Logo

    Melinda Gates: Why Your Perfectionism Has Been Draining You & 7 Reasons You Should Spend Time Alone in Silence Today

    enJuly 08, 2024
    How did Melinda French Gates view change throughout her life?
    What values were instilled in Melinda by her parents?
    Why is accepting help from others important, according to Melinda?
    What challenges does Melinda believe women and people of color face?
    What are the benefits of a goal-oriented mindset during formative years?

    Podcast Summary

    • Embracing ChangeEmbracing change can lead to personal growth and new experiences, instilled in Melinda by her parents, who encouraged higher education and adapting to new environments. Change can be scary but can also bring excitement and learning.

      Embracing change and viewing it as an opportunity for growth rather than a threat can lead to personal growth and new experiences. This mindset was instilled in Melinda French Gates from a young age by her parents, who constantly encouraged her to seek higher education and adapt to new environments. Throughout her life, Melinda has embraced change, from going away for college to starting a new job at Microsoft, and has found joy and excitement in the new opportunities that come with it. Change can be scary for some, but as Melinda shows, it can also be a source of excitement and learning. So next time you face a change, try to embrace it with an open mind and see where it takes you.

    • Personal Growth through ExperiencesEncouragement from parents to attend an out-of-state college and set personal goals led Melinda Gates to personal growth and opportunities beyond imagination. Values like silence, service, and gratitude have stayed with her and influenced her work.

      Having a goal-oriented mindset and being open to new experiences, especially during formative years, can lead to personal growth and opportunities beyond imagination. Melinda Gates shares how her parents' encouragement to attend an out-of-state college and set personal goals shaped her life, leading her to Duke University and eventually to a career at Microsoft and the Gates Foundation. The values she learned, such as the importance of silence, service, and gratitude, have stayed with her and influenced her work. By sharing her goals with trusted individuals, she was able to receive support and encouragement, ultimately helping her achieve her dreams. The value of setting aside quiet time for self-reflection and practicing gratitude remains a crucial part of her daily life.

    • Navigating challenges with mentors and advisorsHaving a supportive network can help individuals learn valuable lessons, including the importance of understanding history and its impact on societal issues, and the realization that the world isn't built equally for everyone. It's crucial to stay true to one's values while making a positive impact.

      Having a supportive network of mentors and advisors is crucial when setting and achieving goals. This can help individuals navigate challenges and learn valuable lessons. One such lesson that was shared was the realization that the world isn't built for everyone equally, and there are often barriers for women and people of color that don't exist for men. This was exemplified in the speaker's experience in computer science and her later work with the foundation. Another important lesson was the importance of understanding history and its impact on current societal issues, as seen in the lack of women's rights in the US Constitution and the historical opposition to contraceptives. Navigating complex and challenging situations, especially when they involve personal values and beliefs, requires time for reflection and careful consideration. The speaker emphasized the importance of staying true to one's values while also finding ways to make a positive impact.

    • Self-reflection and growthSelf-reflection and introspection are essential for personal growth, involving questioning beliefs, acknowledging imperfections, and seeking support from trusted individuals.

      Self-reflection and introspection are crucial before making significant decisions or taking bold steps. The speaker's journey involved questioning her beliefs, wrestling with imposter syndrome, and seeking support from trusted individuals. She emphasized the importance of acknowledging imperfections and embracing them to grow and become a more integrated and whole person. It's essential to recognize that everyone experiences self-doubt and that there's value in embracing our imperfections and learning from them. The process of self-discovery may take time, but the courage to take that first step can lead to further growth and confidence to tackle future challenges.

    • Spiritual communityForming and maintaining a spiritual community enhances personal growth and well-being, providing a trusted space for sharing innermost thoughts and offering support during challenging times.

      Forming and maintaining a spiritual community or tribe can significantly enhance personal growth and well-being. The woman in this discussion formed a spiritual group with other women in 2001, and they have continued to meet monthly, read spiritual texts, and practice daily silence. They also go on silent retreats together annually. This group has become a central part of her life, providing a trusted space for sharing innermost thoughts and offering support during challenging times. The group's longevity and deep connections demonstrate the power of peer relationships and the importance of having a community to lean on during different stages of life. Embracing past experiences and making amends can also contribute to a greater sense of self-acceptance and authenticity.

