Podcast Summary
Strategies for Overcoming Avoidance: Cara shares her personal experiences and effective strategies for overcoming avoidance, invites listeners to join her podcast 'Unfuck Your Brain' for more tools, and asks for votes in the ABA's annual top 100 online resources competition.
If you're enjoying this podcast and looking for more tools to manage stress, anxiety, and overwhelm in various areas of your life, check out Cara Lowenstahl's new podcast, "Unfuck Your Brain." Previously known as "The Lawyer Stress Solution," this podcast now offers weekly episodes with the same cognitive science-based techniques, but with wider applications. Cara, a former lawyer and certified master coach, invites listeners to join her over there. In this episode, she discusses a listener request about avoidance and shares her personal experiences and strategies for overcoming it. Additionally, Cara asks for listeners' help in spreading the word about her podcast by voting for it in the ABA's annual top 100 online resources competition. She emphasizes her commitment to sharing these valuable tools with as many lawyers as possible, both through her coaching business and free content.
Understanding the root cause of avoidance: To overcome avoidance, identify and address the underlying emotions instead of focusing solely on the task itself.
When we find ourselves avoiding certain tasks, it's essential to understand that we're not actually avoiding the action itself, but rather the feelings that come with it. Avoidance and procrastination are related, but avoidance occurs when there's no deadline, and we don't do something for an extended period. Commonly avoided tasks include going to the doctor, organizing belongings, learning new skills, and ending unfulfilling relationships. The reasons for avoidance often stem from our thoughts, and we tell ourselves that we'll do it when we have more time, money, or priority. However, these are not actual deadlines, and the day never comes. To overcome avoidance, it's crucial to identify the underlying feelings and address them directly, rather than focusing on the action itself. By acknowledging and confronting the emotions, we can take steps towards completing the tasks and improving our lives.
Understanding the role of thoughts in creating feelings: Recognize negative thoughts causing fear or anxiety, challenge them, and take deliberate actions towards goals despite fear.
Our brains are wired to avoid unpleasant feelings, even if it means not taking actions towards our goals. The fear or anxiety we experience is a result of our brains predicting that we will have unwanted thoughts and feelings in the future if we attempt to do something new or challenging. This is a survival mechanism that helps keep us alive, but it can also hold us back from achieving our potential. Therefore, it's essential to recognize that our feelings are caused by our thoughts and to challenge the negative predictions our brains make. By understanding this, we can take deliberate actions to overcome our fears and move towards our goals. For instance, if you have an ambitious career goal but keep avoiding it, consider what thoughts are causing the feelings of fear or anxiety. Perhaps you're thinking that you won't be good enough or that you'll fail. By recognizing these thoughts and challenging them with evidence to the contrary, you can reframe your mindset and take action towards your goal. Remember, your brain may predict that future you will have unpleasant feelings, but it's up to you to be in charge and make the decision to take action despite the fear. In essence, the key to overcoming avoidance is to recognize the role of thoughts in creating feelings and to challenge the negative predictions our brains make. By doing so, we can take deliberate actions towards our goals and live a more fulfilling life.
Identifying and Challenging Fears: Recognize and challenge subconscious thoughts and fears that make tasks seem daunting. Write down all fears and anxieties, gain perspective, and make tasks more approachable.
Our avoidance of certain tasks or situations often stems from subconscious thoughts and fears that make the task seem off-putting. Our brains predict negative outcomes and emotions, creating feelings of anxiety, overwhelm, or dread. For instance, if you're trying to bring in your first client but keep avoiding calls or meetings, your brain might predict feelings of awkwardness, embarrassment, or failure. Similarly, if you want to start a podcast but keep putting it off, your brain might think it'll take forever, be expensive, or that no one will listen. To overcome this, the first step is to identify and challenge these thoughts. Write down all your fears and anxieties surrounding the task, allowing yourself no room for "I don't knows." By acknowledging and understanding these thoughts, you can reframe them and gain perspective, making the task less daunting and more approachable. Remember, your brain's primary goal is to protect you from feeling terrible, but it's important to recognize when these predictions are holding you back rather than helping you.
Identify and replace unconscious thoughts: To overcome avoidance, identify and replace unconscious thoughts with new, empowering ones. Seek help if needed.
Our feelings of avoidance towards taking action on a project are often rooted in unconscious thoughts that we fear will lead to unwanted feelings. To overcome this, we need to identify these thoughts and intentionally replace them with new, empowering thoughts. This process of changing our thoughts can help us take action despite our fears. The key is to find thoughts that resonate with us and that we believe in. If this is a challenge, resources like coaching sessions can be helpful in developing these new, empowering thoughts. Remember, the feelings we're trying to avoid are just predictions based on our thoughts, and we have the power to change those thoughts and break the cycle of avoidance.
Achieve business success and maintain work-life balance with The Clutch system: Join The Clutch community for expert guidance, support, and proven methods to accomplish more without stress, enabling work-life balance and personal growth.
The Clutch system, which includes a video module and a workbook, offers a proven method for building and managing a successful business while maintaining a healthy work-life balance. This system, as shared by the speaker, has enabled them to achieve business success, spend time with family and friends, pursue hobbies, and even relax, all while dealing with common modern-day challenges like overwhelm, stress, and endless to-do lists. The Clutch community and expert guidance provide essential support and help applicants implement these principles effectively. By joining the Clutch, individuals can learn to accomplish more without the stress and transform their work life and other areas of their lives as well. To learn more and join, visit unfuckyourbrain.com/forward/theclutch or text your email address to 347 934-8861 for a mobile site link.
