Podcast Summary
Cultivating trusting relationships with inner parts for nervous system health: Practicing nervous system regulation and using tools like somatic yes, no's, sensory stimulus, and meditation helps create safety and connection with inner parts, promoting healing and resilience.
Our relationships, including the relationship with ourselves and our inner parts, significantly impact our nervous system health. Dysregulation in relationships, including those with ourselves, is inevitable, and it's essential to cultivate a trusting relationship with these parts to promote healing and resilience. By using nervous system regulation practices and tools like somatic yes, no's, sensory stimulus, and meditation, we can create safety and connection with these parts, helping them to feel seen and understood. This approach allows for integration and growth, ultimately leading to a more embodied and whole self. Trauma resolution goes beyond talking about the past and requires a deeper, embodied approach to healing.
Acknowledging and honoring all parts of ourselves for personal growth and well-being: To live fully and authentically, we must recognize and address the complex aspects of ourselves, including past traumas, through deep self-compassion and healing.
Our experiences, both past and present, live within us at both the intellectual and nervous system levels. This means that we are complex beings made up of multiple parts or aspects of ourselves, some of which may be frozen or traumatized. Ignoring these parts does not make them disappear, but rather, they continue to influence our behavior and relationships, both internal and external. To live fully and authentically, it is essential to acknowledge and honor these parts of ourselves, allowing for deep self-compassion and healing. This process can be challenging and uncomfortable, but it is necessary for personal growth and well-being. By being present to our experiences and emotions, we can begin to address and work through the traumas that reside within us, ultimately leading to greater self-awareness, resilience, and overall wellness.
Recognizing and acknowledging our inner parts for personal growth: Failing to acknowledge our inner parts can lead to conflict and disempowerment, but engaging in inner conversation and focusing on regulation with the Neurosequential Model can lead to greater self-awareness and personal growth.
Recognizing and acknowledging the various aspects of ourselves, even the ones we don't like or find challenging, is crucial for personal growth. If we fail to do so, we may end up projecting these qualities onto others, creating conflict and disempowerment. By engaging in inner conversation with these parts, we can begin the healing process and reclaim our inner power. The Neurosequential Model in particular can help us cut through the noise and focus on our own regulation, enabling us to identify and address the autonomous parts of ourselves that are seeking attention. While this work can be difficult and uncomfortable, the rewards are profound, leading to greater self-awareness and personal growth.
Understanding and managing dysregulated states with Neurosequential Integration: Neurosequential Integration (NSI) helps individuals recognize and address dysregulated states, enabling deeper psychological work and enhancing overall well-being. It's a complementary approach, not a replacement for other modalities.
Neurosequential Integration (NSI) provides efficient tools to help individuals become more aware of and manage their dysregulated states, making it possible for them to engage in deeper psychological work. The speaker shares her personal experience of struggling with dysregulation, which prevented her from fully engaging in her desired psychological work. NSI gave her the language, framework, and tools to recognize and address subtle stages of dysregulation, allowing her to dedicate more time to other modalities like parts work. The speaker emphasizes that NSI is not a replacement for other modalities but rather a complementary approach that enhances overall well-being and availability for various aspects of personal growth. NSI's efficiency in addressing dysregulation is a significant advantage for individuals dealing with complex trauma, as it allows them to work directly with their nervous system to create a sense of safety and enable them to connect with and express repressed parts of themselves.
Healing from sexual trauma: A journey of self-discovery and societal change: Embrace the challenging journey of healing from sexual trauma through individual practices like SI and societal change, focusing on presence, embodiment, and self-discovery.
Healing from complex trauma related to sexuality requires both individual and societal support. The speaker shares her experience of wanting to connect with parts of herself that have been harmed, sexualized, or demonized. She describes the process as challenging and effortful, like trying to climb an ice wall with clamps and picks. She emphasizes the importance of tools, such as Somatic Intelligence (SI), that help identify and address the physical sensations in the body, rather than just sitting with them. The speaker also highlights the importance of cultivating practices to develop presence and embodiment, starting with sensory exploration and body mapping, and moving towards learning about pleasure and self-touch. She emphasizes that this journey is not just about individual healing, but also about addressing the societal pressures and expectations that contribute to trauma and dissociation. The speaker encourages embracing the journey of coming home to oneself, with all its complexities and challenges, and the importance of having the time and space to do so.
Understanding the Complexity of Sexual Healing and Exploration: Approach sexual healing and exploration with patience, self-awareness, and a deep understanding of the nervous system to deepen relationships and gain valuable insights.
Our bodies and sexual experiences are complex and multifaceted, and cannot be reduced to simple cause-and-effect mechanisms. Memories and emotional connections associated with sexuality can take time to uncover, and the context and inner emotional states play significant roles in our experiences. Our bodies do not function like machines, and our pleasure and sexuality are influenced by various factors including nervous system state, inner figures, and fantasies. It's important to approach sexual healing and exploration with patience, self-awareness, and a deep understanding of the nervous system. By recognizing the complexity of our experiences and practicing self-regulation, we can deepen our relationships with ourselves and others, and return with valuable insights and growth.
