REAL Self-Care: Burnout Is Not Your Fault & the Way Out with Dr. Pooja Lakshmin
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Explore "systemicchange" with insightful episodes like "REAL Self-Care: Burnout Is Not Your Fault & the Way Out with Dr. Pooja Lakshmin", "Boundaries, Burnout and the 'Goopification' of Self-Care", "Confronting Police Violence and Racism in France", "He Started the First Police Academy at an H.B.C.U. It Was Complicated." and "D.L. Hughley On Tyre Nichols & Fox News's Reaction To The Released Video | Ibram X Kendi & Nic Stone" from podcasts like ""We Can Do Hard Things", "The Ezra Klein Show", "Consider This from NPR", "First Person" and "The Daily Show: Ears Edition"" and more!
Love it or hate it, self-care has transformed from a radical feminist concept into a multibillion-dollar industry. But the wellness boom doesn’t seem to be making a dent in Americans’ stress levels. In 2021, 34 percent of women reported feeling burned out at work, along with 26 percent of men.
Dr. Pooja Lakshmin, a psychiatrist, has observed how wellness culture fails her patients, who she says are often burned out because of systemic failures, from the stresses that come with financial precariousness to the lack of paid family leave. In her book “Real Self-Care: A Transformative Program for Redefining Wellness (Crystals, Cleanses, and Bubble Baths Not Included),” she encourages people to look beyond superficial fixes — the latest juice cleanses, yoga workshops, luxury bamboo sheets — to feel better. Instead, she argues that real self-care requires embracing internal work, which she outlines as four practices: setting boundaries, practicing self-compassion, aligning your values and exercising power. Lakshmin argues that when you practice real self-care, you not only take care of yourself, but you can also plant the seeds for change in your community.
In this conversation, the guest host, Tressie McMillan Cottom, and Lakshmin discuss how the pandemic opened up a larger conversation about parental burnout; how countries with more robust social safety nets frame care as a right, not a benefit; why it’s fair to understand burnout as a type of societal “betrayal”; how to practice boundary-setting and why it can feel uncomfortable to do so; the convenient allure of “faux self-care”; and more.
This episode was hosted by Tressie McMillan Cottom, a columnist for Times Opinion, a professor at the University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill, and the author of “Thick: And Other Essays.” Cottom also writes a newsletter for Times Opinion that offers a sociologist’s perspective on culture, politics and the economics of our everyday lives.
Mentioned:
More information about Ezra’s Jefferson Memorial Lecture
“We Don’t Need Self-Care; We Need Boundaries” by Pooja Lakshmin
“How Society Has Turned Its Back on Mothers” by Pooja Lakshmin
“Our Obsession With Wellness Is Hurting Teens — and Adults” by The Ezra Klein Show with Lisa Damour
“A Legendary World Builder on Multiverses, Revolution and the ‘Souls’ of Cities” by The Ezra Klein Show with N.K. Jemisin
Book Recommendations:
Living Resistance by Kaitlin B. Curtice
The Emotional Lives of Teenagers by Lisa Damour
The Fifth Season by N.K. Jemisin
Thoughts? Guest suggestions? Email us at ezrakleinshow@nytimes.com.
You can find transcripts (posted midday) and more episodes of “The Ezra Klein Show” at nytimes.com/ezra-klein-podcast, and you can find Ezra on Twitter @ezraklein. Book recommendations from all our guests are listed at https://www.nytimes.com/article/ezra-klein-show-book-recs.
This episode of “The Ezra Klein Show” was produced by Kristin Lin. Fact-checking by Michelle Harris. The senior engineer is Jeff Geld. The senior editor is Annie-Rose Strasser. The show’s production team includes Emefa Agawu and Rollin Hu. Original music by Isaac Jones. Audience strategy by Kristina Samulewski and Shannon Busta. The executive producer of New York Times Opinion Audio is Annie-Rose Strasser. Special thanks to Sonia Herrero.
Chief Gary Hill on how to get more Black officers on the force — and transform cop culture through training.
D.L. Hughley and attorney Ben Crump discuss the police killing of Tyre Nichols and the precedent set by the swift arrests of the five Black police officers. Ibram X. Kendi & Nic Stone discuss why it is important to give yourself grace when learning how to be antiracist.
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This week on the podcast I’m joined by one of my Advanced Certification in Feminist Coaching students, Lindsay Poelman, and her husband, Danny, as we discuss what it’s like for men to recognize their own patriarchal socialization.
Tune in as we talk about how patriarchal conditioning is not a zero sum game, how patriarchy can be oppressive to people of all gender identities (not just women), and why the feeling of disempowerment in privileged white men can actually lead to positive change.
Get full show notes and more information here: https://unfuckyourbrain.com/257
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This episode contains depictions of violence
Almost two years ago, a shocking nine-minute video was released showing a Minneapolis police officer, Derek Chauvin, fatally kneeling on the neck of George Floyd.
