth he has already accumulated. Overall, the message is that financial independence is a crucial step towards living a fulfilling life.

    • Perception of value influenced by costPeople assume free services lack value due to societal norms in capitalistic societies. This perception can devalue things and make it hard to accept truly free services.

      People's perception of value is influenced by the cost associated with it. In the discussion, the speakers expressed their skepticism towards seemingly free services like Amazon Alexa, assuming they have hidden costs or lack value due to being free. This is a reflection of the societal norm in capitalistic societies where the assumption is that if something is free, it probably doesn't have value. This perception can also lead to devaluing things that should have value, such as comedy or art, when they are given away for free. The speakers also noted the contrast between Burning Man, where the exchange of gifts creates a tangible sense of value, and the intangible nature of exchanges in modern society, making it difficult for people to accept the idea of truly free services.

    • Impact of comping on comedy ticket salesExcessive comping has led to audience expectation of free comedy, negatively impacting ticket sales for clubs and financially hurting comedians. Encouraging ticket sales and booking high-quality acts can create a valuable experience and attract wealthier audiences.

      The devaluation of comedy tickets due to excessive comping has led to an expectation among audiences that comedy is free. This mindset negatively impacts comedy clubs, as they increasingly rely on paper sales to fill rooms. To combat this, it's crucial for comedians to encourage ticket sales and for clubs to book high-quality acts. This approach not only helps comedians financially but also creates a desirable atmosphere where audiences feel they've invested in a valuable experience. Additionally, understanding the motivations and behaviors of wealthy individuals can provide insights into their desire for exclusivity and the importance of creating a desirable, inclusive environment. Ultimately, by encouraging ticket sales and providing a valuable experience, comedians and clubs can thrive in an industry that often struggles with monetization.

    • The Complexity of Property OwnershipThough we believe we own property outright, ongoing expenses and the complexities of land ownership challenge that notion. Ownership involves responsibilities and costs.

      While we may hold legal titles to property and believe we own it outright, there are ongoing expenses like property taxes that challenge that notion. Even the concept of land ownership is complex, as Ian Edwards points out, since we're still paying someone for various services, such as roads and security. It's important to remember that ownership comes with responsibilities and costs, and the idea of absolute ownership without paying anything is a myth. This discussion highlights the nuanced nature of property rights and the ongoing relationship between individuals and their communities and governments.

    • The Challenges of Finding Contentment in LALA's distractions and FOMO culture can make it hard to focus on relationships and cherish family, but emotional stability is key to navigating its wealth and freedom.

      Los Angeles, with its constant FOMO culture and distractions, can make it difficult for individuals to find contentment and focus on personal relationships. The speaker shares his personal experience of feeling overwhelmed in large social situations and the challenge of being far from family. However, he also acknowledges the extreme wealth and freedom that exists in LA, which can lead to unbalanced and potentially harmful behaviors. Ultimately, the speaker emphasizes the importance of cherishing family and maintaining emotional stability in a world that often encourages constant distraction and pursuit of more.

    • Wealth shields individuals from legal consequencesWealthy individuals often face fewer consequences for breaking the law due to their financial means, creating an unequal justice system. Those without financial resources face significant repercussions.

      Wealth can shield individuals from the consequences of breaking the law. The speaker shares an example of a Saudi prince who was caught but faced no significant repercussions. The speaker then relates this to his own experience of getting a speeding ticket and paying the fee, contrasting it with the experience of those who don't have the financial means to pay. The speaker emphasizes the importance of staying humble and appreciative, but also acknowledges the pressure to keep up with a certain lifestyle as wealth increases. The conversation also touches on the idea that the cost of living becomes less noticeable as one's wealth grows. Ultimately, the discussion highlights the unequal treatment and disadvantages faced by those without financial resources.

    • Our relationship with money is influenced by experiences and circumstancesOur perception of money's value changes based on personal experiences and circumstances, affecting our spending habits and awareness of cost.

      Our perception of money and its value changes based on our experiences and circumstances. When we have enough, we may not even think about the cost of things, while those who struggle with budgets may place more value on every dollar. The use of cash can make us more aware of the cost, and convenience can lead us to spend more. The experience and comfort we seek can also influence our spending habits. For instance, at an airport, we might forget the value of money when buying something we need urgently, like headphones. Best Buy, with its vast selection and salespeople, can make it even harder to assess the true value of products. Overall, our relationship with money is complex and influenced by various factors.

    • Assigning knowledgeable brand reps to retail storesInvesting in knowledgeable and passionate brand reps in retail stores could lead to improved customer experience, increased sales, and potentially even reduced safety concerns.