Measuring and transforming nervous system responses for improved well-being: NSI training combines psychology and neuroscience to help individuals objectively measure and transform their nervous system responses, leading to improved mood, mindset, emotions, reactivity, and biases. It includes an ICF-accredited course and can bring lasting change at the level of the nervous system for clients.
Neuro Somatic Intelligence (NSI) training combines psychology and neuroscience to help individuals and practitioners objectively measure and transform their nervous system responses to sensory input, leading to improved mood, mindset, emotions, reactivity, and biases. This training, which includes an ICF-accredited course, can bring lasting change at the level of the nervous system for clients. Another key point discussed was the importance of understanding individual thresholds for pleasure and recognizing that more is not always better. The conversation also touched on the complexities of dealing with another person's relationship to pleasure, pain, and regulation. NSI tools have been found to support women, especially those who have difficulty experiencing orgasms, by helping them take ownership of their nervous systems and pleasure. It's essential to remember that experiencing orgasms is a gift from oneself to oneself, and various factors, including psychological and physiological reasons, can impact the ability to do so. By focusing on both nervous system regulation and pleasure, individuals can achieve greater alignment and overall well-being.
Practicing neuro somatic intelligence (NSI) for enhanced sexual experiences: Integrating NSI techniques like near-far drills during sex can lead to positive responses, increased presence, compassion, curiosity, and joy.
Understanding the nervous system and practicing neuro somatic intelligence (NSI) can greatly enhance sexual experiences by allowing individuals to fully integrate pleasure, regulate emotions, and come out of dissociative states during sex. NSI techniques, such as near-far drills, can be used during sexual activities to produce positive responses and create new experiences instead of dysregulation. By weaving NSI practices into daily life, individuals can build capacity and use high-payoff tools to transform negative experiences into positive ones. This approach can lead to increased presence, compassion, curiosity, and exploration during sexual experiences, ultimately fostering greater freedom, liberation, and joy.
Understanding and addressing disconnection during sex: Acknowledge and invite parts of self that deny pleasure, rather than judging or labeling them, to reclaim sexual selfhood and experience greater joy and connection.
Dissociation during sex is common but can hinder the experience of pleasure and consent. The speaker shares her personal experience of feeling disconnected during sexual encounters and how she trained her partners to accommodate her needs. However, this did not fully solve the issue as she still struggled to stay present and enjoy the moment. She encourages acknowledging and understanding the parts of oneself that may be denying pleasure, rather than judging or labeling them. By inviting these parts to the conversation and seeking their wisdom, individuals can potentially reclaim their sexual selfhood and experience greater joy and connection. The speaker also highlights the importance of addressing shame and denial surrounding pleasure, especially for those who may have had limited or negative sexual education.
Understanding Dissociation and Sexual Fawning: Dissociation and sexual fawning are distinct but can overlap. Dissociation means not being present during sex, while fawning can be performative. Explore hidden parts, name them, and have conversations to understand and heal.
Sexual fawning and dissociation are not the same thing, but they can overlap. Dissociation means not being present during sex, while sexual fawning can be performative. It's essential to understand the difference and the potential consequences of each. When dissociating, one may lose their voice, time, and ability to consent, making it crucial to explore the parts of oneself that hide and perform. It's important to have conversations with these parts, giving them names, ages, and characteristics, to better understand them. Dissociation is a protective response, and with neuroplasticity, it's possible to gradually bring oneself back to feeling sensations and safety. Remember, you deserve better than performing a service or staying in a cycle of sexual fawning. Instead, focus on building a deeper connection with your partner and yourself.
Exploring the connection between sexual experiences and the vagus nerve: Cervical orgasms can activate the vagus nerve, promoting relaxation. Everyone's sexual response is unique, and exploring the sexual shadow can lead to new experiences and self-awareness.
Our sexual experiences are deeply connected to our nervous system, specifically the vagus nerve, and the type of orgasm we experience can have an impact on our overall well-being. Some people may find that cervical orgasms, which involve the stimulation of the cervix, can help activate the vagus nerve and promote relaxation. However, it's important to note that everyone's sexual response is unique, and not all orgasms may have the same effect. Additionally, exploring our sexual shadow, or the parts of ourselves we have not yet integrated, can help us deepen our understanding of our sexual selves and lead to new and pleasurable experiences. Jolie Kim, a sex educator and coach, offers a masterclass to help individuals navigate their sexual shadow and discover new sources of pleasure and self-awareness. Ultimately, the goal is to approach our sexuality with curiosity, openness, and a willingness to explore the full range of our experiences.