Mr. Chauvin is now serving a long sentence for murder.
A few weeks ago, a trial began in the case of the three other officers who were on the scene that day. They are charged with violating Mr. Floyd’s civil rights during the arrest that caused his death.
Guest: Kim Barker, an enterprise reporter for The New York Times.
Have you lost a loved one during the pandemic? The Daily is working on a special episode memorializing those we have lost to the coronavirus. If you would like to share their name on the episode, please RECORD A VOICE MEMO and send it to us at thedaily@nytimes.com. You can find more information and specific instructions here.
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For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Transcripts of each episode will be made available by the next workday.
In today's episode, Andy is joined in the studio by heavy metal singer Tommy Vext and the co-founder of Black Opts & BLM of the greater New York area, Hawk Newsome. They discuss various political issues, including the cultural problem in the police departments, identity politics, reparations for the black community, and how we can unite together to make America great.
In the mental health community, there’s a new term: “Eco-Anxiety.”
Our guest in this episode, Jay Michaelson, has been thinking hard about climate change for many, many years. Michaelson is a meditation teacher, rabbi, lawyer, activist, and journalist. And he is also a core teacher in the Ten Percent Happier app. He’s covered climate change extensively, and has taught environmental ethics at Boston University Law School and Chicago Theological Seminary. He has also been a leading environmental activist in religious communities.
In this conversation, we talk about what Jay thinks some meditation teachers get wrong about climate change, what he calls the “delusion” that individual habit change can make an impact, how we can use meditation to engage more effectively in the kind of politics he says we need to move the needle on a systemic level, and how to use meditation and deep breathing to handle eco-anxiety.
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Art meets science! Problems meet solutions! Climate change meets … hope? In this atypical episode, things get casual as hell as Alie sits down to talk about the Drawdown Design Project: an illustration non-profit started by filmmaker, Emmy-nominated television editor and longtime friend Andy Hall. When he’s not having to edit Alie on Innovation Nation, Andy is the founder and creative director of the Drawdown Design Project, which commissioned some of the world’s most sought-after artists to illustrate climate solutions outlined by Drawdown.org. What resulted was the just-released limited-edition 200 print run of ENGAGE, EMPOWER, CULTIVATE and ELECTRIFY. Andy walks me through the passion, the production and the process of raising money for rainforests while making something gorgeous and uplifting. Also: I used to serve snacks on film sets.
Get one of the 200 limited-edition Drawdown Design Project prints
Follow Drawdown Design Project on Instagram and maybe win a poster!
More info on climate solutions at Drawdown.org
A donation went to Rainforest Coalition
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Sometimes it feels like fighting climate change is all about dealing with the many little things we as individuals are doing wrong (hello single-use coffee cups, plastic bags, and eating dairy). While these bad habits are important to address, are we losing focus on the bigger picture? Luisa Neubauer draws on her experience at the front lines of activism to strategically reframe the climate crisis and identify the unique ways we can make systemic change. Luisa Neubauer is a climate activist, author and leader of the "Fridays For Future" school strike movement. In 2018, Luisa Neubauer co-initiated the "Fridays for Future" school strike movement Germany, which was inspired by Swedish teen Greta Thunberg. In fear of growing up in a world of rising global temperatures, Neubauer is organizing mass action to urge governments to comply with the 2015 Paris Agreements. To learn more about "How to Be a Better Human," host Chris Duffy, or find footnotes and additional resources, please visit: go.ted.com/betterhuman
Trevor discusses a Kentucky grand jury's decision not to file homicide charges against police officers for the killing of Breonna Taylor, which set off a surge of protests.
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Laverne Cox discusses "Disclosure," her documentary about Hollywood's portrayals of trans people, and argues for professionally elevating members of marginalized communities.
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The New York Times attacks Mount Rushmore, just in time for July 4; the Black Lives Matter organization finally comes under fire; and China ends Hong Kong’s freedom.
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Racial injustice takes one’s breath away. It reaches back to the psychic asphyxiations of the Middle Passage, slavery, and Jim Crow—cut-offs from home, family, freedom and justice. Racism persists in systemic inequities and ongoing instances of police violence.
The death of George Floyd, handcuffed, pleading, and unable to breathe, has inspired a collective rising in protest against current brutality and historic inhumanity. Breath as essence, consciousness and soul gives voice to lamentation and outrage. We cry out for the clean air of fairness, because racism is utterly breathtaking. Dr. Fanny Brewster joins us for today’s important discussion.
References
Books by Fanny Brewster, PhD are available on Amazon.
The Racial Complex: A Jungian Perspective on Culture and Race
Archetypal Grief
African Americans and Jungian Psychology: Leaving the Shadows
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