    • Inner voice of perfectionismIdentifying self-judgment areas, letting go of perfection, and practicing self-compassion are essential for personal growth and meaningful connections.

      Recognizing and addressing the inner voice of perfectionism and self-judgment is crucial for personal growth and building meaningful connections with others. This process involves identifying the areas where self-judgment occurs, learning to let go of the need for perfection, and practicing self-compassion. By focusing on being present and humanizing ourselves, we can develop grace and cultivate deeper relationships. This was particularly challenging during difficult experiences, such as going through a divorce. However, with time and effort, it is possible to give ourselves grace and move forward with resilience.

    • Healing from lossHealing from loss takes time but with faith, a strong support system, and the ability to hold joy and sadness side by side, it's possible to find beauty and joy again.

      Going through challenging times, such as the end of a long-term relationship or the loss of a loved one, can be incredibly difficult and emotionally taxing. It's normal to feel a range of intense emotions, including sadness, anger, and disbelief. However, it's important to remember that there can be beauty on the other side. It may take time to heal and find joy again, but it's possible. Having faith, a strong support system, and the ability to hold joy and sadness side by side can help navigate these difficult emotions. Remember, you're not alone, and it's okay to lean on others for comfort and guidance during these challenging times.

    • Community and EmpowermentAccepting help from others and building strong communities are crucial for personal and professional success. Empowering women and people of color is essential to create a more equitable world.

      We cannot go through life alone, and it's essential to accept help from others when needed. This was a revelation for the speaker, who had a hard time accepting help herself despite being good at helping others. She emphasized that we can only truly succeed in various aspects of life, including our professional pursuits and personal relationships, with the support of a community. Another significant issue the speaker highlighted is the need to empower women and people of color to step into their full power everywhere in the world. This involves breaking down social norms, investing in women-led and people of color businesses, and creating policies that reflect all of society. The speaker believes that if we don't address this issue, we will continue to fall backward and face numerous challenges. The speaker also shared her personal experience of facing bias and being held to different standards based on her background. She encouraged recognizing and challenging these biases to create a more equitable world where everyone has the opportunity to succeed. In summary, the importance of community, accepting help, and empowering women and people of color to step into their power are the key takeaways from the discussion.

    • Challenges faced by children despite advantagesParents can help children navigate unique challenges, including those related to gender, race, and public recognition, by supporting them, connecting them to networks, and instilling values.

      Despite the advantages some children may have, such as being educated in equal schools or growing up in privileged environments, they may still face barriers and challenges, particularly those related to gender and race, in the workforce and beyond. Parents can help by supporting their children, connecting them to networks, and instilling values of kindness, talent development, and giving back to the community. Another challenge for some children, especially those with famous parents, is navigating public recognition. Parents can mitigate this by keeping their children's lives as normal as possible, setting clear rules and expectations, and having open conversations about their values and goals. Overall, it's important for parents to recognize and address the unique challenges their children face and support them in becoming the best versions of themselves.

    • Parenting in Modern EducationEncourage service and giving back to the community, regardless of financial means, to instill a sense of purpose and make a difference in people's lives. Start small and recognize individual impact.

      The use of social media in modern education has significantly changed the parenting experience compared to previous generations. While rules and boundaries are important, encouraging service and giving back to the community, regardless of financial means, is essential for instilling a sense of purpose and making a difference in people's lives. The speaker emphasizes the importance of starting small and recognizing the value of individual impact, as well as the need to shift societal priorities to reward and recognize those who serve and make a difference in their communities.

    • Shifting definition of achievement and successThe importance of recognizing individuals who make a difference at the grassroots level and shifting society's focus from wealth to service and giving back.

      Society's definition of achievement and success needs to shift from wealth and material possessions to service and giving back to others. Melinda French Gates emphasized the importance of recognizing and appreciating individuals who make a difference at the grassroots level. She also shared valuable lessons, including the importance of being true to oneself and the value of active listening in parenting. The conversation highlighted the potential in everyone and the need to break down barriers and biases to unlock that potential. If every place of power was accompanied by a woman or a person of color, it would create a more inclusive world. Overall, the episode underscored the importance of authenticity, compassion, and community in achieving personal growth and making a positive impact on the world.