      Companies could significantly improve the customer experience and sales by assigning knowledgeable and passionate brand representatives to retail stores. This approach is similar to how Apple operates with certified retailers, where dedicated staff members provide expert advice and personalized recommendations. The speaker uses the example of the liquor industry, which successfully employs this strategy, to illustrate the potential benefits. Despite the potential costs, the speaker argues that investing in this approach could be more cost-effective than corporations' wasteful spending on other areas. The discussion also touches on the topic of safety concerns in the Dominican Republic and the speaker's theory that terrorism is less likely to occur in places where people are enjoying themselves and having a good time.

    • Complex power dynamics in certain areasBe aware of complex power dynamics and potential risks when traveling to unfamiliar places, as external interference can lead to dangerous consequences

      The situation in certain areas, such as the Dominican Republic, can involve complex power dynamics and potentially dangerous circumstances. Local thugs, who may be involved in illegal activities like selling drugs, also play a role in maintaining order within their communities. However, when external forces, like governments, try to disrupt their operations, there can be serious consequences. These consequences can include backlash from the thugs and potential harm to tourists, which can lead to negative publicity and economic losses. The death of tourists in such areas can ignite a strong reaction from the public and media in their home countries, making it a sensitive issue. It's important to be aware of these complexities and potential risks when traveling to unfamiliar places.

    • Unexpected challenges in traveling to developing areasTraveling to new places can bring unexpected challenges, from minor inconveniences to significant issues, but also broadens one's perspective and understanding of the world.

      Traveling to certain places, especially those with developing infrastructure, can come with unexpected challenges. These challenges can range from minor inconveniences, like not being able to flush toilet paper, to more significant issues, like unreliable infrastructure. The speaker shares his experiences in Costa Rica, where he encountered such challenges and had to adapt. He also mentions that in some areas, addresses are not based on numbers but on landmarks or colors, which can be confusing for those accustomed to grid systems. Despite these challenges, the speaker expresses a sense of fascination and appreciation for these experiences, which broadens one's perspective and understanding of the world. In essence, traveling to new places can be an adventure, filled with unexpected challenges and rewards.

    • Frustrations with technology and conveniencePeople feel frustrated and angry when faced with minor inconveniences or changes in their reliance on technology for navigation and event attendance, leading to feelings of being taken advantage of and a loss of direct connection.

      Our reliance on technology and convenience has led us to become frustrated and even angry when faced with minor inconveniences or changes. For example, the speaker expresses frustration with confusing street names and navigation issues, as well as the high fees and data collection practices of ticket selling platforms like Ticketmaster. In the past, people could more easily navigate their communities and attend events without the need for technology, but now, we have come to expect and even rely on these conveniences. The speaker's anger towards Ticketmaster highlights the feeling of being taken advantage of and the loss of direct connection with fans. Ultimately, the speaker's rant reflects the complex relationship we have with technology and the frustration that comes with its limitations and hidden costs.

    • Artists Seeking Control Over Ticketing and Fan EngagementArtists are exploring alternative ticketing systems to bypass high fees and gain control over fan connections and performance spaces, fostering more authentic and personal performances.

      The current ticketing system, dominated by companies like Ticketmaster, leaves artists and smaller performers at a disadvantage. These companies charge high fees for services like data access and advertising, and often own the venues and staff, leaving artists with little control over their fan connections and performance spaces. To counter this, some artists are exploring alternative ticketing systems that put them in direct contact with their fans, allowing for more intimate and unique performances in various types of venues. This shift towards artist-controlled ticketing and fan engagement can lead to a more authentic and personal connection between performers and their audiences.

    • Sharing data and resources for mutual benefitSuccessful artists prioritize transparency and collaboration, sharing data and resources with venues and fans to build stronger connections and grow in the industry.

      Successful artists value transparency and collaboration over control and greed. The speaker in this conversation emphasizes the importance of sharing data and resources with venues and fans, rather than hoarding them for personal gain. He believes that this approach not only benefits the artist but also creates a stronger connection with their audience. The speaker also encourages continuous growth and improvement in the industry, drawing an analogy between the business and tide pools, filled with ups and downs and the need to stick it out through the waves. The conversation also touches on the importance of intimacy and connection in an industry that can sometimes feel disconnected, leading the speaker to explore new avenues like podcasting and collaborating with other artists to build a community and engage more deeply with fans.

    • Authenticity and fan connectionAuthenticity and engagement with fans are crucial for a successful career. Keanu Reeves' mysterious persona and genuine love for his craft resonate with audiences, leaving a lasting impression.

      Authenticity and connection with fans are key to maintaining a successful career. The speaker shares his experience of giving away content and receiving gifts from fans, emphasizing the importance of proximity and engagement in today's entertainment industry. He also discusses how Keanu Reeves' mysterious and intriguing persona has resonated with audiences due to his genuine love for his craft and lack of desperation for fame. The speaker admires Reeves' honest answer to a difficult question on a talk show and sees it as an example of authenticity that leaves a lasting impression on fans.