    Recent Episodes from On Purpose with Jay Shetty

    Nicky Jam: How to Forgive Yourself From the Past & Free Yourself From Shame and Trauma

    Nicky Jam: How to Forgive Yourself From the Past & Free Yourself From Shame and Trauma

    Are you struggling to overcome your past trauma?

    Are you looking for ways to heal from it?

    Today, Jay sits down with renowned reggaeton artist and songwriter Nicky Jam. Nicky's music career took off after a series of successful mixtapes and collaborations with other artists, including Daddy Yankee, with whom he formed the iconic duo Los Cangris. His work has earned him international fame and multiple awards, establishing him as a major influence in the reggaeton and Latin trap genres. 

    Nicky recounts his first foray into music, packing groceries and freestyling at a supermarket, which inadvertently launched his career despite his young age and the informal nature of his work. He opens up about the difficulties of his upbringing, including his mother’s struggle with substance abuse and prostitution, shaping his understanding of normalcy and family life. This background set the stage for his initial break into the music industry, where early rejections and setbacks paved the way for his eventual success in the Puerto Rican mixtape scene and beyond.

    Together with Jay, Nicky also discusses the challenges of maintaining authenticity and personal happiness amidst fame, expressing discomfort with being seen as a role model and emphasizing the importance of understanding and support for mental health, especially for men in the public eye. Despite ongoing struggles with PTSD, anxiety, and the scars of his traumatic past, Nicky remains hopeful and driven, looking forward to continuing his career and making a positive impact through his work and personal experiences.

    In this interview, you'll learn:

    How to handle early setbacks

    How to deal with the pressure of expectations

    How to use personal struggles as a source of strength

    How to maintain creativity under pressure

    How to find redemption through new opportunities

    How to help others through your work

    Nicky's story demonstrates that with unwavering determination and a genuine approach, it's possible to transform challenging beginnings into legacies of success and enduring influence.

    With Love and Gratitude,

    Jay Shetty

    What We Discuss:

    • 00:00 Intro
    • 03:12 Earliest Childhood Memory
    • 04:06 First Deal
    • 06:44 I Was Happy with the Album
    • 08:15 Life on the Streets
    • 12:06 There’s a Different World Out There
    • 15:22 Looking for Billy
    • 17:20 Simpler or Complicated Life?
    • 19:05 Commands Don’t Work on Me
    • 24:58 Battling Alcohol Addiction
    • 31:06 Drug and Alcohol Problem
    • 34:20 Finding Help
    • 36:40 Feeling Alone
    • 39:18 Almost Dying
    • 42:52 Prison Life
    • 45:59 Moving to Columbia
    • 52:00 My Mom is Different
    • 54:48 Do You Pray a Lot?
    • 58:01 Reconciliation
    • 59:49 Forgiveness
    • 01:05:31 I’m not Retiring
    • 01:09:24 My Album is My Story
    • 01:10:11 Some Misunderstanding People Have
    • 01:12:37 Surgery and Recovery
    • 01:13:46 Talking is Therapy
    • 01:15:12 Nicky on Fast Five

    Episode Resources:

    Dubbed by ElevenLabs and this link: https://elevenlabs.io/jay_shetty

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    On Purpose with Jay Shetty
    enSeptember 02, 2024

    10 Proven Strategies to Boost Productivity & Create a Clear Plan for Achieving Your Goals

    10 Proven Strategies to Boost Productivity & Create a Clear Plan for Achieving Your Goals

    Do you feel unproductive?

    How can you boost your daily productivity?

    Today, Jay talks about how to become productive without feeling burned out. In a world where productivity often leads to burnout, Jay offers practical and transformative strategies to help you achieve more while reducing stress. Whether you're feeling overwhelmed by an endless to-do list or struggling to manage your time effectively, this episode provides the tools you need to reclaim your focus and energy. 

    Jay shares the importance of creating a workspace that fuels productivity and how subtle changes, like scent and sound, can enhance your environment. He also highlights the significance of workplace trust and how identifying whether an issue is people- or system-related can save you time and energy. He wraps up with insights on "monk mode," a method to achieve deep focus in the midst of distractions, and encourages listeners to experiment with these principles to find what works best for them..

    In this episode, you'll learn:

    How to focus on one task at a time for better productivity

    How to identify key drivers of success 

    How to lean into your momentum for maximum output

    How to use a 'to start' list instead of a to-do list

    Tune in to discover how to be productive without compromising your well-being, and walk away with actionable tips that you can implement immediately. 

    With Love and Gratitude,

    Jay Shetty

    What We Discuss:

    00:00 Intro

    02:29 Burnt Out Already?

    04:03 Tip #1: Doing One Thing at a Time

    10:10 Tip #2: Clean Your External Space

    12:40 Tip #3: Create a To-Start-List

    14:17 Tip #4: Give Yourself Positive Validation of Task Completion

    18:51 Tip #5: No Email Until 10AM

    19:47 Tip #6: Goal of the Day, Goal of the Week

    22:03 Tip #7: Know When is Your Most Productive Time

    23:41 Tip #8: Create a Space of Workplace Trust

    26:21 Tip #9: Focus on What’s Causing Success or Failure

    27:42 Tip #10: Lock Into Your Task

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    Chris Voss: #1 Secret Formula FBI Negotiators Use To Always Get What They Want & 4 Ways to Apply These Tactics to Your Life

    Chris Voss: #1 Secret Formula FBI Negotiators Use To Always Get What They Want & 4 Ways to Apply These Tactics to Your Life

    What's a simple negotiation trick you can try today?

    How can you get better at persuading others?

    Today, Jay welcomes former FBI lead international kidnapping negotiator and author of "Never Split the Difference", Chris Voss. He is renowned for his innovative negotiation strategies that emphasize empathy, emotional intelligence, and tactical communication. After retiring from the FBI, Voss founded The Black Swan Group, a consultancy firm that provides negotiation training for businesses and individuals. He is also a popular speaker and has taught negotiation at various business schools.

    Chris discusses his journey from being on a SWAT team to becoming a lead FBI negotiator. He shares that his career path changed after a knee injury and his growing interest in crisis response led him to hostage negotiation where he found the work more satisfying than his previous roles, emphasizing the importance of decisive action in crises.

    Chris and Jay discuss how human beings are naturally wired to be negative as a survival mechanism, which impacts negotiations. He reframes negotiation as a collaborative process rather than a confrontational one and suggests that effective negotiation often goes unnoticed because it looks like seamless collaboration. They also talk about gender dynamics in negotiation, with Voss providing advice on how women can better negotiate in environments where they might be undervalued.  

    In this interview, you'll learn:

    How to calm tense talks

    How to negotiate with narcissists

    How to disarm aggression

    How to foster collaboration

    How to build rapport

    In any situation, effective negotiation is not about winning at all costs but about creating a shared path forward that benefits everyone involved. 

    With Love and Gratitude,

    Jay Shetty

    What We Discuss:

    • 00:00 Intro
    • 01:23 Becoming a Lead Negotiator
    • 04:08 Suicide Hotline Conversations
    • 08:03 Labeling the Negative Emotions
    • 09:35 Negotiation Isn’t a Form of Conflict
    • 14:59 How to Get Someone to Collaborate with You?
    • 21:15 How Do You Slow Down?
    • 25:10 How Do You Prepare for a Negotiation?
    • 29:54 Biggest Negotiation Mistakes
    • 31:42 Always Look for the Patterns
    • 40:20 Used and Taken Advantage Of
    • 44:21 The Illusion of Control
    • 46:17 What’s Your Intention?
    • 48:37 How to Negotiate a Better Salary?
    • 50:49 Reward Strategy in the Workplace
    • 53:33 Negotiating Unfulfilled Salary Raise 
    • 58:57 How Can Women Negotiate Better?
    • 01:00:57 Negotiations That Don’t End with a Deal
    • 01:05:03 Work with the ELFs
    • 01:11:05 Polite Boundary Setting
    • 01:16:29 How to Not Be Emotional When Negotiating
    • 01:22:08 Are You in the Right Relationship?
    • 01:25:55 Respecting Other People’s Values
    • 01:30:52 Tactical Empathy Documentary
    • 01:34:01 Chris on Final Five

    Episode Resources:

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    They Weren't The One For You and That's Ok (8 Steps to Breakthrough Heartbreak)

    They Weren't The One For You and That's Ok (8 Steps to Breakthrough Heartbreak)

    How did you realize they weren't the one for you?