    • The Entertainment Industry's Demands Can Harm Talented IndividualsBalance and learning to say no are crucial for artists in the entertainment industry to avoid being 'bled out'. Creating opportunities for yourself is key to success.

      The entertainment industry can be overwhelming and often pushes talented individuals too hard, potentially causing harm. People like Tiffany Haddish are beloved but can be "bled out" by the industry's relentless demands. Balance is crucial, and learning to say no is essential. Some artists, like Will Ferrell, have managed to navigate the industry successfully, but it's a challenge for many. The industry's focus on diversity can sometimes be disingenuous, and people just want opportunities and resources. Ultimately, creating opportunities for yourself is the key to success, as demonstrated by figures like Tyler Perry and Byron Allen.

    • The Evolution of Comedy: Pushing Boundaries and Challenging NormsComedians have faced challenges throughout history but have used them to create groundbreaking comedy. Today, they must be precise and innovative to keep audiences engaged and challenge societal norms.

      Comedy has evolved significantly over the years, and the stakes are higher now than ever before. During the PC movement, comedians faced arrests, fines, and backlash for pushing boundaries. However, these challenges fueled their creativity and led to some of the best comedy writing in history. Today, comedians must use a scalpel to craft their jokes and find unique angles to make audiences laugh. The best comedians continue to push back against societal norms and provide balance through their humor. Ultimately, comedy is an essential tool for delivering truths and perspectives that might otherwise be overlooked or ignored. As Colin Quinn noted, comedians are not here to walk in lockstep with conventional wisdom but to challenge it and keep audiences engaged. So, we continue to come forward with our unique perspectives, making the world a little less crazy, one laugh at a time.

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    The dream:

    A recurring dream I have had for years. I am in someone else’s house and unable to find my way to my bedroom to sleep. I open doors and wander corridors. There are other people around. Sometimes I find my room to find other people in my bed. Sometimes the house is a holiday cottage or a university hall of residence, or a hotel or a huge rambling house. I never find a place to sleep.

    At Home in the World: Sounds and Symmetries of Belonging (Zurich Lecture Series in Analytical Psychology) by John Hill 

    Link: http://a.co/gTkuyoP

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    Books:

    The Inner World of Trauma and The Soul and Trauma by Donald Kalsched, PhD. Available on Amazon.

    E362 Viall Files: Memorable Moments from 2021

    E362 Viall Files: Memorable Moments from 2021

    Today we’re celebrating the end of 2021 and another year of Viall Files! In this episode we’ll go through some highlights from the year, talking about highs, controversies, regrets, and everything in-between! We start off this episode by highlighting things that happened in our lives: from vibrating underwear, butterflies, and Meatball-gate! We also highlight interviews such as with Tinx, Steve-O, Andy Grammer, and Olivia O’Brien. Each interview taught us something unique about love and life and we wanted to show the best moments in conversation. We talk some regrets from this year, where we could have gone deeper with Katie speaking poorly of Thomas and Nikki explaining a theory from a book she read that, at the time, made our heads turn. Next we thank all of our Ask Nick callers and highlight some great takeaways from the year. We close with discussing the controversy with Gaslighting and the various conversations we had to find out when to use a term and the benefits and harm in defining a behavior. 

    Thank you so much for listening this year! We look forward to 2022! 

    Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to asknick@kastmedia.com to be a part of our Monday episodes. 

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    Escape From Zombieland | Koshin Paley Ellison

    Escape From Zombieland | Koshin Paley Ellison
    Modern life has turned many of us into zombies. We walk around with our noses in our phones, constantly on the hunt. We’re not looking to eat people’s brains, per se, but we are looking for mindless hits of dopamine -- from the latest headline, email, text, or “like” on our Instagram post. This has profound consequences, for us as individuals and for the society as a whole.  Our guest in this episode argues that we need to wake up to this, and learn how to create human connection. Koshin Paley Ellison is an author, Zen priest, and Jungian psychotherapist. He co-founded the New York Zen Center for Contemplative Care and is the author of Wholehearted: Slow Down, Help Out, Wake Up. Ellison dives into his attempts to rescue the cliche of intimacy, how to build meaningful relationships, and what it means to “Find Your Five.” He also discusses how experimenting with what he calls "healthy embarrassment" (or allowing yourself to feel exposed) makes for better relationships. In fact, he’ll model some of that for us, quite bravely.  Just a note: This is a re-run from a few years back. We’re re-running a few episodes this summer to give our staff a break, and also to get some of our favorite older episodes into the ears of our many new listeners. Also: This conversation includes references to sensitive topics, including lived experiences of hatred and abuse. That said, it happens in the context of discussions about vulnerability and healing. Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/koshin-paley-ellison-repost See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.