    How did you cope with the heartbreak?

    Today shares a detailed exploration of the emotional journey involved in recognizing and accepting that someone you once believed was "the one" for you, wasn't actually the right person. Often, it’s common for people to convince themselves that someone is the perfect partner, even before that person has committed or shown signs of being a suitable match. This can lead to heartbreak when the relationship fails, but  it’s okay because the person wasn't truly right for them either.

    Jay also discusses the importance of understanding whether the person was truly healed from past wounds or whether they were presenting a version of themselves that wasn’t authentic. Consider the idea that sometimes people stay in relationships out of fear of being alone rather than genuine love or connection. And if a partner is unable or unwilling to engage in meaningful conversations, they might not be the right person.

    In this episode you'll learn:

    How to recognize when someone isn't right for you

    How to focus on your partner's reality, not ideals

    How to prioritize meaningful conversations

    How to stay self-aware after a breakup

    How to balance emotions in a relationship

    Remember, it's okay if someone wasn't the one for you—what matters most is that you remain true to yourself and continue to seek the love and connection you deserve. 

    With Love and Gratitude,

    Jay Shetty

    What We Discuss:

    00:00 Intro

    01:54 They Weren’t For You and That’s Okay

    05:04 #1: When People Show You Who They Are, Believe Them

    09:09 #2: They Never Showed Up When It Mattered

    10:55 #3: They’re Still Healing

    12:41 #4: They Kept Saying We Can’t Do This

    16:37 #5: You Were Chasing the Whole Time

    18:53 #6: They Made You Feel Detached

    19:13 #7: You Are More Scared Of Being Alone Than Be With Them 

    20:58 #8: They Couldn’t Open Up in Meaningful Conversations

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    Dr. Aliza Pressman: How to Avoid Your Parents Mistakes & Raise Confident and Resilient Kids

    Dr. Aliza Pressman: How to Avoid Your Parents Mistakes & Raise Confident and Resilient Kids

    How do you help your children build confidence?

    How do you teach your kids to be resilient?

    Today, Jay welcomes Dr. Aliza Pressman. Aliza is a developmental psychologist with nearly two decades of experience working with families and healthcare providers. She is the host of the Raising Good Humans podcast and an expert in parenting strategies and child development. Dr. Pressman is also the author of The Five Principles of Parenting: Your Essential Guide to Raising Good Humans, where she offers practical advice and insights for parents looking to raise emotionally resilient and well-rounded children. 

    Aliza begins by discussing whether everyone should become a parent and emphasizes the importance of being intentional and reflective before making that decision. She suggests that potential parents should think about their own values and how they want to approach parenting. She explains that having a strong, secure bond with a child is crucial for their development and that this bond can evolve over time, even if there have been mistakes along the way. 

    Some children are more sensitive and require a specific environment to thrive, while others are more adaptable. She encourages parents to be mindful of their child’s unique needs. The discussion moves on to discipline and encouragement. Dr. Pressman suggests that discipline should focus on teaching rather than punishing, with clear boundaries set for the child’s safety and well-being. When it comes to building confidence, she emphasizes that helping children develop skills (competence) is more effective than simply giving praise.

    In this interview, you'll learn:

    How to handle parenting guilt and shame

    How to set boundaries for your child

    How to build your child’s confidence

    How to discipline effectively

    How to foster independence in your child

    How to build a secure attachment with your child

    By focusing on building secure attachments, setting clear boundaries, and fostering independence, parents can create a nurturing environment where their children can thrive. 

    With Love and Gratitude,

    Jay Shetty

    What We Discuss:

    • 00:00 Intro
    • 02:57 Should Everyone Be a Parent?
    • 04:29 How Do We Get to Be Who We Are?
    • 05:50 Secure Attachment Relationship
    • 07:15 Feeling of Guilt and Shame as a Parent
    • 11:07 Tiny Moments to Build Resilience
    • 15:31 The Tendency to Overcorrect
    • 17:03 What is Effective Reflection?
    • 21:44 Learn to Reflect with Your Children
    • 26:31 Failure as a Parent
    • 31:14 Different Forms of Communication with Children
    • 35:10 What is the Right Approach to Discipline?
    • 39:10 Three Parenting Styles 
    • 41:36 Tension and Rejection Can Be a Motivation
    • 45:34 Dealing with a Child Who Doesn’t Want to Open Up
    • 50:12 Your Presence is Important
    • 51:46 How to Have a Social Media Conversation?
    • 57:12 How to Raise a Confident Human?
    • 01:01:40 Allow Kids to Showcase What They Learned
    • 01:05:53 Adults Can Work on Themselves
    • 01:07:23 Aliza on Final Five

    Episode Resources:

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    6 Steps to Detox from Your Phone & Reduce Your Anxiety Levels

    6 Steps to Detox from Your Phone & Reduce Your Anxiety Levels

    How often do you check your phone daily?

    Do you feel anxious when you’re away from your phone?

    Today, Jay addresses the growing concern of excessive phone and internet usage, exploring its detrimental effects on mental and physical health. He begins by explaining how activities like swiping, liking, and commenting on social media provide our brains with dopamine hits, which can create a cycle of dependency and compulsive behavior. Despite the benefits of technology, such as increased connectivity and access to information, many people feel less connected and more distracted, anxious, and impatient.

    Jay elaborates on the neurological aspects of dopamine and its role in pleasure-seeking behaviors, emphasizing that problems arise when we expect constant rewards from our online activities. He draws parallels between the brain's response to food and its response to digital consumption, advocating for a balanced approach that avoids overindulgence in either.

    In this episode, you'll learn:

    How to become more conscious of your internet use

    How to have wifi-free meals

    How to replace morning phone use with healthier habits

    How to stay mindful when using technology

    How to engage in a cell phone detox

    The ultimate goal is to create a healthier, more intentional relationship with technology, leading to a more fulfilling and balanced life.

    With Love and Gratitude,

    Jay Shetty

    What We Discuss:

    00:00 Intro

    01:46 On Your Phone All the Time?

    05:32 Losing Control Over Phone Use

    06:19 Six Steps to Phone Detox

    07:01 Dopamine

    11:23 People Aren’t As Happy As Before

    13:39 How Often Do You Check Your Phone?

    14:27 Cortisol

    17:26 Step 1: Become More Conscious

    19:19 Step 2: Wait an Hour Before Going Online

    21:18 Step 3: The WiFi-Free Meal

    23:45 Step 4: Watch What You Consume Online

    24:54 Step 5: Limit Potions

    25:48 Step 6: Intermittent Fasting

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    Alexis Ren & Allie Michelle: 3 Ways to Stop Putting a Guard up in Love & Why You Need to Change Your Mindset On What Success Means in Dating

    Alexis Ren & Allie Michelle: 3 Ways to Stop Putting a Guard up in Love & Why You Need to Change Your Mindset On What Success Means in Dating

    How can you start letting your guard down in love?

    How can you become more open and vulnerable in your relationships?

    Today, let's welcome Alexis Ren and Allie Michelle. Alexis is a model, entrepreneur, and social media influencer with over 18 million followers on Instagram. Known for her advocacy of mental health and self-empowerment, Alexis has leveraged her platform to promote wellness and personal growth. She is also the co-founder of "We Are Warriors," a female-driven wellness community focused on fostering self-love, strength, and growth among women worldwide. 

    Allie is a bestselling author, spoken word artist, and certified yoga, breathwork, meditation, Reiki, and craniosacral therapist. She is passionate about holistic health and personal development, which she incorporates into her work. The duo are the co-founders of "We Are Warriors," a female-driven wellness community focused on fostering self-love, strength, and growth among women worldwide. 

    Alexis and Allie's friendship began when they were preteens and they share how their relationship has been a cornerstone of their personal growth, providing mutual support through life's challenges. A significant turning point in their friendship occurred when Alexis's mother passed away, leading to Allie’s family adopting Alexis. 

    A significant theme throughout the discussion is the balance of masculine and feminine energies, which Alexis and Allie explore in depth. They describe how these energies play out in their lives and work, with Alexis often taking on a more masculine, action-oriented role, while Allie embodies a more feminine, intuitive approach. They emphasize the importance of recognizing and honoring both energies within oneself and in others, as this balance has been crucial in their personal and professional lives.

    Alexis and Allie also address the societal pressures that women face, particularly around beauty standards and career expectations. Both women emphasize the importance of breaking free from limiting beliefs and societal expectations to find deeper fulfillment and authenticity.

    In this interview, you'll learn:

    How to support a friend

    How to manage criticism

    How to build a strong friendship

    How to stay authentic

    How to handle creative blocks

    How to empower others

    Embrace the balance of your masculine and feminine energies, break free from societal expectations, and empower each other to thrive on the journey to self-discovery and growth.

    With Love and Gratitude,

    Jay Shetty

    What We Discuss:

    • 00:00 Intro
    • 03:38 Beginning of a Friendship 
    • 08:25 Growing Together Independently
    • 10:21 Going Through Big and Small Changes
    • 15:19 Creative and Emotional Intelligence
    • 18:30 Validating and Complimenting Each Other 
    • 21:59 Types of Archetypes
    • 27:18 What's Holding Women Back?
    • 29:46 Start Embracing Your Feminine Energy
    • 33:38 Why Did It Trigger You?
    • 41:00 How to Prepare for Life
    • 45:23 Living an Internally Peaceful Life
    • 52:44 Balance Between Masculine and Feminine Energy
    • 01:02:25 Dealing with the Imbalance in Your Energy
    • 01:07:00 You Can Do Uncomfortable Things
    • 01:10:16 The Best Journaling Practice
    • 01:14:39 Speak to Your Subconscious
    • 01:16:55 Try Leaning Into the Moment
    • 01:23:27 Relationship Checklist 
    • 01:28:38 Alexis and Allie on Final Five 
    • 01:37:46 Giving Each Other the Grace of Change

    Episode Resources:

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    Why Your Unresolved Trauma is Keeping You Stuck & How to Rewire Your Brain to Move Forward with Laverne Cox

    Why Your Unresolved Trauma is Keeping You Stuck & How to Rewire Your Brain to Move Forward with Laverne Cox

    How does unresolved trauma impact your life?

    How can you rewire your brain to overcome trauma?

    Today, in the On Purpose podcast, Jay sits down with actress and LGBT advocate, Laverne Cox. Laverne’s groundbreaking performance on "Orange Is the New Black" made her the first openly transgender person to be nominated for a Primetime Emmy Award. In addition to her acting career, Laverne Cox has been involved in various advocacy and awareness campaigns, making her a significant figure in the ongoing struggle for transgender and LGBTQ+ rights. Her work has contributed to greater visibility and acceptance of transgender individuals in the entertainment industry and society at large.

    In this episode, Laverne and Jay dive deep into transgender rights, media representation challenges, and how empathy can make a big difference in our divided world. They also discuss how fake news and false information on the internet can be a problem and why learning how to spot them is crucial. 

    Laverne also shares personal experiences and insights that shed light on the struggles and triumphs of the transgender community. She also talked about the need for structural change, greater investment in education, and the role of love and empathy in promoting understanding and healing. 

    In this interview, you'll learn:

    • The power of personal stories in changing perceptions and fostering empathy
    • The struggles and rights of transgender individuals in society
    • Ways to challenge and correct misconceptions about transgender individuals
    • The importance of uncomfortable conversations and understanding why having difficult discussions is essential for growth and progress.

    Remember that understanding and empathy can bridge even the widest divides, and it's through collective efforts that we can work toward a more inclusive and compassionate world. 

    With Love and Gratitude,

    Jay Shetty

    What We Discuss:

    • 00:00 Intro
    • 01:10 Childhood Memories That Define Who Laverne Is Today
    • 10:51 Reparenting Her Inner Child
    • 18:27 Why Is Denial Unhealthy?
    • 25:05 Try To Let Go Of All Your Thoughts
    • 27:43 The Fear and Freedom of Growing Older in Hollywood
    • 31:13 Unlearning Transphobia and White Supremacy
    • 46:06 Fight for Trans Rights and Mental Wellness
    • 59:03 Bridging the Divide Through Thoughtful Conversations

    Episode Resources:

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    Robert Greene: How to Deal with Negative People When They Are in Your Family, Friend Circle or Work

    Robert Greene: How to Deal with Negative People When They Are in Your Family, Friend Circle or Work

    How do you deal with negative people close to you?

    How do you stay positive around negative people?

    Today, Jay welcomes Robert Greene, known for his bestsellers like "The 48 Laws of Power" and "The Daily Laws." Robert's works draw on historical figures and events to provide insights into the dynamics of power and social influence. His books are often used as guides for personal development, leadership, and understanding the complexities of human interactions. 

    Robert shares tips on dealing with negative people, emphasizing the importance of emotional distance and understanding that everyone has their flaws and shares his thoughts on the idea that our sense of self is just a mental construct, and real enlightenment comes from letting go of our egos. He also stresses the importance of questioning your beliefs to truly understand who you are and what you’re meant to do in life. 

    Followed by Jay and Robert's discussion on why it's more important to judge people by their character rather than their intelligence or charm, how a strong character is shown by handling criticism well, working well with others, and managing stress. They also talk about how modern life can make us less empathetic and the need to genuinely connect with others. 

    In this interview, you'll learn:

    How to deal with negative people

    How to develop empathy in modern life

    How to question your own beliefs

    How to stay true to yourself

    How to handle criticism constructively

    How to manage stress effectively

    By understanding the nature of the self, maintaining emotional distance from negativity, and focusing on genuine connections, we can foster a stronger sense of empathy and authenticity in our lives.

    With Love and Gratitude,

    Jay Shetty

    What We Discuss:

    • 00:00 Intro
    • 05:31 How to Deal with Negative People?
    • 09:04 Look Behind the Mask
    • 13:26 Getting Attracted to the Wrong People
    • 15:02 Filling Up the Emptiness
    • 17:23 Surprising Characteristics in Humans
    • 19:10 Our Capacity for Empathy
    • 21:31 What’s Your Most Repeated Thought?
    • 22:34 How Quiet the Mind
    • 24:54 Becoming More Aware
    • 30:20 How We Process What We’re Experiencing
    • 33:42 Who Really Are You?
    • 37:44 How People Think About You
    • 41:00 People’s Perception of You
    • 43:46 The Before and After
    • 46:57 Timeless Knowledge in Books
    • 49:58 What Makes You Excited?
    • 53:16 The Second Self
    • 55:57 The Core of Your Reality
    • 59:21 Limited Language
    • 01:01:41 The Limited Circle of Harmony
    • 01:04:49 Different Thoughts About the World
    • 01:11:04 Slowing Down
    • 01:13:21 Robert on Final Five  

    Episode Resources:

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    4 Ways We Self-Sabotage & 3 Ways to Improve the Relationship We Have With Ourselves

    4 Ways We Self-Sabotage & 3 Ways to Improve the Relationship We Have With Ourselves

    What’s blocking you?

    What’s holding you back?

    Today, Jay talks about the concept of self-sabotage, examining how it manifests in various aspects of our lives and offering strategies for overcoming it. Self-sabotage is defined as behaviors that undermine our own success, happiness, and stated goals. These actions often occur subconsciously, rooted in deep psychological patterns formed during early childhood.

    Jay outlines four primary ways people self-sabotage: chronic lateness, procrastination, putting oneself down, and perfectionism. He also discusses the habit of putting oneself down, which can manifest through over-apologizing or refusing to take credit for accomplishments. This behavior is often linked to low self-esteem or an internalized critical voice from childhood.

    In this episode, you'll learn:

    How to Recognize Self-Sabotage

    How to Stop Putting Yourself Down

    How to Change Negative Self-Talk

    How to Understand Your Triggers

    How to Set Boundaries

    By understanding and working through these patterns, you can unlock your full potential and achieve the success and happiness you desire.

    With Love and Gratitude,

    Jay Shetty

    What We Discuss:

    00:00 Intro

    03:08 What is Self-Sabotage?

    05:41 Passive-Aggressive Behavior

    08:22 Behavior that Counters What We Tell Ourselves

    11:08 What Leads to Self-Sabotage?

    14:26 #1: Chronic Lateness

    16:22 #2: Procrastination

    19:53 #3: Putting Yourself Down

    23:15 #4: Perfectionism

    27:01 Three Ways to Deal with Your Self-Sabotaging Behavior

    28:53 weird noise in the background

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.